From Father to God of Mischief
by thelastclarissa
Summary: Sequel to "From 'Weird Looking' to 'Gorgeous Man is Gorgeous'", so established relationship. Loki's memory had been tampered with, leaving him on Midgard believing himself to be human for 7 years. During that time he meets Darcy & they have a son. Then Odin restores his memory, needing his help back on Asgard. But what does this mean for Darcy & Loki? Rated T for now. Might go up.
1. Prologue

_**As of 12/18/2012:** This chapter has been updated! Yayyyy. =P_

* * *

_And whence a son is born to the Allfather,_

_upon his head a curse be:_

_for by his hand will the mighty fall_

_and the land lie open to the greedy._

_But when all seems without hope,_

_look to the frost._

_There are hidden treasures deep within_

_the blood of the kin that was lost._

-Asgardian prophecy

The prophecy had hung over Odin's head head his whole adult life, and it was the reason that he had put off having children for a long time. The whole fifty years that he'd been married to Frigga, in fact, and before that he'd been _very _careful.

Frigga knew this when they married, and she agreed, reluctantly, to remain childless. Theirs had not been a love match, and she was still punishing herself for deeds done long ago. In a way, she did not feel she even _deserved_ a child.

But time passed, and Frigga learned to forgive herself. And from that forgiveness, yearning bloomed until it became nearly all she could think about. Every spring her spirits sank lower. Every new mother mocked her. Every year, on the first of May, she put her pride aside and asked Odin, _please_, if they could have a child.

And every year he said no.

But Odin watched his wife's listlessness with growing concern. He saw the longing in her eyes when she spoke to the children of the city as she brought food to the needy from the palace's kitchens, and he thought of what the future might hold for him.

So one year when she asked him, he said yes. He had never seen her so overjoyed before! Her beauty was legendary, but now she practically shone like a star in the heavens.

Until it became apparent that fate was playing some kind of cruel trick on her. Because Frigga, the goddess of fertility, was barren.

And now the more he thought about it, the more he began to think that a child was a good idea. He wouldn't be around forever, at any rate- and then who would rule Asgard? And as far as prophecies went...well. They weren't written in stone, were they?

So where before he had avoided siring a child like it was the plague, now Odin found himself in the distasteful position of needing a fertility charm. He bought hundreds, from all the most famed sorcerers and enchanters, but to no avail.

Though they had not married for love, Odin had grown rather fond of Frigga. She was one of the strongest people he'd ever met, and he admired many things about her. So when he saw his wife cry, that was it. He decided to seek the Norns for help.

The Norns were the overseers of the fates of all, and to ask their advice one had to travel to where the roots of the great Ash tree Yggdrasil grew. The Norns kept court there, chained to their post as they were forever cursed to make sure Nidhogg, the dragon, kept gnawing the roots of the tree. All manner of wild creature roamed the branches, and serpents wound around it's limbs, their fangs dripping venom onto those below.

Naturally, this had made the the Norns quite cranky and unpleasant, so when people came to ask their advice, they demanded something in payment. It was always something that was held dear and was hard to part with, not something that the Norns themselves necessarily _needed_.

Thus when Odin approached he was wary. The tales he had heard of the great dragon still could not have prepared him for how massive the beast was face to face. Odin was no bigger than one of it's great, blind, eyes. Smoke poured from it's nostrils with every breath and it did not lift it's head from it's task once while Odin was there- it's snout buried in the roots of the tree, tearing and chewing metalically with a ferocious enthusiasm.

But Odin had faced many fearsome things in battle, and he did not even blink an eye at it.

The Norns watched him come, silently- almost _hungrily_.

They had once been Asgardian goddesses, but they were so twisted now by time and by the serpents' acid that they could no longer be called such. Their flesh was as wrinkled and shriveled as an old apple, and discolored and scarred all over. Their hair was long and wiry where they had any; their bald, discolored skulls shining through the patches.

One was blind, her eyes as milky white as Nidhogg's. Another was deaf, according to the tales, and her eyes were sharp and predatory. The third was said to be driven mad. Once the fairest of them all, she could no longer decipher between the present, past, and future but lived in a world of her own inside her mind.

And between the three of them, they saw all the fates of the worlds.

Odin stood before them, mind frozen in awe for a moment. These were the figures of the stories he'd been told as a child.

"Oh fates," he said, bowing his head with respect. "I have come before thee to beg a boon-"

"Yes, yes," the one in the middle said impatiently. The blind one. "We know this."

The mad one cocked her head to the side. Odin had stared death in the eyes on many occasions and he had never flinched, but her stare made the hair on the back of his neck stand on end.

"The great All-father seeks a spell to make him a _real_ father," she said, and laughter came bubbling up from her as it might from a child when faced with something particularly delightful. "So much pain," she smiled dreamily at him, her pale blue eyes staring at him with interest. "The woman cries," she breathed, "with such longing. She will die of it." She shook her head. "Poor Frigga," she crooned, though she had a twisted smile. "She can never quite get what she wants, can she?"

The blind one smacked her sister across the face, and she yelped and then started giggling.

"Enough," the blind one snapped at her. "You're being more creepy than usual."

Odin was not sure what the mad one had meant by that remark about Frigga, but he pushed on. "Can you help me then? Can my wife have a child?"

The blind one seemed to be the leader, and she sent him a disgusted look now.

"You gods," she said with a curl of her lip. "You are all the same. You believe _you_ are the exception even when one of _our_ prophecies- which come with a 100% guarantee of accuracy, by the way- state that you _will regret it_ should you continue in your foolishness." She spat at his feet as if to tell him what she thought of that, and Odin swallowed back his annoyance at such an indignity.

"But," she said, her blind eyes staring at him blankly, "If you are sure that you want a child, there_ is_ a way."

Odin thought of Frigga, laying in bed, facing the wall and curled into herself, silent sobs wracking her body.

"I'm sure," he said firmly.

"Well then," the blind one said, a conniving smile growing on their face. "We can help you. In fact, I have in my hand here," she produced a small vial that glowed pink, "the answer to your problem."

"What is it?" Odin asked doubtfully.

"It's a potion to fix your wife's ovaries," she snapped. "Duh. Now do you want it or not?" She tapped her toes impatiently.

"Yes!" Odin exclaimed. "I've told you- I do!"

She glared at him and his anger instantly deflated at the look in her eyes.

"I don't care for your tone," she said, the words all the more threatening for how mildly she had said them.

He apologized and asked what they wanted in exchange for the vial.

"An- ouch!" The mad one shrieked as the blind one smacked her face again.

"Not yet!" the blind one snapped at her. "That's another time, you twit."

The mad one rubbed her cheek, looking at the blind one with a pout that was horrifying on her dried, cracked lips.

"I don't understand," Odin said with confusion.

"You'll see," the blind one said with a knowing smile. "Or perhaps you won't." This made the mad one laugh hysterically. "No, this time we ask of you-"

"The child," the deaf one said, speaking for the first time, her voice like the rattle of a tree's branches in the night. "You must give up the first child that your wife bears."

Odin paled. "I can't do that," he said.

"Well, then we can't help you," the blind one snapped at him. "Thanks for wasting our time. Goodbye."

Odin stood frozen in place. "That's it?" he asked.

"Do you not get how this works?" The blind one asked testily. "You ask for something, we tell you what it costs. If you don't want to pay the price then you can't have what you came for. Therefore, you have no reason to be here. Therefore _therefore_: leave."

"Wait-" he swallowed. Frigga could have other children. She would be fine. It would hurt her, but she would get past the loss and in the end she would be happier for it. "I'll do it."

"Great," the blind one said brightly. She handed him the vial, and Odin stopped the reflexive gag that caught in his throat when their fingers touched. "In that case, have your wife drink this during the next full moon, do your thing, and in nine months I guarantee you will have a perfectly normal baby. Then I want you to take that baby, put it in a basket, and send it down the river."

"Send it down the river?" Odin asked in horror. "Surely not!"

"Oh. Whoops," she said. "Forget that last part. That's an old Midgardian thing. New order: take the baby and give it to a family out in the borders of your kingdom, and don't tell them whose baby it is. You can tell your wife whatever you want- tell her it died if you like. It may as well have, because if it doesn't grow up away from court then _bad things will happen_. Capisce?"

Odin nodded.

"Then be gone with you," the blind one said, shooing him off.

"Until next time," the mad one said dreamily.

_Next time_. As if Odin would ever go back. Still, he'd gotten what he came for, even if it had certainly been a steep price to pay.

He told Frigga of his fortune when he returned and she thanked him from the depths of her heart.

They followed the Norns' instructions, and indeed, nine months later a healthy baby boy was born. Frigga christened him Baldr.

Odin felt as though he were committing one of the gravest of atrocities, but he gritted his teeth and did it anyways: he told Frigga that the baby had died as she slept off the effects of the birth, and he made sure it was sent to a family on the edges of Asgard, as the Norns had said to do.

Frigga had wept until she had no more tears, and she refused to eat or sleep for weeks. But just when Odin felt he would have to do something drastic, a sudden change came over her.

She refused to speak of Baldr, and pretended to know nothing of him when Odin tried to explain how sorry he was that it had happened. She started eating again, and sleeping, and she visited the needy with more frequency, immersing herself in the constant motion of the city.

The next May, she asked if she could have a child, and again Odin said yes. Again, she was overjoyed.

Odin breathed a sigh of relief that all was back to normal.

Nine months after that, Thor was born.

When Thor was six years old, Asgard entered into a war against Jotunheim that took all of his attention. When the long war was at last won and he came across a baby, abandoned in the snow, he thought of the prophecy- and, truly, it looked so helpless and small laying there. So out of place in the harsh realm of Jotunheim.

What could he do? He brought it home with him, marveling that the baby's blue, patterned skin turned pale at his first touch.

He had thought that Frigga would be pleased to raise another child, but she was less than enthusiastic. When questioned, all she would say was that Frost Giants were not to be trusted. But when Odin said that he could make sure someone else raised the baby, she would not hear of it. She could not stop staring at the baby.

"You're different," she said, holding him up before her. Already he had a cap of inky black hair, and his green eyes gazed back at her own cornflower blue ones soulfully. "Aren't you, Loki?" The baby spit up on her chest, and Frigga smiled even as she wiped herself off with a towel.

And so Loki and Thor grow up as brothers, close despite their competitiveness. Odin watched Loki for signs that he would give away his being a Frost Giant, but he appeared to not even be aware of , and Odin saw no reason to enlighten him.

All was calm.


	2. Chapter 1

_**As of 12/18/2012:** This chapter has been (slightly) updated._

* * *

Loki's three year old son, Nathan, threw another toy car at the wall in his room. He was sulking, Loki knew, because he'd thrown a tantrum earlier and now was in a time-out. Jane, Thor, and their young twins were coming over to have lunch with them and spend the day- had actually just rung the bell. Nathan was quite a handful when he was upset, and Loki hoped seeing the twins, Isaac and Liam- who he loved- would calm him down a bit.

Loki would be especially grateful if that were the case today because he hadn't been sleeping well for the past few weeks. He'd been plagued by nightmares of battles he'd never fought, and of people he'd never met. It left him tired and feeling drained. And he'd just been feeling..._off_. He had an appointment to see a doctor at the end of the week that Darcy had made him make. He was sure it was nothing too serious- probably just mostly stress from work- but she worried, bless her.

He put the rag he'd been using to mop up Nathan's spilled orange juice in the laundry bin and quickly washed his hands before he went to let Thor and Jane in.

Except, it was Thor and...someone else. An older man with white hair and an eye-patch, who seemed to radiate authority. Was he with the cops or something?

"Thor?" Loki asked, confused. "Where's Jane?" He was a little taken aback by the somberness Thor was showing. He was usual quite enthusiastic and happy these days, Jane having brought him out of his shell a little bit, but he was definitely very subdued at the moment. "Is she okay? Did something happen? Come in, please." He gestured for them to enter. "And I'm sorry, I don't know your name," he said to the older man, who also looked very serious. "Who are you?'

The older man stared at him strangely. For that matter, Thor was looking at him weirdly too. What was going on?

"I am Odin," he said, and Loki swore he could almost remember something...

"Brother-" Thor started to say, but stopped as Darcy came in. They were standing awkwardly in the living room at this point. Well, it_ would _be awkward, if it wasn't so confusing. Actually no. It was both.

"Hey Thor," Darcy said, frowning at him and Odin. "Where's Jane and the boys?" She put an arm around Loki's waist and rested her head on his shoulder as she was wont to do, and he put his arm around hers. Sideways hugs, she called them.

Loki grew uncomfortable under the scrutiny of both Odin and Thor. Odin was staring at Darcy and his embrace with a look of distaste and almost revulsion. Thor just looked very sad. It was all very unusual.

"What's going on here?" Darcy asked, picking up on the bizarre vibes everyone was giving off. "Am I missing something? Did something happen? What is happen?"

"Yes, I'm afraid so," Thor said, laughing humorlessly as he tried to find the words. "You see-" he stopped, and started again. "What happened was- fuck. This is harder to do than I had thought."

"Thor? You're scaring me," Darcy said, alarmed, and Loki lifted her hand absently and kissed it reassuringly.

"Maybe we should sit down?" Loki suggested. Whatever it was that Thor was trying to say was obviously difficult for him, and it felt forced and unnatural to just be standing around their living room.

Thor considered it, but shook his head. "This needs to be done quickly," he said, almost to himself.

"You wanted to be the one to say it," Odin said testily, "So _say_ it, or I will. Enough delaying- there is much that must be done, Thor. You know this."

Well, that was a strange thing to say, Loki thought.

Thor just nodded though."Loki, do you remember back when we were kids?" he asked.

"Thor," Loki said, exasperated by this line of questioning that was coming out of the blue. "You know I don't remember our childhood. We've talked about this. What the hell is going on?"

"What about mom and dad? Do you remember _them_?"

Loki's brows furrowed. "You are asking if I remember our _parents_? Have you gone daft?"

Thor just looked at him. "What are their names?" he asked, dead serious.

"Their names? I cannot believe this is happening-"

"Their _names_, brother. What are they?"

"Well, I- they're...I mean...they're mom and dad," Loki finished somewhat lamely. He never really thought about them, unless Darcy brought up how unhappy it made her that he wasn't in contact with them. He hadn't been since he was eighteen and he'd found out that he was adopted. That had been some thirteen years ago.

"You don't know their names, do you?" Thor asked. It was...true. _How_ could it be true!? "That's because your memory has been tampered with. Mine had been as well. We are not human, brother. We are Asgardian- gods. Immortal. I know this is going to sound insane- _I_ certainly thought so when father came to tell _me_ yesterday, but it's true. I remember everything now."

"Okay," Darcy said, her arms crossed and brows raised in annoyance. "_What_ are you talking about? Memories being tampered with? Being _gods_? This is a really bad idea of a joke, Thor."

"It is no joke," Thor said seriously. "I wish that it were."

"You said _father_ came to see you," Loki said, grabbing hold of the part that at least made a _little_ sense. "What do you-?"

Thor looked over at Odin, who stared at Loki, his expression unreadable.

"_Him?_" Darcy asked, shocked.

She stared at Odin incredulously, taking in his bizarre appearance, garbed in foreign-looking clothes that seemed even faintly medieval. Her eyes fell to the scabbard at his side, and the sword hidden within it."_You're_ his father?" she asked dubiously, searching for a family resemblance in his face.

Odin stared back at her, taking in every detail of her as well- the messy bun her hair was falling out of, the green T-shirt her generous breasts strained against, and dark blue fitted trousers. He narrowed his eyes, furious at the mess that had become of his sons' lives. Both were married- and to _mortals_. It was unnatural. And Thor...Thor had _children_. _Mortal_ children. Odin did not envy him that.

"It is unfortunate that this," he nodded at Darcy, who huffed in offense, "has occurred, and something must be done about it- but there are more important things happening." He winced, shifting his weight and flexing his arm.

"Are you okay?" Darcy asked reluctantly. She _really_ didn't like this guy's attitude, but...she didn't necessarily want to see him in _pain_.

Odin flicked his eyes over her, dismissing her. "I am well enough," he said shortly, and turned his attention to Loki again, who had been awfully quiet while this was going on. He was trying to make sense of what Odin and Thor were saying.

He wanted to dismiss it as outright ridiculous, the way he was sure Darcy had, and all reason pointed to that- and yet...it just sounded _familiar_. Like he had known this at one point.

"Loki, you are needed back on Asgard. I can restore your memories there, and I have need of your help- of both of your help," Odin said, looking at Thor as well. "Much has happened that needs righting, and I cannot do it alone. Especially not with my...well, this is not the time."

Loki considered Odin and Thor. They were both so serious. He was intrigued, and excited, and wary. Because he _believed_ them, as crazy as it was. What they were saying struck a chord within him, and he _needed _to find out what they meant.

"Honey," he said, looking down at Darcy, who clearly thought they were full of shit. "I don't know how to explain it to you, but- I need to know this. I need to know what they're talking about."

Darcy did a double-take. "_What_?" She asked, sure she must have misheard.

"I've been having those dreams," Loki said, trying to explain in words the deep, unsettling certainty that was gripping him. "And I've been feeling so strange lately. I think these things are related- I _know_ they are. I can feel it in my bones. I'm sorry, Darcy. I know this is probably freaking you out." He cupped a hand to her cheek, staring deeply into her confused eyes. "I'm sorry. I love you."

"I don't understand," she whispered, holding his hand to her cheek. "Stop it. Please. Just...stop it."

Thor shifted awkwardly and looked away, disliking being present at such an intimate moment. Odin just waited impatiently.

"We don't have time for this," he said.

Loki narrowed his eyes at Odin. "There is always time for Darcy," he said angrily. Darcy laughed shakily, feeling a prick of tears that she blinked quickly away. This was all so wrong! It shouldn't be _happening_. And Loki was just _okay_ with it!? She had no idea how to deal with this. Was she the only one who was sane?

"Loki,"she pleaded. "Think about what you're _saying_. It doesn't make _sense_."

He smiled at her tenderly. "I'm sorry. I know. I just- I can't explain it." He turned to Odin. "How do we...get there?"

"The Bifrost," Odin answered, pleased that Loki finally seemed ready. "Heimdall will open it for us."

"Bifrost...?" Loki asked, the name clicking somewhere in his mind. He'd heard that before...

The sound of little feet drew him from his thoughts. Turning around he saw that Nathan had run out into the living room and stood staring at Odin and his clothes in awe.

"Who are you?" Nathan asked with the bold curiosity of a child as he sucked his thumb. It was a bad habit that Darcy had been trying to get him to break because she'd heard it screwed up your teeth- at the moment though it just served to emphasize how young he was.

Loki vowed silently to himself that he would be back in a couple days. He really didn't want to leave, but he _needed_ to know why he'd been feeling so strange and what was going on, and the only way to do that was to go with Odin.

Odin raised his brows and sighed. "So you too," he said to Loki. Then both his sons had mortal children. Perfect.

"That's daddy's daddy," Darcy said, scooping Nate up into her arms in an unconscious and futile desire to shield him from these strange, new developments. Nathan was pleased that he wasn't being yelled at, because he was supposed to be in a time-out.

"Daddy's going to go on a _short_," she emphasized 'short' sharply, and Loki nodded affirmation, "vacation with him and Uncle Thor."

Nathan frowned, sulking. His dad was gone enough as it was! "Daddy! No." He blinked his big brown eyes up at Loki, willing him not to go.

"Sorry, kiddo," Loki said, smiling regretfully. He'd really miss them both. It would be fine though- he'd see them soon.

"Fine," Nathan said mulishly. "Then I'm coming with you."

Loki chuckled. He ruffled Nathan's hair and kissed his cheek. "Another time," he told him. He and Darcy looked at each other for a long moment, and Loki wished so badly that he could _explain_ just how much he _needed_ this, because he could see that she just didn't understand- and he couldn't blame her. He _knew_ it sounded crazy. He still didn't really even believe it would actually work. Seriously, he was waiting for some guy called 'Heimdall' to- what? Beam them up, or something? It was ludicrous.

He looked at Odin though, letting him know he was ready, and Odin glanced up at their ceiling. "Heimdall? Now."

He felt a slight wave of nausea as the room, with Darcy and Nathan, shimmered away and was replaced by a large, gold, circular room that was quite obviously like nothing found on earth. The nausea passed quickly, leaving him in awe of his surroundings. It was an intimidating room. You could feel the power in it, and the history.

The walls were covered in intricate golden carvings that told a story that he couldn't quite follow, and the floor was made of tiles with black patterns on them that could have been a language of some sort. The patterns on the tiles moved, swirling around on the floor as if alive. Loki was struck with a sense of Deja-vu. He _knew_ that he had been here before, though he couldn't remember when.

A great black man in golden armor stood in the center of the room on a raised dais that held a sphere of white light resembling a lightning bolt. It crackled from side to side, and Loki knew instinctively that it was what had brought them here. It must be the Bifrost- working much like the theory behind the Einstein-Rosen Bridge that he'd been researching and studying for years.

The coincidence was pretty astounding, so much so that Loki doubted it _could_ be coincidence- making him even _more_ confused about just what the hell was going on.

Thor was unfazed by this, presumably having just done it recently. Loki wondered why Odin would have brought Thor back alone in the first place if time was so urgent (though _why_ there was so little time remained a mystery), and why he hadn't just brought them both at the same time as he was doing now.

"Thank you Heimdall," Odin said to the big man. "That will be all." The man nodded once and backed out of the room, the huge, ornate door shutting heavily on his way out. Odin turned to the boys. "Come here, Loki," he said. "I will return your memories. You shall be as you once were."

Well, when phrased like _that_, Loki wasn't so sure he _wanted_ to get his memories back. He liked who he was. He had a good life. What if he didn't like who he'd used to be? But it really wasn't even a choice- if he could learn more about why he felt so strangely, like their was something under his skin straining to be free, then he would know what it was.

He stepped forward and Odin touched his scepter to Loki's heart. Instantly memories assailed him, the past two hundred years coming rushing at him all at once, and his immortality settling firmly in place once more.

And the _power_...his magic swarmed through him and he welcomed it like a long lost friend, almost sighing with relief that it was back, his eyes sliding closed.

After a moment, Odin stepped back, the weight of the scepter leaving his chest, and Loki opened his eyes as they flashed red and then back to blue. He remembered everything now.

* * *

Darcy stared in shock as Loki, Thor, and Odin all vanished right in front of her. They had actually _vanished._ How was that even _possible_!? She forced herself not to freak out too visibly, because she didn't want to set Nathan off, but she was pretty blown away.

In her arms, Nathan blinked in confusion and frowned. "Daddy's on vacation then?" he asked.

Darcy took a deep breath and tried for a bright smile. She wasn't sure how close she got. "That's right Nate. Don't worry, he'll be back soon. Let's go see Jane, yeah? And see the boys?" She figured that if Thor was in on this whole thing too, then Jane had to be. And she had _a lot_ of questions. She just hoped Jane had answers.

"Okay," Nathan said, easily accepting this and sliding out of her arms. "Can I bring my race-car? I want to show them how fast it goes."

Normally she wouldn't let him take his toys out and he knew it, because they would inevitably get lost, so it was a bit cheeky of him to ask. But today? Today she was just glad that he was dealing with this so well. It was amazing (and terrifying) how naïve and trusting children were, though she was thankful for it right now.

"Sure, honey," she said, ruffling his hair and biting her lip. "Go find your shoes and get it. Mommy wants to leave in a few minutes."

He nodded, running off and shouting about "The fastest race-car that ever lived!"

Darcy got herself some water and leaned against the counter, scrubbing a hand over her face. This kind of thing wasn't supposed to happen in real life.

Taking a deep breath, she called Jane's cellphone. It rang for a long time and Darcy started worrying that Jane wasn't around, but she picked up finally.

"Darcy?" she said. There was noise in the background. "Boys! Put that down! Thank you...Sorry, Darcy. Just the usual shenanigans over here. But what's up? Has Thor been to see you?"

"Yeah," Darcy said. "You could say that. Loki and him just...left. I don't understand, Jane. They _vanished_. How is that even possible?"

Jane sighed commiseratingly through the phone. "Believe me, I know exactly how you feel. Come on over- I'm putting some tea on. This could take a while."


	3. Chapter 2

_**As of 12/18/2012:** This chapter has been updated!_

* * *

"No, no, you're doing it wrong. Like _this._"

Nathan was showing the boys how to correctly play with a race-car on the floor of Jane's kitchen. Jane and Darcy sat at the kitchen table, tea at hand. It felt so strange to be doing normal things, like watching after Nathan and making sure he didn't get too carried away with his game (sometimes he forgot that the boys were a year and a half younger than him), when she'd just seen something that by all rights shouldn't be possible. But she supposed that that was what it meant to be a mother: you were always looking after your kid, even when the world was going crazy.

"So what do you know?" Jane asked. She was going through a lot of the same things that Darcy was, having only found out yesterday that her husband was, in fact, a _god_. _Not_ really something that had been on her list of possibilities when he'd sat her down with a grave face. But he'd explained a lot of things to her, and so she figured she could help Darcy understand at least a _bit_ better.

Darcy laughed shakily. "Well, a whole lot of Not Much. That Loki believes something's wrong with him, and that it has something to do with that Odin guy. And that Thor believes it too. And that then all three of them just up and vanish. And that's really about it."

Jane nodded. "Okay," she said. Where to begin...? "Umm, let's see. I guess I should start this whole thing off by saying that I know it sounds mental, but I believe it. Thor showed me some stuff that just...I mean, it _can't_ be possible, and yet it _is_, and so...I don't know. I just believe him when he says things that sound crazy." She paused to look at Darcy, who shrugged as if to say 'Sure, why not?'. "Great. So most importantly I guess- they're not human-"

"Wait _what_?" Darcy asked, spitting a bit of her tea out in surprise. Nathan noticed and laughed before going back to his toy as she wiped her mouth with a napkin.

Jane smiled wryly. "Nope. They're Asgardian- from a different dimension. Something like the old Greek gods. They're practically immortal."

"Immortal as in living _forever_ immortal?" Darcy asked. It was a hard concept to wrap her head around- that _her_ Loki wasn't human. Jane nodded. "Well,_ that_ could cause a few problems."

"You're telling _me_," Jane said sadly, her gaze caught on the boys playing on the floor. How was it ever going to work, between the two of them? If Thor wasn't going to be growing old- he was to, what? Watch her and the boys grow old and die? There were some problems ahead.

"And something happened back on Asgard- that's the world that they're from- and Loki and Thor end up down here with their memories tampered with to make them think they were human and always had been. Which is strange enough on it's own, but apparently Thor and I had already _met_ and they wiped both our memories of it, which is just _ridiculously crazy_ and I don't even know, the odds of us meeting again are like a bajillion to one, but we did- and honey, we don't pull each other's hair, now do we? We've talked about this." Jane scooped up Isaac, who had been yanking on a bunch of Liam's hair and twisting as he shrieked.

"Pulling hair is bad," Nathan confirmed, shaking a finger at Isaac as Darcy would do to him when he misbehaved. "That's not okay to do." Again, he was parroting Darcy when he himself was bad, and it brought a brief smile to her face. He was such a good kid (most of the time).

Jane quieted Liam by bouncing him on her hip and rubbing his back. She looked up at Darcy again. "Where were we? Immortality?" Darcy nodded. "Right, well yeah. So then on top of that stuff, they've both been around for centuries. And now they have to help Odin with something that's going down on Asgard, and that's about as much as I know."

Darcy mulled this new information over for a few moments. It was a lot to take in. She wouldn't believe any of it, of course, except that she couldn't just explain away how they'd disappeared- and the explanation for _that_ meant taking a lot of other stuff on faith. She supposed that she wouldn't really be able to believe it completely until she saw Loki again and was able to talk to him. God, she missed him _so badly_. It wasn't like he'd been gone for more than a few hours, but it was the knowing that he was gone so far _away_ that made her miss him so much. She didn't want to have to figure this out alone.

Well, not _alone_, because Jane was being extremely helpful. But it wasn't the same. She wanted Loki.

"Mommy, I'm thirsty," Nathan said from the floor, his race-car in Isaac's hands on it's way to his mouth. Jane was in the other room, changing Liam.

"Okay honey," she said, picking Isaac up. "Thank you for the car, Zack," she said, prying it from his little fingers. "That's not for eating, sweetie, that's for winning races. Here, have this." He'd been about to cry, but she gave him one of the many teething rings that Jane had for them. Darcy had been lucky with Nathan, because he hadn't been too affected by his new teeth coming in, but poor Jane...both Isaac _and_ Liam had a terrible time of it.

Isaac gnawed on the ring, forgetting about the car. She'd learned from Nathan that as long as you gave them something else to hold, babies usually weren't too attached to what it was. Until they got to be older and realized what a prize they had, that is. _That's_ when it got harder. But at least by that point they typically weren't trying to put everything in their mouth.

"Mommy! Pay attention to me!" Nathan cried, pouting.

Darcy smiled. Nathan was always quick to help you out when he realized that you could be giving him attention instead of doing whatever else you were doing that could never be as important as him. "Sorry, Nate," she said. "What was it you wanted? You're thirsty?" She put Isaac down again, as he was now occupied by contentedly gnawing on the teething ring.

"Yeah," Nathan said, grinning. "A juice-box! I want a juice-box!"

This made Darcy grin, too. He was especially susceptible to sugar, and became a real demon when he had it, so he knew juice-boxes were a special treat- and he'd even already had juice earlier that day. That was the thing about kids though. You gave them an inch and they wanted a foot. She'd let him bring his toy, and now he was going to see what else she'd let him get away with.

"No juiceboxes today," she said. "Buuuuut, I will let you have some milk- as long as it's just a little." Milk was nothing special, of course, but it was a trick that Loki had found out, actually: to present something in a way that made it seem as if it was some great treat. Nathan usually fell for it.

Nathan pursed his lips, considering. He was so cute, with his head tilted calculatingly. "I guess that's okay. But I want a straw." He loved straws.

"It's a deal, buddy," Darcy said, getting him a plastic cup and a straw.

They spent the rest of the day at Jane's, neither woman wanting to be on their own. It was a long time before Darcy fell asleep that night though, her mind buzzing with everything she'd learned. Finally she fell into a light, restless slumber, her dreams full of phantom Loki's that she would chase but could never...quite...reach.

* * *

His magic thrummed through his body, making Loki feel more alive than he could remember ever feeling. He didn't even realize until Thor's intake of breath that his skin was blue.

"Loki?" Thor asked in astonishment, making Loki remember that Thor had never found out that Loki was part Frost Giant. Loki himself had only found out recently, before being sent to Midgard.

"Yes," he said, studying the indigo blue of the skin on his arms, and the lighter blue markings swirled all along that skin. He wondered what Darcy would say if she saw him like this. Darcy... His heart clenched painfully.

What was he going to do? With difficulty, he pushed the thought away and focused on the moment. He couldn't leave right away anyways. Someone must pay for what they had done to Thor and him. Loki turned to Odin, his face cold and sharp as he looked at the man who had raised him as his own, though his words were for Thor. "It was all a big secret. I didn't even know, until Jotunheim."

"There will be a time for that," Odin said, "But that time is not now. Tell me, what was the last thing each of you recall? I will fill you in on what has happened since then."

"The last thing I remember was my foolishness on Jotunheim, and then getting sentenced to Midgard," Thor said, somewhat ashamed. "I'm quite in the dark as to how things have come about."

Loki remembered quite a bit more, having been on Asgard while Thor was playing out his sentence. "Well, there was me finding out that I was a Frost Giant, and you falling into the Odinsleep," he said, being taken back into the memory as he spoke.

It had happened so suddenly.

Loki had been about to confront Odin on why he had lied to him for his whole life- he'd been so angry, so betrayed. So _ready_ for the confrontation. And Odin had almost mid-sentence fallen into the Odinsleep, right on the stairs. Somewhat deflated, he'd carried Odin up to his bed and laid him upon it. He'd told a guard to get Frigga, and she'd rushed into the room, more unsettled than he'd ever seen her. Loki had never seen Odin fall into the Odinsleep before, but apparently it had been unheard of for it to happen as it had, and Frigga had worried. She had been unlike herself, actually thanking Loki for his help where she normally was quite cool to him.

"Then you had named me acting regent during your sleep," he continued, frowning at Odin. Frigga had told him, and he'd been confused. It had been a show of trust that Loki hadn't expected, especially after learning that Odin had been lying to him about who he was. It had held off some of the anger and resentment that had been festering for a long time- not just about being a Frost Giant, but of living in Thor's shadow for so long, and of not being recognized. "Why did you do that?"

Odin shook his head in irritation, as if it was obvious. "You are my son, Loki. You were ready for it. But there is not time to get into it now. Is that all you remember?"

"No. There is more." He grimaced, remembering his idiocy. "It was Laufey." He'd made a deal with Laufey and then gone back on it. It had slipped his mind, what with how quickly events had taken place afterward, and he'd not been prepared for Laufey's counterattack. It was his fault that all this had happened. He was the one who had meddled with Laufey in the first place, and then it had been on _his_ watch that it had all gone wrong. "He somehow bypassed Heimdall and got into Asgard, knocking me out. That is the last I remember."

But things didn't add up. Like _how_ Laufey had gotten past Heimdall, and why it had taken so long for Odin to wake up- they'd been on Midgard for seven _years_.

"What did the people do?" Thor asked, aghast. "Surely Laufey does not now rule Asgard!"

"No," Odin agreed, "He does not. But it is not for lack of trying. Laufey set up a figurehead ruler, whom he was controlling. Apparently he concocted a story that I was gravely ill, to encourage the people to swallow it." Odin brushed it aside as if it was unimportant. "I've dealt with it, and I sent Laufey back to Jotunheim. But he gave me this to remember him by," he said, rolling up the sleeve of his sword arm. There was a long cut all long the side of his arm that had healed over into a scar, and from the scar the veins on his arm were black and terrifying. "I'm dying," he said.

"What is this?" Loki scoffed. "Dying? Impossible!"

"Surely not," Thor agreed. Their father was Odin! King of the Asgardians! He was a legend.

But Odin shrugged. "It has not healed yet, and it should have. I was fully restored from my Odinsleep at the time I got it, and it has still done this to me. I do not know where Laufey got his hands on it, but his blade must have been coated in some sort of poison, and I cannot find an antidote. Eating of the Apples of Idun have had no effect, nor have the countless other things I've tried. And it has spread. The veins on part of my shoulder are black now as well. I do not know how much longer I have, but it is working quickly. I have had this wound for only a month."

Loki frowned. "A month? Then you did not just awake? Why have you waited so long to recall us?"

Again Odin shrugged. "I did not immediately need you," he said simply. "There was much to do that required immediate action." He had had to put what he wanted as a father and husband on the back-burner, so that he could be the king he had to be. The people always came first.

He hesitated, struggling with the right way to say the next part. "Ah. I'm not sure how to put this, so I'm going to just say it," he said. Loki and Thor looked at him with curiosity. And would they hate him? Odin wondered. Would they think him a horrible person? He was a king, and he had been for many, many years. He was used to making hard decisions, and he was used to having to make unpopular ones, too.

For the most part, it didn't matter whether they were seen as good decisions or bad ones- the people trusted him despite it. But Odin found that he valued the good opinion of his sons rather more than other people's, and he did not want to lose it.

"You have-" he paused, wishing that he did not actually have to divulge this information. But it was well known, by now, around Asgard. There would be no keeping it from them any longer. "You have an older brother."

"Oh," Loki said, surprised that Odin was admitting to it. He had been under the impression that it was some great secret. "Yes, I know."

"Baldr," Thor supplied, a wistful look on his face. He had wanted to find this brother, ever since Loki had discovered him, but Loki had said no. Apparently it would bring Bad Things. "What has he to do with it?"

Odin stared at them in shock for a moment before narrowing his eyes at Loki. But of course. He had no idea how Loki had found out, but he supposed it had only been a matter of time- the boy had an affinity for discovering things that were meant to be secret. Well. Perhaps it was better, after all, that they had already known.

"There was a prophecy made, a long time ago," Odin said. "My firstborn son was to bring ruin to Asgard. The Norns told me that to avoid this fate I must have him raised away from court." His face went hard. "Laufey must have found out about the prophecy . He convinced Baldr to go along with his scheme, but it appears that when it came to disposing of you two and your mother, he had...reservations. Instead of killing you, as he was most likely supposed to, he used the power of the Tesseract to send you to Midgard, Loki. And you were already there, Thor, so he just wiped both your minds and planted new memories so you wouldn't be meddling in affairs here-"

"_Baldr_ is the one that did that?" Loki asked, astounded. He had thought for sure it would have been Laufey, or some other villain who had sent them to Earth, but _Baldr_? Technically, they weren't related, but Baldr would not have known that and would have thought that they were full brothers, as he and Thor were. It would explain the sentimentality he had over not wanting to actually _kill_ any of them, though Baldr had never met them before. But it was still unbelievable that he'd even possessed the knowledge of how to _use_ the Tesseract. Laufey must have told him.

Odin nodded. "I do not know whether he acted on his own or if Laufey poisoned his mind- Baldr sits in the prisons now, waiting a hearing and judgment. I will deal with him later." He had found that he had not been able to make himself face his oldest son. Too many conflicting emotions warred within him, and he knew he was not ready to be impartial, as a king ought to be when dispensing justice. Odin had been glad for the many reparations that needed his attention first. "At the moment there are more pressing concerns. The Tesseract, for one. Laufey has had his hands on it for nigh on seven months- and you know what that means."

The Tesseract was a cube of nearly limitless power that had been the prize of Odin's treasure rooms since the war with Jotunheim. It possessed the ability to do just about anything- it was figuring out _how_ to use it that was so much more difficult- another reason that Loki was astonished by what Baldr had accomplished with it. It was also the source of the Frost Giants' power, acting like a battery for them, keeping their powers charged, and without it- isolated as they were on Jotunheim- they had languished, becoming weak shadows of the fierce beings they once had been. That they'd had possession of the Tesseract for so long now, and that they held a bitter grudge against Asgard, boded ill.

"But how have they had it for seven months?" Loki questioned, his mind whirring. "Have you been asleep that whole time? That's a bit long for a nap," he couldn't help but add.

Odin glared at him. "Yes," he said shortly. "It is."

It was the downside of the Odinsleep- that once he fell into it, he could not be wakened until his body was replenished. It was beyond his control. It had been a long time since his last Odinsleep- since just after the war with Jotunheim, about two hundred years ago, in fact. While Loki and Thor were growing up he had kept putting it off and putting it off. There always seemed to be some reason why he should wait- and all was at peace, there had been no threat to get in shape for. It had been the foolish logic of an old man, though, because it meant that once he did fall under, he was under for a long time.

"Seven months," He repeated bitterly, his lip curling with disgust. He would never again take leave of his senses like that. "Though of course, for you two it would be seven _years_ because of that blasted time difference." And that was yet another thing that he could not forgive himself. If he had woken up sooner, he might have gotten them away from Midgard before they had tied themselves so perilously to it. _Mortal mates_.

Loki paled. "What do you mean time difference?" Why hadn't he heard of this before!? He supposed he hadn't really had that much to do with Midgard before all of this. There hadn't really been any reason he ought to have known. Would fate never smile upon them? Ill-fortune seemed to haunt him.

"Yes," Odin said heavily, looking at his youngest son. He was still dressed as a mortal, and his eyes yet carried that same softness to them that he'd showed on Midgard. He was much changed from the Loki that Odin had known, who had been all sharpness and lines. The mischief-maker that Odin had at times despaired of had been turned into this strange man who stood before him- his sharpness softened and dulled. "A month here is equal to a year on Midgard. Every day here is equal to about twelve days there."

"So time is passing much faster for Jane?" Thor asked, his voice strained. He hated being away from her.

Odin nodded. "Yet another reason that time is imperative- though I do not approve of your mixing with mortals," he said, frowning. It was not even just a matter of the crown and heirs. As a father himself, he knew the pain of losing a child- when he had given Baldr away, he had severed himself completely from him, grieving for him as if he had died. He did not wish that pain on his own sons. "No good will come of it."

"Don't start on that," Loki warned sharply, in no mood to talk of it right now. "What about Frigga? What happened to her?" He asked, realizing that Odin had avoided talking about her.

Odin looked away. "Frigga is gone," he said simply, and yet Loki could have sworn that those words were pulled from his very soul. The anguish in them- he had not realized how deeply his father felt for his mother. They were both so staid and cool when it came to affection.

"Gone where?" Thor asked, frowning with concern. "Is she on Ear- Midgard as well?"

"No," Odin said briskly. "No. She is in Jotunheim."

Jotunheim! Loki's brows rose. Thor, too, was surprised. But it was clear from Odin's expression that now was not the time to push more on this.

Odin suddenly started pacing back and forth, his footsteps loud and uncomfortable in the echoey and otherwise silent room. "What we need right now is to formulate a plan of attack. Laufey cannot be allowed to keep the Tesseract. He has too big a grudge against me and mine, and besides that Frost Giants are a dangerous bunch. Even without Laufey they should not have it- it is too much power, and I cannot trust them with it. There was a reason I took it in the first place."

In a way, Loki almost felt bad for the Frost Giants. There they were with the source of their power taken from them and they were left to suffer for years upon years, and then they get it back and grow strong again only to be forced to diminish once more.

But there wasn't exactly a way around it.

"So we surprise them," Thor put in, his hand flexing on Mjolnir in anticipation. One thing he had missed when he'd been human was the thrill of fighting- the exhilaration that you got in the midst of a fight, pitting brute strength against an opponent. It was invigorating. "That would be the best option. We attack them when they will not be expecting it. We gather the troops and we go _now_, I say."

"That's a bit hasty," Loki objected. This was typical Thor. He had clearly not thought this through. "You're ignoring crucial evidence that could alter how we should approach this."

Odin nodded, pleased that Loki had picked up on this. "Very good. For one thing- how Laufey was able to teleport over here in the first place, to find Baldr. He shouldn't have been able to. The connection between Jotunheim and Asgard has been carefully guarded by Heimdall. He could not have gotten past. Which means that he had some other method. Just what that method is, and how it came to be in his hands, is cause for concern."

Loki felt a prickle of guilt. It could very well have been his fault. He'd initiated contact with Laufey, and if he hadn't then who knew when or even _if_ Laufey would have been able to pull any of this. Before he could figure out a way to broach the topic so that he didn't come across as the fool that he'd been, the Bifrost gave a crackle.

They turned to it as one.

"Someone is coming," Thor said, hands tightening on Mjolnir and taking a fighting stance.

"Fuck," Loki swore. He was still dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, and he had no weapons on him. He would have to rely on his magic then, which he'd done many times before- but it had been a while since he'd used it. He would have felt more secure with a blade, as well.

"Heimdall!" Odin called behind them, drawing his own sword. But Heimdall had already been on his way- probably had noticed the moment the Bifrost gave a twitch- and he came rushing in, spear raised, and ready, his golden armor gleaming.

Odin turned to Loki. "Can you send word to the palace to send men?" The Bifrost Bridge separated them from the palace and the barracks, where the men were housed. It would be a ten minute ride at best. He cursed himself for not having brought men down earlier, though there was no reason that he should have. He nodded, creating a double of himself and having it run across the Bifrost Bridge to do so.

He didn't like making doubles of himself, because it took away from his concentration. He could choose which of his selves to have most of his consciousness in, but there was always vaguely in his mind all of the things that the other him was seeing and saying, and it could be dangerous- especially when he needed all his attention to protect himself.

"It is done," he said to Odin.

The Bifrost was crackling more fiercely now, and the portal to Jotunheim was opening up. Laufey could be seen at the head of a giant swarm of Frost Giants, his red eyes glowing maniacally. Loki had forgotten how tall they were- on average about fifteen feet, though there was some variance. And their faces were so sharp and angled, their blue skin glowing- they certainly looked every bit the villain. In their hands, swords of ice- deadly sharp and unnaturally cold. He'd heard tell of those swords from Odin as a child, and then had seen them first hand on Jotunheim with Thor, Sif, and the Warriors Three- the Frost Giants' swords would freeze you where they cut you, and if you didn't move fast enough, then your muscles would stop working from shock at the cold and the ice over the cut would quickly work it's way over you to finally encase you in a solid block of ice. It was imperative to never let their swords touch your skin, and if they did, for you to do a strange (and perilous, in the midst of battle where you were exposed from many angles) succession of jumping and rolling your muscles to get the blood flowing again as soon as possible.

On their last trip to Jotunheim though, Loki had gotten cut- and instead of freezing, his skin had rippled blue. It had been the first sign he'd had that he was other than Asgardian. Taking away the emotional impact of such a revelation, it was a good bit of trivia to know- because now when he fought them he knew he could keep going if he was cut without first needing to do those muscle spasms that were so dangerous. It was even more of an advantage because none of the Frost Giants knew, and so he could fight in a more fluid and surprising style that Thor, Odin, and Heimdall couldn't.

The patterns on the tiles just by the portal to Jotunheim stopped moving, and then frosted over, the room becoming cold as blasts of icy wind accompanied the Frost Giants into the room. The sudden dramatic drop in temperature really hammered in the differences between Loki and his adoptive family. It was as if someone had finally turned the heat off, though he hadn't realized that it had been on. The other three shifted uncomfortably before resuming their battle stances, being unused to and ill-prepared for the cold, immortal though they were.

Loki gathered his magic within him, a hundred different strategies and ideas flitting through his head of how and where to strike, and what to do if an attacker did _this_ as opposed to _that_. He'd fought a thousand times, surely, but his recent stint as human made him realize how _fun_ it was. The_ thrill_ of anticipation before a battle. The power of his magic was like a drug, beckoning him to use it, and he was only too glad to heed it.

At the same time as strategies were whirling through his mind and his magic was curling deliciously through him, an image of Darcy popped into his head, and of Nathan, feeling incongruous and out of place. What would they think if they could see him like this? he wondered. Would Darcy be horrified? Afraid? She hated violence. Couldn't stand to see a spider crushed, though she had a completely irrational fear of them. And Nathan...he was a three year old boy who looked up to his father as an idol. But what kind of idol was Loki? Perhaps, before, when he'd been a normal man...but now?

No.

He was not man one looked up to- he knew this. He wasn't that man anymore. Had never_ really_ been.

But then Laufey's feet hit the tiles, and a second later the rest of his swarm were coming, and all that existed was the moment. Thoughts of Darcy and Nathan vanished completely, replaced by strategies being put to use and the visceral satisfaction of employing his magic to protect those he held dear. And Heimdall.


	4. Chapter 3

_**As of 12/18/2012:** This chapter has been updated._

* * *

It had been a week. Seven whole days that Darcy had heard nothing from him. And to make matters worse, Thor was still gone too. Darcy had been staying with Jane during the days to help out with the boys, and, honestly, they helped distract Nathan, too, so it worked out well.

Darcy was furious, and scared. Knowing Loki, him not being back meant that something must have gone wrong. She would never be able to believe that he would willingly stay away from them for so long. How long could it take to find out about how you used to be a god, anyways? No. The fact that he was still gone meant that he could be in danger. And yet of course he'd had to go rushing off into it! But that was unfair of her. He didn't typically do things like that- she just felt so helpless against all of this new mythology-crazy-god-stuff.

Jane was dealing with her own missing husband. It was hard on her, Darcy could tell, but Jane put a smile on. "They'll be back," she would say with quiet faith when Darcy expressed her fear that something horrible had happened. Her brain seemed to be stuck on repeat or something- it was all that she could think of, day in and day out. Except, of course, for Nathan, who would never allow himself to be overlooked. Even with Jane, Darcy thought she might go out of her mind with worry if not for the distraction that Nathan was.

Because no matter how many times Jane said that they would be back, and no matter how much quiet faith she said it with, Darcy just couldn't help but wonder- why? She had no idea what went on back on that Asgard place- it might be filled with all sorts of horrendous monsters and whatnot. And it had been a week! A lot could happen in a week! As far as she knew, it was entirely possible that she would never see Loki again. Which was just... It was just...

It was 23,984,734% unacceptable.

Jane was a saint. Darcy was sure she hadn't been the greatest person to hang out with lately. She couldn't help expressing her doubts and fears- and yet Jane was always there, always with something positive and reassuring to say. Sometimes Darcy wondered if poor Jane felt she had to be strong not only for herself and the kids but for Darcy, too. Darcy wouldn't put it past her- Jane was the ultimate mother-hen. But Darcy had made a vow the previous night to try and stop being so selfish. She was determined to be a shoulder for Jane as well.

So she was sitting in the living room, watching the boys after bullying Jane into taking a nice, relaxing bath.

The boys had been pretty consumed by a bunch of blocks that they were either making into a city or destroying, depending on their age, so Darcy had gotten out the rough draft of the latest childrens' story she was working on and was going over them. Or trying to, anyways. She kept getting distracted by thoughts of Loki. Of course.

"No, Liam!" Nathan shouted, drawing her attention. "You can't do that!" Liam was picking up a block that had been part of Nathan's city, and his hand was poised as if to throw it. Isaac was gnawing on another block. Darcy sighed, putting her work away. This was both the blessing and curse of being a stay-at-home mom. You got to be with your kid all the time, but they got to disrupt your work as often as they wanted.

"Liam, honey, don't throw that," Darcy said, kneeling down with them and holding her hand out. "We don't throw things. Except parties. Sometimes we throw parties. But that'll be when you're older. And your parents are out of town. And you shouldn't actually do that because every movie says that you won't be able to hide how much your friends mess up the house and then you'll get grounded until you turn forever years old."

Liam pouted at her before throwing the block anyways. Darcy pursed her lips and raised a brow. "Oh. So that's how you want to play it, eh?" She hated doing the whole 'consequences-for-your-actions' thing, but it was kind of necessary. "Okay," she said, scooping him up. "Blocks aren't for boys who want to throw them. Here, you be by me and I'll give you some crayons that you can throw. At least those can't really hurt people."

She put him down on the floor by the table she had her papers at and gave him a few crayons. He looked at them consideringly. She went back to Isaac and traded the block he was chewing for a teething ring. He started crying. Then Liam decided that nope, crayons just weren't gonna cut it, and he started crying too. Nathan joined them, not one to be left out of anything.

"Oh god," Darcy said tiredly, surrounded by crying babies. Suddenly _she_ felt like crying, too. "Look what time it is- time for everyone to break down. What are we, cars? And why aren't there people mechanics?" she asked no one in particular. A moment later she sighed. "Doctors," she said. "They're called doctors. Christ, Laufeyson, get your life together."

Nathan looked at her, his little chin wobbling as he cried. "I want daddy," he said.

And there it was. It had to happen sometime, she supposed. He'd held out for a week, which was, frankly, surprising.

"I know, sweetie," she said, trying a smile. She wondered if she was succeeding. "I want daddy too. But he'll be back soon. Let's take a nap now- come on, I'll read you any story you want. Even a long one. We'll get the boys in bed too, and it'll be like a slumber party!"

"I don't want a nap!" Nathan shouted, throwing a block at the couch. "I want _daddy_!"

"Throwing things doesn't get what you want, Nathan," she said sternly. "And sometimes we have to do things that we don't want to. Now come on," she coaxed, picking up Isaac and Liam, who were still teary but not crying anymore. "Let's get a story. What about some more of The Hobbit? You like that one."

"I don't _want_ to! If _daddy_ were here he wouldn't make me!" Nathan shrieked, running out of the room and down the hall.

Darcy sighed. Great. So she was the bad guy then. She'd go get him in a minute, but the twins had to be dealt with.

"Is everything okay?" Jane asked worriedly from the top of the stairs with a towel around her hair.

The doorbell rang. Oh, wow. Everything just kept getting better.

"Just some meltdown shenanigans," she said to Jane. "I'm gonna put these two to bed and then probably head home with Nate. He could use some quiet time of his own."

"Okay," Jane said, her brow furrowing with sympathy. "I'm just going to be a minute, but I'll be down soon and I can take over with the twins." She smiled at Darcy. "I really appreciate the help, Darcy," she said earnestly.

Darcy nodded, a little ashamed that she couldn't be more helpful, and Jane disappeared. The door bell rang again, and she answered it awkwardly, a baby on each hip.

"_Thor_!?" She cried in surprise at seeing him leaning against the side of the house as she opened the door. He didn't look good. He was wearing the same clothes that he'd left in, and he looked pretty cut up. There was blood all over his tunic and splattered on his arms. Just what had they been _doing_!? Her heart seized up in fear for Loki, who wasn't with him. "What happened to you? Come in, come in. Why did you ring the bell, anyways?"

"My phone died, and I do not know where my key is," he said, struck vividly by the banality of his _phone_ being dead after being in a situation of_ life-or-death_ mere moments ago. He followed her in, his heart warming at the sight of the boys. It felt like ages since he'd last seen them. He held his hands out for them.

Darcy stepped back from him and he looked at her in confusion. "Thor,"she said apologetically, "you're covered in blood. Maybe get a little cleaner before you hold the babies? I don't know if blood-covered babies are a good idea."

"Oh," Thor said, shaking his head to try to clear it. He was still wound up from the battle and it was hard to switch gears. He had literally _just_ been deposited outside his and Jane's house (Loki had obviously been practicing his skill at using the Bifrost- he would have found it amusing to be better than Heimdall at his job) and was taking time to readjust to being back on Midgard so suddenly. "Of course. Where_ is_ Jane?"

"Thor?" Jane called breathlessly, rushing down the stairs. She stopped abruptly at the sight of him, taking in the strange clothes and the blood all over him. "Oh my god," she breathed in horror and concern. "Thor, are you okay? What happened?"

The babies were starting to get really heavy now, and Darcy really didn't want to intrude on this, not to mention that she should probably be going after Nathan- but she needed to know if Thor knew anything about Loki.

"I'll be fine," Thor reassured her, taking in the sight of her with a bittersweet look- so beautiful, and so smart, and kind, and loving. He loved her so much, and yet now his immortality would be forever a divide between them. He wouldn't grow old with her. He tried to push the thought from his mind. "I should wash."

Jane started laughing a little through tears. "Is that all?" She asked. He looked at her in confusion, and she hugged him tightly, disregarding the blood on his clothes. "I missed you so much. Where have you been? It's been a week!"

"A week," Thor repeated heavily, hugging her back. That thrice damned time difference! "I am sorry to have been gone so long, my love. I would not have had it that way if I could have."

"I worried," Jane whispered, blinking back tears. She wished she was stronger than this. While he'd been gone it had felt as if he had taken part of her with him, and now that he was back the world was right again. It seemed her happiness was entirely dependent on him, she thought wryly. But right now she was just so overwhelming happy to have him back that she wasn't going to dwell on that.

Darcy stood awkwardly, shifting the babies on her hips, her heart in the pit of her stomach. For little guys, they sure felt like frickin' sandbags. "Umm, not to ruin the moment or anything, but...where's Loki?" She braced herself. The fact that he wasn't with Thor had her expecting bad news- and yet... And yet, what if he was just at their house? After all, Thor had come to _his_, so why should Loki be waiting for her when she got home? Her heart soared at the thought, even as she tried not to let it.

Thor and Jane broke apart, Jane frowning down at the small patches of blood now on her arms. Her poor Thor- what had happened? She supposed that she'd have to take another shower then. But now that Thor was back...it held possibilities. The boys needed a nap anyways, so maybe-

"I'm sorry, Darcy," Thor said, his face grave. He still couldn't believe what Loki had done for him. He wanted to shake the little fiend for his foolishness- and at the same time, to weep in gratitude at his selflessness. "He's not coming back."

Darcy paled. "What do you mean?" Of course he was coming back. He had to come back. He was Loki. He was _her_ Loki. She vaguely noticed Jane taking the babies from her arms.

"You know of our history?" Thor asked.

"Kind of." Darcy flicked her eyes towards Jane and then back at Thor.

He nodded, grateful to be able to skip that. "Loki's memory is back. But there are threats to Asgard. The Frost Giants of Jotunheim had declared war Asgard, and we were attacked. An army of Frost Giants invaded through the Bifrost- a bridge-way between worlds- and we were unprepared. We held them off for a little while, but their sheer numbers were too great. All could very well have been lost, had Loki not done what he did."

Darcy listened in a state of disbelief. Bridges between worlds. Frost Giants. It was still so strange to hear this whole magical-god-stuff talked about so rationally by people she respected.

"What did he do?" she asked, dread making her feel dizzy.

"To cut the Frost Giants off from coming through to Asgard, he broke the Bifrost." Thor said, looking at her with sympathy. "Completely obliterated it, actually. It was..." he trailed off, remembering. "Well, it was incredible. I had not thought such a thing could be done. Of course, if ever one was to do it, it would be Loki."

He shook his head, his heart heavy. His poor, heroic, fool of a brother. The terrible decision that Loki had made, to stay behind, away from his beloved son and wife- Thor had seen it in his eyes in the split-second before Loki had shoved him through to Midgard. _"Both of us need not suffer, brother_," he'd said. What he'd meant was, both of them didn't need to be cut off from their families. Just Loki. After all, it was only Loki who could break the Bifrost.

Darcy frowned in confusion, her mind refusing to accept what her heart already had. "I don't understand. Why would he do something like that? How did he mean to get back?"

Thor smiled at her sadly. "He didn't."

* * *

_They are outnumbered. He has been in many fights before, but never one where he knew real fear. He had not known what life was, before Darcy, and before Nathan. Now he knows though. Now he fears death as he never has before, and it lashes out at him from all sides, only too eager for him to join it. _

_ Backup doesn't arrive for a while, and there are so many Frost Giants. They were like plants denied their sun those long years on Jotunheim, and had little to do but hone their skills until the opportunity arose for them to have their revenge. And he was the one who led them to it. He curses himself for a fool a thousand times for this- his petty little revenges and lessons so insignificant in the face of this payback._

_ They just keep coming, seemingly an endless supply of them, and it is quickly apparent that they simply can't fight off this number of skilled opponents. Something must be done, and it is up to him. He knows what he must do, and yet he hesitates, letting his heart rule him for a few precious moments before logic ruthlessly casts it aside. There will be many long days to regret the consequences of his actions, but it must be done._

_ Not all must be lost, though. Thor can still have years with Jane and his boys, and Loki can give that to him. "Both of us need not suffer," he tells Thor, who stares back at him in surprise as Loki shoves him through the portal to Midgard. Odin and Heimdall are busy fighting and pay no heed._

_ Now for the harder part. To isolate the Frost Giants. When he breaks the Bifrost, he can seal them off. The ones already in Asgard can be dealt with and the ones still in the portal would...he doesn't know. Die, perhaps. Or just be sent back to Jotunheim maybe. But The main thing is that none of the portals to any of the realms would work anymore with their power source broken. All would be effectively trapped where they were, excepting travel through Yggdrasill's roots- which is laughable. Normally, he has the ability to teleport- or 'flash'- between worlds, but that ability did not come back with the rest of his powers. Meaning he would not be able to see Darcy or Nathan- hence the hesitation._

_ It is the only way though, and he steels himself to it. His magic writhes through him and he lets it gather in strength as he fights his way to the dais at the center of the room. The Bifrost crackles like a Midgardian lightening-storm and he raises his arms to-_

* * *

"Uncle Thor?" Nathan said, peeking in from the living room before grinning and running up to wrap his arms around his leg. Children always loved Thor, and Nathan was no exception.

Darcy smiled, swallowing with difficulty. There was a sob lodged somewhere in her throat, but she wouldn't let it out until Nathan was fast asleep that night.

"Hello there, nephew," Thor said with a smile, ruffling his hair.

Nathan grinned at him for a moment, his previous tears forgotten. "Where's daddy?"

"Honey-" Darcy started to say, and then stopped, not really sure how she was going to be able to tell him. Thankfully, Thor understood, and he took over for her.

Kneeling down, his voice somber, he said, "Now, Nate, I'm going to tell you something, and I want you to listen very carefully. Can you do that?"

Nathan cocked his head to the side, confused at being talked to like this. But he nodded.

Thor smiled briefly. "Good boy," he said. He paused a moment to choose his next words. "Sometimes people can't do the things they want to do. Have you ever come across this?"

Nathan pouted, nodding his head. "Mommy won't let me have juice sometimes," he said.

"Right. Now, you're father wants to come home more than anything," Thor said. "But he can't."

Nathan frowned. "What?"

"Think of it this way- your dad is in a room, and he wants to come out so he can see you guys, but there's no door. He can't get out."

Nathan considered that. He looked at Darcy. "Mommy can build a door for him."

"Oh, honey..." Darcy said, blinking rapidly to hold back tears. "Mommy doesn't know how to do that."

"Then Daddy can make his own door," Nathan said, not understanding the problem. In his experience, grown-ups could do just about anything. And his daddy was pretty much the best grown-up there was.

Darcy looked at Thor, her eyes hesitant with hope. "Could he do that?"

"Hmm," Thor said, considering. "It is...unlikely. I have certainly never heard of anyone rebuilding the Bifrost. But, there are some artifacts that have transportational properties, though they are rare indeed and all but lost to record. If anyone could find a way home, though, it would be Loki." He looked at his sister-in-law, remembering how mischievous and clever Loki had been as a child. "I do not think this is the end."

It was possible then. Darcy felt a huge wave of relief. She could still see him again- he was not lost to her forever. Whatever happened in the meantime, she could face it on her own, knowing that they could be together again.

Darcy smiled slightly, the world looking considerably brighter.


	5. Chapter 4

_**As of 12/18/2012:** This chapter has been updated._

* * *

Loki woke up sweating. His heart was racing. He took deep breaths, concentrating on getting it back to an even tempo- regaining control of his body, even if he couldn't control his mind.

It was how he dealt with the nightmares. He laughed shortly. Abruptly.

Nightmares. Not exactly- after all, it was the same memory that he dreamed of night after night, his mind adding nothing of it's own and leaving nothing out. It was excruciating. How many times had he gone over that day in his head, how many times had he examined anything else he could have done- any other way to stop the Frost Giants- and always he came up with nothing.

It had been three days. Three days of being trapped on Asgard. He hadn't noticed at the time, so distracted by the events going on that the soft scent of geraniums lingering in the room hadn't made an impression. But he knew that scent- it was always carried with _her_ when she would visit him in the past. She had been there, unseen, as they discussed everything. He had no doubt in his mind that it was her who had taken his powers- she was more than capable of it- and that she had some sort of hand in Laufey's schemes. And for whatever reason she had allowed him back most of his powers.

It was infuriating though! What right had she to decide whether he should have his powers or not!? They were _his_. She had greatly overstepped whatever tense truce they had formed in the past.

Without his ability to flash, he was effectively a prisoner on Asgard, and already he pined for Earth, and for his family. He had forgotten how boring and _still_ Asgard was. A stark contrast to the continuous winds of Jotunheim- and even Earth had weather. But not Asgard. It is as if the whole of it is in a constant state of suspended animation. Despite all scientific reason, the sky is empty of both sun, moon, and clouds. No rain, no snow. No wind shakes the stalks of grass. It is lifeless and dull, though stately.

He was staying in the palace, of course, his room opening onto a balcony that overlooked the city. Every morning he would wake up from a restless night to stare out at this city that he had grown up in, and the people that he had given up his world to save.

He couldn't decide if it was a weakness of character or a strength, what he did. It had been difficult for him to do, hinting at it being a strength- and yet, it's side-effects were entirely at opposites with what he wanted, pointing toward weakness.

It wasn't as if he'd ever felt like this was his home, even as a child. He'd always been the odd one out, never quite fitting in, never quite feeling like he was where he was meant to be. Until Darcy. Perhaps he was always meant to be with her.

And yet he had given her up, to save these people who would hate him if they knew what he was. Who would label him a monster.

He did not understand himself.-

There was a knocking on the door, and Loki rose from bed, splashing water on his face from the washbowl on the table. His eyes must surely be red, and not from being in his Frost Giant form- he would never wear that shape on Asgard.

In many respects, Asgard is as backward and stiff as medieval Europe. Beauty, titles, and honor- these are prized above all else. And elitism runs rampant. Being able to travel with ease by using his magic, Loki had seen many realms as he was growing up. But he was an exception, in many ways. He must be one of only a handful of Asgardians who had ever left the realm at all. The Bifrost was used mainly for commerce, and the average Asgardian only saw the fruits of that commerce down at the marketplace. And when there is such a disconnection like that, it is easy for people to begin to think themselves to be better than the nameless, faceless 'others'.

The war with Jotunheim so many years ago had only solidified their low opinion of Frost Giants even more than any others. Many had been lost in the war, and Frost Giants were hated. Murderers. Monsters. Thieves. And yet, it was all a bit like calling the kettle black. As if Asgard had been perfect. No, both sides had done things that were reprehensible. Back in Jotunheim, Asgardians were probably hated with the same fervor.

So no, Loki would never wear his Jotun form in Asgard, but he had barely been able to sleep, and his eyes showed it.

"Come in," he said, drying his face.

A beautiful, raven-haired woman opened the door. He sighed.

The past clung, no matter how much he tried to shake it off, and many of his most coveted wishes had hinged on this woman. Not so anymore, but the memories were many, and familiar- he had gone over them so many times when he'd been away from her, as if looking at them again might change them. Might make them into something that promised hope, instead of disgust and shame.

_"I like you're hair," Loki said, staring at the beautiful corn-silk locks. The sunlight hit them, making the gold in them shimmer and dance. It was entrancing. He wanted to touch it, but he was twelve years old, and he knew better._

_ She shot him a smile. "I know," she said. "It's my best feature. Not even Sigyn's hair is so nice." Sigyn was her best friend, and they were nearly inseparable. _

_ "Oh," Loki said. He hadn't really noticed Sigyn's hair before. "I li- I like all of you," he said, tripping on his tongue but determined to say it before he could lose his nerve._

_ She grinned then, pleased. "Good. It's important for family to get along, and we're going to be family."_

_ "We are?" He asked, confused. _

_ "Yes," she said, nodding. Her confidence was nearly as entrancing as her hair. "I'm going to marry your brother one day- and that means that you'll be _my_ brother."_

_ "Oh," Loki repeated, feeling very stupid. Of course she liked Thor. Girls _always_ liked Thor._

_ But he'd thought that maybe- maybe _this_ time it would be different. Maybe she would- and he felt so overwhelmingly idiotic all of a sudden, because the fact that she would like _him_ was just... Well. It was just so _childish_._

_ Who would ever like him? He was too pale and too gangly and his hair was too dark and he wasn't strong enough, and that wasn't even to mention the whole magic thing. Frigga had said not to use it, so it probably meant that there was something wrong with him that he had it to begin with._

_ 'I don't want to be your brother!' he wanted to shout. He just wanted...he wasn't sure. Maybe just a friend. Thor was great and all, but he just didn't _get_ Loki sometimes. And he was busy with all of his friends, so mostly Loki was left to his own devices. It was...lonely. And he really did like her- not just her hair. She was smart, and confident, and she got what she wanted._

_ "What?" She asked, having been distracted by the game Thor and his friends were playing at the edge of the park._

_ Maybe I just want to be wanted, Loki thought. Thor had his friends, his dad had the kingdom, Frigga had the court and her various projects, and what did Loki have?_

_ "Nothing," he said._

_ "Okay," she said distractedly. "Oh, look! There's Sigyn! I simply _must _tell her- I had the strangest dream. I'll see you later Loki." And she had bustled off, leaving Loki as he so often seemed to be._

_ Alone. _

"Sif," He said tonelessly. He did not want to deal with her right now.

She stared at him in open curiosity, as she had ever since the Bifrost stunt. Her wide, light brown eyes noting everything about him- _seeing_ him, in a way that he had once longed for more than anything else. Now it just made him uncomfortable, and annoyed.

"Good morning, Loki," she said, tilting her head as she studied him. "I'm sorry. Were you sleeping?"

"No," Loki said shortly, bristling when she nodded as if this confirmed her suspicion. He didn't like the idea of her thinking about him in _any_ way, let alone wondering if he'd slept. She'd had that chance a long time ago, and she'd spat in his face.

She blinked, a little hurt at his curtness and he had to suppress a snarl. She had done far worse to him, and three days of this moon-eyed calf-love thing that she'd been doing was enough for him to thank fate that she _hadn't_ liked him back. They would have made each other miserable.

"Odin wanted to see you," she said reproachfully. "Something about Baldr." She said the name with a curl to her lip, as if reluctant to allow him his name. There was much ill-will directed toward the long-lost son of Asgard, and Odin was doing little to stem it.

But perhaps Loki could _finally_ talk to Baldr now. He had many questions for him, but Odin had wanted to be present, and he'd been wrapped up in pressing affairs of the state. Asgard had been freaked by recent events and needed much assurance. Odin had been an unshakable and unquestionable ruler for so long that the recent events had been like a bucket of cold water, and Odin had been doing something of a tour around Asgard, showing that yes, everything was fine now, and not to panic.

"Now?" he asked.

Sif shrugged, her eyes lingering on his face for longer than Loki felt comfortable with. "If possible. Odin has another appointment soon, I believe."

Of course. Loki nodded to the door. "Shall we?"

Sif nodded regally, and turned, taking the lead. It was good that Thor had always seen her as a sister of sorts, because together Thor and Sif would have been even worse than Loki and her.

They walked in a charged silence for a moment- Loki almost daring her to say something, and Sif biting her tongue- before Sif turned off down another hallway, saying she had other business to attend to. Loki continued on to the dungeons, grateful to be rid of her. He _hated_ the way she looked at him.

_He hated the way she looked at him. As if, even when she was staring him in the face, she still saw the young, gangly boy, awkwardly confessing his admiration._

_ But Loki wasn't so young anymore. And he'd filled out a bit- had grown into himself. He was eighteen now. He was practically a man._

_ "You deserve someone who sees you," he said to her, noting the irony bitterly. He had long since begun to resent his infatuation with Sif. It had caused him little but pain, and yet it persisted._

_ Sif rubbed her palms over her eyes, trying to dry them. He wished he could pretend not to notice that she'd been crying- she hated showing weakness like that- but it was obvious. He'd followed her out to the gardens after Thor's ill-advised comment had sent her running from the dining room._

_ "But I want _him_!" she said despairingly, her words burrowing under Loki's skin like hot pokers. Her golden eyes gleamed up at him. And yet how could he not love her? Even the moon seemed to be in love with her, making her hair glow in the night, chasing shadows away from her face. "I want to be the one that he goes to for comfort." She laughed bitterly. "I even-" She shook her head at her own foolishness. " I even want to be the one who worries for him when he goes off to fight."_

_ Her eyes were full of a confusion of longing and embarrassment, and she smiled sadly. "So now you know," she said dully. "Now you know how pitiful I am."_

_ Loki swallowed. His own pain couldn't matter right now. He had to help her. He couldn't stand to see her like this._

_ "I don't think you're pitiful," he said. She sniffed._

_ "Really?" She asked hopefully._

_ "I think you're strong. In fact," he laughed shortly. "In fact, I think you wouldn't have to stay at home and worry for him at all- I think you could fight right alongside him, that's how strong you are." He hesitated, trying to figure out how to work it in. "In fact, I think we're both-"_

_ But she'd been distracted. "I could," she said, her eyes wide and hopeful. "I could do it, Loki- I could fight _with _him."_

_ Loki frowned. Oh. That hadn't been _quite_ what he'd meant-_

_ "He'd _have_ to notice me then!" Sif grinned, and kissed him on the cheek. "Thank you Loki! You always have the _best_ ideas. Thank you thank you thank you! You'll see- you'll be my brother yet."_

_ And then she was gone, whirling off, back into the dining hall- Loki left, once again, on his own._

_ But it was different now, he supposed. He was more used to it, anyways. What he'd used to call loneliness before, he'd begun calling solitude. Loneliness was something people had thrust upon them- but solitude. Solitude was something that people sought out. It was a choice. The distinction was very important to him._

_ So he decided to ignore the fact that Sif had left him, and told himself that, really, he'd been meaning to go back to his room anyways. There was much to learn, and no limits to stop him once he'd decided that Frigga would never love him. He was too different. And so he had learned to embrace what was shunned in him. _

_ If he had this magic, then he would bloody well figure out how to use it._

* * *

The dungeons were well lit and dry, elegant even. Like the rest of the palace, the ceiling was lofty, the pillars grand and cold, the tiled floor gleaming. A vivid contrast to the cliché dungeons of Midgardian films.

They were almost always empty- crime being an unusual thing- and only one cell was occupied at the moment.

The guards ignored him completely, as they had always done (and he had tried many pranks in his youth to try to shake their concentration), but now their attitude brought to mind the Buckingham Palace guards. He missed home.

"Ah, there you are," Odin said- his first words to Loki since the day of the attack- striding down the stairs and into the dungeons. He must not have been far behind Loki. "Let's make this quick."

Loki frowned. Not exactly the attitude he would expect from one about to interrogate their own son about why he had attempted to steal the throne.

Odin snapped his finger at a guard, and they quickly unlocked the cell. Loki and Odin entered.

Baldr had been sitting against the far wall on the mattress provided for a bed, his knees drawn up and his face resting on them, looking away from everyone. He didn't look up when they came in.

He was big- Thor's size, probably. But where Thor was blond and his hair hung to the top of his shoulders, Baldr had medium brown hair cropped close to his head. Loki studied him, curiously.

"You should kill me," he said dully.

Loki's brows shot up in surprise. This he had not been expecting.

"Yes," Odin agreed simply. Loki frowned. Odin looked about to say something else, but stopped himself. Instead he said, "And maybe I shall. But first I have questions for you."

"Ask them then," Baldr said. Loki was intrigued by his flippant demeanor.

"You tried to take my throne. Why?"

Baldr finally looked up, ashamed. "Because I am weak."

Loki snorted. "That's no answer."

"Laufey-"

"Start at the beginning," Loki said. It would eliminate many questions. "Is that the beginning?"

Baldr shook his head and glanced at Odin, whose face was hard and impassive. He swallowed, and turned back to Loki. It was hard to look at his...father. Too many questions. "Well, I live out in the Farlands. My par-" he broke off. "I was raised by a shepherd and a weaver- I am a shepherd, too. I was...happy. Or near enough, anyways. Then one day- not so long ago- it all...went wrong."

Odin listened, heart heavy with regret, though he was sure to keep his face unreadable. His poor, lost son. The things he did for his kingdom.

"I was in the fields, looking after the goats. It was a normal day. I was playing my flute when I saw a man appear out of nowhere on the horizon. I was astonished."

And well he should be, Loki thought. There were not many travelers through the Farlands, except on business with the locals. So what business a sorcerer could have there would be difficult to fathom for a shepherd.

"I watched with curiosity as the man drew closer, only to become alarmed when it became apparent that they were no man at all, but a great blue-"

"Frost Giant," Loki supplied rather sharply, hoping to cut off the word 'monster' before it came. It still nettled him to hear it, though he was angry to have such a pathetic weakness.

Baldr nodded, completely missing the sharpness of Loki's tone. It occurred to Loki that Baldr did not seem at all like an older brother, as Thor did, but more like a younger one. There was an incredible naivety about him- and a bizarre innocence in his plain, open face. It must have come from growing up in the Farlands, where life was much simpler. The honesty of him sat strangely though, because he looked so much the part of a warrior, with his big, muscled build and the hardness of his features.

Baldr coughed. "It was Laufey, of course, though I did not know it at the time. I was terrified," he admitted, embarrassed. "I had never even held a sword in my life before, but at that moment I longed for one. I thought he had come to kill me, and wondered what reason he could possibly have for wanting me dead."

He stood up, growing restless and pacing the small confines of the enclosure. As far as cells went, it was pretty nice. But a cell is a cell no matter how you dress it up. Loki and Odin sat at the small table in it's center, watching him. It was the first time his brother was seeing him, and the first time Baldr had seen him when he'd been conscious. He'd seen Odin a few times since being in the dungeon, but they'd never spoken. Odin had just come by his cell briefly and looked at him as if he was going to speak and then abruptly left.

"He wanted something entirely different though," he said. "He told me that I was a prince, cast out by my father like an unwanted dog- that it was only the good fortune of my- of my parents to find me. That I had been meant to die." He looked to Odin, hoping for some kind of response, but Odin stayed silent. Baldr smiled sadly. "And I...well, I was so bored with my life, and I was eager to believe him. Besides, I thought, what reason would he have to lie to me about this?" He laughed bitterly. "He told me that now was my chance- that he would help me take over the throne if I would just allow him access to the materials of Asgard during my reign. I accepted." Baldr rubbed his hand over his neck, looking away. "I was a fool, and greedy. I was swept up in the fairytale-ness of it. So I came with him to the palace, and he got us inside, to your chambers," he said, looking at Loki. "And I was supposed to get rid of you, so I knocked you out, and then...well...I mean, I couldn't _kill_ you. I'm just not- I don't- I'm not a violent person by nature, really. So I sent you off to that other world with new memories. You were already asleep," Baldr said, looking at Odin. "So I didn't need to think about you just then. The Tesseract's power would help others accept me as king, and so only those who were closest to the throne needed to be gotten rid of, Laufey had said. It was just the queen left then..." he trailed off, remembering her. The way she had looked at him- as if she loved him. _"I know you,"_ she'd said, her hand to her mouth.

"Yes," Odin said harshly. "Your mother. You know she has longed for you ever since the day we sent you away? And how do you repay her? She is in Jotunheim, for the love of the gods!"

Baldr winced. "I know this! You think I do not know this? She was never meant to be a part of this! I was going to send her to that other world as well!" He sighed, running a hand through his short hair. "It was Laufey- he didn't trust me. Said he wanted insurance that I would hold up my part of the deal." He shook his head. "He is a good judge of character, Laufey. I was already starting to feel something was wrong. I was already wishing to back out of the arrangement. But he had Frigga, and I was trapped." He looked at Odin again. "Until you woke up."

"Yes. You made a horrendous miscalculation of my strength," Odin said, sneering. "It was child's play to take you down."

Baldr shrugged, unashamed by the reminder of his failure. "I know." He was actually incredibly relieved. He was not king material. He knew this now.

"But I don't understand," Loki broke in. "You used the Tesseract to wipe our memories. But how did you know how to use it? It is vastly complex-" _That _was an understatement. "The result of the knowledge and power of the ages, and you who lived your life as a _shepherd _could understand it?" Loki scoffed. "There is no way."

Baldr looked at him. It had been the strangest thing when he'd beheld the Tesseract. Like it had called out to him as a friend. It had glowed like a star, beckoning him forward, the scent of geraniums... "I don't know. I just looked at it, and I knew."

Loki frowned. That was...impossible. "You just knew," he echoed skeptically.

"Back to the matter at hand though, Loki, if you please," Odin snapped. He didn't think he could take much more of this. Guilt made him angry. "I would like to get your mother back as soon as possible. If you'll remember, she's still in _Jotunheim_. And now that you've gone and blown up the Bifrost I have to figure out another way to get her."

"Of course," Loki said, annoyed. Jeez. His question had been a good one. And at the time, it had been pretty necessary to destroy the Bifrost. Not that he'd gotten any thanks.

"What I'd like to know is _how_ Laufey was traveling to Asgard in the first place," Odin mused sharply. "He should not have been able to, because he wasn't using the Bifrost. And unless he was travelling through _Yggdrasill's_ roots, that means that one of the Artifacts must be unaccounted for."

There were many Artifacts created in one of the eight other worlds, and all had some kind of power or special element. Many were in Odin's treasury, safely away from those who would use them against Asgard, spoils of past wars and the wealth of Asgard. Most of the others were hoarded jealously by the Dwarves and Elves, who had a tentative alliance with Asgard. But there were always some that would be unaccounted for.

"How would Laufey have been able to get his hands on one, being trapped on Jotunheim as he ought to have been?" Odin asked, staring hard at Baldr, who paled under the look.

"I do not know," he stuttered. "I swear it. I did not even have much contact with him, and he certainly never told me of his plans."

Odin narrowed his eyes at Baldr, but accepted this. He looked at Loki, who- much to Odin's past despair- knew much of the Artifacts, being quite in love with all things magic.

Loki thought, going through the list of Artifacts and their qualities in his head. "We know he can teleport with it, but beyond that, we don't know anything else, yes?" He didn't wait for an answer. "It is difficult to say what it is at this point then. There are few Artifacts with the power to teleport their owners, and the ones I know of are in the Elves' treasuries. Except..." he trailed off, remembering and feeling like the biggest idiot that he could have allowed for something like this to happen. "Umm. Except that there is that ring in your treasury. The Galaxy Ring. And...ah. Well."And now it was time to own up to his colossal mistake. He did not like eating crow at all. "There's the slight chance that I may have inadvertently allowed for a few Frost Giants to disrupt Thor's coronation ceremony, and that perhaps he may have maybe been able to then get into the treasury and...borrow some stuff."

It was almost comical to watch Odin's face just getter redder and redder as Loki kept talking. Almost.

"You _WHAT_?" He bellowed.

"I said _maybe_! It's still possible that someone entirely different is aiding him, maybe one of the fire elves or something, I mean, let's face it, we've got some enemies..."

"LOKI-"

"Well, maybe if you weren't so fucking skilled at pissing people off then we wouldn't be in this mess! You know? You're really aggravating sometimes, Odin, and I can't say as I really blame a lot of our enemies for disliking us when you've been behaving like an ass for years and treating everyone like you don't love them very much, if you even do at all, and just what's so bad about Frost Giants, anyways-?!"

* * *

Darcy stared at the pregnancy test. And kept staring.A small smile started on her lips and grew into a huge grin.

"Oh," she said. "This is..." incredibly surprising, and slightly overwhelming, but not at all unwelcome. "Not exactly expected."

"Mommy," Nathan's voice came from the other side of the bathroom door.

She checked her watch. Eleven p.m. He should have been asleep already because she'd finished putting him to bed an hour ago, but he'd been having trouble sleeping lately. So had she, for that matter.

"Just a minute, honey," she said, looking at the pregnancy test for a long moment before throwing it away and washing her hands. She was going to be having another baby! The thought made her heart soar.

From the corner of her eye she saw her reflection in the mirror, and stopped to stare. She had gotten older. Not _that_ old, she told herself. And she was still gorgeous, of course (_thank you self-confidence, I do so love you,_ she thought). But she would be thirty this year. When had that happened!? When had she gotten middle-aged? It felt like just last year that she'd been working down in New Mexico for Jane, not really expecting too much out of life. And then in had waltzed Loki, and it had all changed. Ever since that her future had been set- she'd known her life would be forever entwined with his. She'd always scoffed at the idea of 'true love', but...he was the man for her. There could never be another. She knew it all the way down to her bones.

Shaking her head, she turned away from the mirror and opened the door. Nathan stood in the hallway, his young face so serious, and his eyes wide and unhappy.

"Honey, what is it?" Darcy asked, concerned.

"I can't sleep," he said, looking up at her. "It's too scary."

Darcy's heart ached for him. The poor boy. She hated for him to be afraid, and it was the hardest thing- to try and change a child's mind once they got an idea in their head. He was convinced that because his dad wasn't around anymore, that monsters wouldn't be too afraid to hide in his closet. Normally she would try and find a way of explaining that no, it was really okay because _, but tonight...she was so tired all of a sudden- happy, but tired- and she couldn't find the energy to look for an explanation that he might accept.

"Come on then, scamp," she said, herding him into her and Loki's room. "You can sleep with me for tonight."

Nathan brightened a little, and she knew that she would have to watch for this now- he would be trying to sleep in her room all the time, now that she'd set a precedent for it. She sighed quietly, amused despite herself. Being a parent was such a tightrope to walk. Raising a child could be exhausting, raising two children...well, hopefully they'd tire each other out.

"I've already read you your bedtime story, so it's time for sleep right away, okay?"

Nathan nodded, yawning. Darcy smiled slightly. She wondered how he was still going- he got up by seven every morning without fail, bright and chipper as the devil, meaning today he'd been awake for about sixteen hours. That was a very long day for him.

"Okay," he mumbled, getting in bed and burrowing under the covers.

Darcy smiled. He was the cutest thing. She turned the light off and got into bed herself, and Nathan snuggled up against her.

"I love you, mommy," he mumbled sleepily.

It was funny- as much work and exasperation children could be, then there were these little moments of them being their perfect little selves. There could never be a time when Darcy would believe Nathan wasn't worth all the work. And bringing another child into their little family...well, she would love that.

"I love you too, baby," she said, kissing his forehead. "Now go to bed."


	6. Chapter 5

_**As of 12/18/2012: **This chapter has been updated._

* * *

Darcy kept the fact that she was pregnant to herself for the next month. It was still so soon, and it felt almost too good to be true. She would tell everyone soon enough. For the time being it was just her little secret. She found herself just smiling at nothing sometimes, imagining how perfect this baby was going to be.

It was July now, and her days were filled with adventures by the water. Normally she liked summer, but this one felt hotter than normal and there was a nice lake about an hour away that she and Nathan (accompanied sometimes by Jane and the boys) would spend the day at. Nathan loved it. He wasn't quite swimming yet, so she had to keep quite a close eye on him, but he loved being in the water with her. She would take him out to where the water was about waist-deep on her and help him swim. Or they would sit in the shallows and play games, or build sandcastles. Usually by the middle of the day he was tired out and they would go into the shaded part of the beach where he would nap for a few hours while Darcy would sketch out ideas for her book, or would read. It was a good way to spend the summer.

So July passed and August started, and with it was Darcy's fourth month of pregnancy. The fourth month came with more than just a few more pounds, and ultimately was what led to Darcy telling Thor and Jane that she was pregnant. Nathan had remarked on it first, one night when she was kissing him goodnight.

"Mommy," he'd said, shrinking away from her and frowning. "How come you feel so cold?"

Confused, Darcy had held a hand to her forehead. It felt normal to her, so she'd held a hand to Nathan's forehead, thinking maybe he was coming down with something.

"Oh, honey!" She'd exclaimed. "You're hotter than a prairie desert on fire, honey."

Nathan shook his head at her. "Mommy, I don't understand you," he said. He often said this. Darcy wondered what it would be like when he started to understand her humor. "And anyways," he said with great authority, "_I'm_ fine. It's _you_ who's so cold."

"Yeah, yeah," Darcy said. It was difficult to argue with kids, because they were not hindered by inconvenient things like accuracy, or logic. She came back a moment later with a thermometer and took his temperature.

"Hmm," she said. Nathan raised his brows, as if to say _see?_ "Okay, okay." She washed it off and took her own temperature. "Oh. Well, fu-" she broke off, remembering that Nathan was right there. "-uuuuuuuu...n. Fun. So it looks like you were right, which is...fun, for you."

Nathan smiled, happy to be right and not really thinking about what it would mean that his mother's temperature was much lower than his own. But Darcy was thinking about it, and about how Loki was a god. So was this a normal thing when people were pregnant with the child of an Asgardian god? Darcy had no clue, but she meant to find out.

* * *

So Odin was mad at Loki. Again. Basically, it was business as usual for the two of them. Odin hadn't been appreciative of being yelled at, especially in front of guards and Baldr, and Loki was still just angry about the normal things. He had daddy issues, he knew. Probably he should be in therapy, he admitted, but Asgard was so far from having or even considering having therapists that the idea was laughable. He could just imagine how that would go.

"So I've been feeling murderous impulses towards my father," he would say, lying on a couch.

Heimdall's eyes would get huge (it was always Heimdall that Loki imagined to be the therapist in these little daydreams) and he would call for the guards, immediately sentencing Loki to death. Their therapy session would be over before Loki could explain that of course he would never _act_ on those impulses, and nor did he really want his father _dead_. Odin was just such a..._butt_.

He still could not flash, and his fury with his past teacher grew and grew. One of these days she would be made to regret taking what was his. He would make sure that she suffered as he was suffering.

But flashing to Midgard was out of the picture for now. So instead, he needed to...rebuild the Bifrost.

It had actually been Baldr who suggested that he do that. It was embarrassing to admit it, but Loki had actually pretty much been moping since getting stuck on Asgard. There was a lot of theorizing about what Laufey's next move would be and preparing for that, but Odin pretty much had that in hand, so Loki was kind of left on his own.

It was strange- he'd always been on his own before. He'd never had trouble keeping himself busy. There was always another spell to learn. Always another prank to pull. But for the past couple years he'd had Darcy, and Nathan, and so much of his time and energy had been spent being part of a team. Now he felt adrift. He had no interest in practicing spells that could not bring him home. And he was a father now- he didn't even _want_ to pull pranks. They seemed unbelievably childish and unnecessary. Revenge- perhaps. But pranks? No.

There were always people milling about court, and he was their favorite subject. The women tittered behind his back while the men gave him a wide berth and suspicious looks. The Warriors Three were off doing jobs for Odin, and so the only person at court he really knew was Sif. And he did _not_ want to deal with her.

So he ended up spending a lot of the time visiting Baldr, who turned out to be quite helpful and likable. By the second time Loki had seen him, he'd known they could be friends.

It had been about a week that Loki had been on Asgard, and he was visiting Baldr as he normally would every day for a few hours and the subject of his time on Midgard had come up.

"I'm sorry, you know," Baldr had said. "About sending you to Midgard for so long. I didn't...ah...mean anything by it."

Loki had shrugged it off. "I know. I hold no grudge. Being on Earth was actually the best thing that could have possibly happened to me- so really, I should be thanking you."

"_Thanking me?_"

"Yeah. I...uh." Loki had smiled, remembering how he'd met Darcy, when he'd thought he was just a scientist. The first time he'd seen her, he'd known she was something special. And, incredibly, she'd thought that _he_ was special, too. "I met a girl."

"Really?" Baldr had asked, intrigued. "What is she like?"

Loki had laughed. "She's..." he could never find the right words to describe Darcy. She had something _more_ than anyone else he'd ever met. An inner light that shone out brightly, inviting him to come share in the joys of life with her. "Well, she's funny, and kind, and ridiculous, and..." His smile had faded. "We're married," He'd admitted. "And we have a son."

Baldr had beamed at him, his open face clearly relieved and pleased. "Loki, that is wonderful news! I must say, I am relieved to hear that you fared well."

Loki had just frowned at him. "Not so wonderful, Baldr. The Bifrost is broken, and now I cannot teleport. There is no way home, back to them." He had looked away, a sharp sting in his eyes. "I am alone."

Baldr had laughed. And laughed.

"Oy!" Loki exclaimed. "What's so funny?"

"What is this?" Baldr asked merrily. "The infamous Loki, just giving up? I don't believe it for a minute. Even in the Farlands we heard tell of your mischief. You have a quick mind, brother. I have every faith that you'll figure something out."

And that, thankfully, had jarred Loki out of his melancholy. Baldr was right- of course Baldr was right. He was Loki! The God of Mischief! He would not be defeated. He would do the impossible- what none had done for an age. He would rebuild the Bifrost.

Even if he wasn't exactly sure how just yet.

* * *

"So," Darcy said the next day as she, Jane and Thor sat at their kitchen table. The boys were playing happily in the living room. She took a deep breath. "I'm pregnant," she announced dramatically.

Jane gasped, a great smile spreading over her face. "Oh my god!" She cried. "That's amazing!" She frowned, sensing Darcy's hesitation and lack of excitement. "Isn't it?"

"Yes!" Darcy said. "Of course! I would love another baby! Except..." She bit her lip. How was she supposed to say this? "I...ah...I don't think the baby is completely...erm. Well, Loki _is_ a god," she trailed off.

Thor frowned, uncomprehending.

"But the boys are all fine," Jane said reassuringly, understanding Darcy's fear for the baby. Then Jane frowned. "So far, that is. But I'm sure there will be nothing to worry about," she finished brightly.

"Well," Darcy continued doubtfully, "see, because here's the thing- I mean maybe it's not a big deal, but it definitely didn't happen with Nathan- I'm...my skin is...cold." She made a face. Well. That just sounded stupid.

They both just looked at her, not getting it.

"What do you mean cold?" Jane asked.

"I mean, _cold_. Nathan said- or, actually. Here," she said, holding her hand out. "Apparently you'll be able to feel it."

Jane and Thor shared a look, and Darcy felt absolutely ridiculous, but she needed answers and Thor was her best bet. Jane humored her and reached out to touch her arm.

"Oh!" She exclaimed, surprised. "You _are_ cold," she said and and looked at Darcy curiously. "I wonder why..." she murmured, clearly lost in theories for the moment.

Frowning at Jane's reaction, Thor touched her arm too, jolting similarly at the shock. But it was more than that- there was a look in his eyes that gave Darcy hope: there was recognition.

Thor looked Darcy over carefully, trying to notice any subtle changes that might explain it, but she looked the same. The simplest answer seemed the most likely.

"I think the baby is a Frost Giant," he said finally.

"A _what_!?" Darcy asked, choking on her water.

"A Frost Giant," Thor said again. "At least, part Frost Giant. You did not know that Loki was a Frost Giant?" Darcy could only stare at him in confusion. Thor coughed. "Ah. Well, yes. He is. And it appears that, for whatever reason, the babe you carry shares more of his DNA than Nathan."

Darcy shook her head, trying to clear it. "I'm sorry. But what? I thought he was Asgardian, or whatever. What the fuck is a _Frost_ Giant? I'm guessing it's not exactly Jack Frost with a beanstalk."

"Well," Thor said, ignoring her last comment, "He _is_ Asgardian. At heart, at least. He was raised to be such- but he is a halfling. The product of a Frost Giant father and Asgardian mother, adopted by my father and raised with me as a prince of Asgard." Darcy listened with fascination. "A Frost Giant is a monstrous being, most at least fifteen feet tall. They have blue skin, and they live in the frozen wastelands of Jotunheim."

"But...Loki doesn't have blue skin," Darcy pointed out with a frown.

Thor shrugged. "It must be because of his Asgardian mother. I'm sorry- I wish I knew more, but that's much of what I know of them."

Darcy took a few minutes to digest this new information. She put her hand on her stomach. "So...this baby," she swallowed. "Will they be blue?"

"Doubtful," Jane said reassuringly. "If Loki isn't and half of his genes are Frost Giant, then the baby shouldn't because they only have a quarter of those genes."

"Right," Darcy said, nodding. Okay. Okay, she could deal with this. At least something wasn't _wrong_. That was really what had worried her- the fact that she might lose the baby.

"If I had to guess," Jane said a little timidly, "I would say that your body is reacting to the needs of the baby. That- maybe it needs a colder environment to grow, and so your body is lowering it's temperature to accommodate it?" she finished doubtfully, frowning at the idea.

"That...would make sense," Darcy said, thinking about it. She wrinkled her nose. "But is my body really that smart?" She asked, similarly filled with doubt.

Jane shrugged helplessly. "Maybe? I don't really know. I'm sorry."

"No, no that's fine," Darcy said with a distracted smile. "It's an interesting theory. But okay, what about this. What about Nathan? Why wasn't his pregnancy like that then? I wasn't cold with him like I am now. What's the difference?"

"I don't know," said Thor, feeling very out of place in this conversation. He knew next to nothing about Frost Giants, and even less when it came to pregnancy.

Jane shrugged again. "How far along are you? Do you know when you conceived?" She asked, wanting to get more information so she could form a clearer picture of the situation.

Darcy nodded. She'd thought about this already, and, counting the number of cycles she had missed and factoring in that she was pretty regular...

"It would have been within a few days of him leaving."

She gasped, remembering something. "I can't believe I forgot! He'd had an appointment to go see a doctor that week, because he'd been feeling off. Like nightmares and stuff. And he'd been cold, too. His skin, I mean. _He_ hadn't been feeling the cold at all. Maybe- maybe _that's_ why this baby is different?" Darcy asked, unsure. "Because something was happening with Loki?"

"It's possible," Jane said.

They all just stared at each other for a moment, thinking of what it meant that Darcy was pregnant with a Frost Giant. How would they keep it safe? What would it need? Would it be able to do anything alarming?

"Wow," Darcy breathed, a little overwhelmed by the hugeness of it all.

Jane squeezed her hand. "Don't worry, Darcy," she said. "Whatever happens, we'll be here for you."

"Yes," Thor agreed. "I will try to aid you in whatever way I can." It would be quite limited though, sadly. He had only knowledge to offer, and not much at that. He didn't actually know all that much about Frost Giants- it being something he'd never thought worth his time. He regretted it now, of course, and wished he would be able to be more helpful for Darcy.

Darcy teared up a little at that. "Thank you," she said, from the bottom of her heart. "I don't know what I would do without you. Really- it means so much to me that you guys are so supportive and everything." If she had to go through this alone...whoa. That would be a whole new level of terrifying.

"Hey," Jane said, smiling. "That's what family's for."

* * *

A few days later Darcy and Nathan were driving out to the lake again. The windows were rolled down a little to get some breeze, and the clean scent of pine drifted through the car. Darcy thanked her lucky stars that even though they lived in Boston, they were still quite close to a good lake.

She had decided that it was about time that she'd broached the subject of siblings with Nathan. A few different ways had come to mind about how to do this, but she figured the best way would be to just bring it up as a done thing and not make a big deal out of it.

She paused the CD that was playing Pete Seeger songs.

"So," she said. "So, buddy."

"I want more music," Nathan said, grinning in a 'please give me what I want because I'm so cute' way, which she could only see from the corner of her eye as she was driving. But she knew the look well. He'd used it to great effect most of his life.

"In a minute, scallywag. I just wanted to let you know something though. You know how your cousins are babies?"

"Yeah," Nathan said in a superior voice. "They're _babies_. Not like me. I'm a _big_ kid. I don't even wet the bed anymore."

Darcy laughed. He was a funny little guy. "Well, sometimes," she reminded him.

He rolled his eyes. "Well..._yeah_."

"But not that often," Darcy amended to pacify him.

He sniffed. "Barely even."

"Right," she smiled. "Well, it turns out I'm pregnant. So that means there's going to be a baby just like your cousins in the house. How does that sound?"

"Ugh! Mom, they're gonna chew _everything,_" he whined. "They can't come in _my_ room. I don't want them to eat my toys."

He said it with such acceptance and aggravation that Darcy couldn't help it. She busted out laughing again. Nathan gave her a look of long-sufferance.

"Oh, Nathan, you are the sweetest, most wonderful boy in the world," she said. "If I wasn't driving a car right now, I would kiss you on your beautiful little forehead. Here's an air kiss instead though: mwah!" She made a smacking sound and blew the kiss in his direction.

"Ew," Nathan grimaced. "Mommy, I'm too big for kisses."

Darcy laughed. "Oh you. Oh you hilarious little big kid. You are such a funny guy- did you know that?"

"Yes."

"Ha. Hahaha," she laughed sarcastically. "_No one_'s too big for kisses. You'll find that out when you get older. But that's not for a long time, so no one's going to freak out about that for another few years." She was _not _looking forward to him hitting puberty. What did _she_ know about adolescent boys? Well, Loki would be back by then, for sure, so she supposed she shouldn't even think about it.

Nathan shook his head. "Mommy," he said. "I don't understand you."

"I know, kiddo," she smiled. "Don't worry about it. All will become clear. You got your hilariousness from me, you know. You'll find that out when you get older."

They spent the rest of the ride singing along to Pete Seeger, Darcy feeling lighthearted and happier than she'd been in months. Everything was going to work out, and she had a baby to look forward to. It didn't even hurt so much anymore that Loki was gone. The future was full of bright things.

* * *

"Mommy, take this and put it in your bag," Nathan demanded a few hours later. Darcy had been laying in the shade daydreaming a little while keeping an eye on him. He'd come running up to her with what turned out to be a shiny white pebble and given it to her.

"Oh, this is pretty. What do you want to do with this? Are you starting a pebble collection?"

Nathan rolled his eyes. "No, mommy. It's for the baby. Put it in your bag, kay? I don't want you to forget it."

She raised her eyebrows at his bossy tone and smiled. "Okay, okay. I'm putting it in my bag. No forgetting will be happening."

"Good. Because _last_ time_-"_

Darcy groaned. "I know. I know. I said I would bring the book and I forgot. I'm sorry."

"Yeah. Exactly."

"Oh-ho-ho, Mr. Snarky Pants over here."

Nathan frowned. "Mr. what?"

She scooped him up and blew a raspberry on his belly and he shrieked with laughter. He had a very ticklish belly. "Mr. Snarky Pants," Darcy repeated, setting him down.

He grinned, his whole face lit up with happiness. "Mommyyyyy! I don't understand. I'ma go make a sandcastle."

"And I'm going to help you," she announced. The sun made her so sleepy, but she couldn't fall asleep here with Nathan so close to water. It was about time that she had some activity.

"Wheeeee!" Nathan shouted, pretending he was an airplane as he zoomed off to the part of the beach with better sandcastle-sand.

Darcy followed after him, breathing in the fresh piney air of the lake and thinking that in a year she would be back here again, but with a new addition to the family in tow. The thought made her grin, her heart feeling pretty damn full.


	7. Chapter 6

_**As of 12/18/2012:** This chapter has been updated._

* * *

Darcy was now six months along. September had come along out of the blue. Nathan had started going to preschool at the beginning of the month and it was hard for Darcy to adjust. Nathan adapted right away, happy to meet new friends. He was always a social little boy, and he enjoyed preschool quite a lot. But Darcy struggled with this new thing about not being with him all the time. His preschool ended at two, so she now had about seven hours without him that she didn't really know what to do with.

The house was so quiet when he wasn't there. She'd taken to putting music on quietly just so there wasn't complete silence. It was good for her concentration- she'd finished a significant part of her current book and had sent it off to her editor to look over. Aside from that, she found herself not really liking all the downtime, though the other benefit was that it had led to her reading a lot. She'd been pouring over Norse mythology, devouring anything she could get her hands on. The problem was, she didn't know how much to believe- if any, because the Loki of the books was completely different from the Loki that she knew- and so she would cross-question Thor. A lot of the time though, the questions she was most interested in, he didn't know the answer to. The poor guy- he was always so apologetic about it.

"If this baby is part Frost Giant," she asked, "what does that mean about it's life span? Will it look human? Loki does, but he has magic, right? Will the baby have magic? What if it's going to need to be in a really cold environment?"

Her pregnancy was definitely weird. The biggest thing was that the baby had somehow lowered her temperature- as if it needed to be at a lower temperature to form, but also knew that it needed to keep it's mother alive. Darcy herself didn't feel like she was cold, but she couldn't touch Nathan now except with gloves, because he complained that she was freezing. Thor was as flabbergasted as her as to how such a thing was possible.

Jane had said what they'd all been thinking: "Darcy, I don't know how you're still alive, honestly. With a temperature so low, by all rights you should be dead."

But she wasn't. She felt fine.

The other thing was that the baby had already started kicking. With Nathan that hadn't started until a month or two later, which meant that this baby was developing faster. It was anyone's guess when she would be due because of this. She was afraid to go to a doctor, or even to consult a midwife, because, like Jane said, she shouldn't even be alive. There would be far too many questions.

She hadn't told her parents yet, either. She kept putting it off. They'd been so upset that they'd missed Nathan's birth that they would certainly want to come up for this baby's. But Darcy didn't know what this birth was going to be like, or what the baby would even _look_ like, and as few people as possible should be in the know about all this god stuff, anyways. Darcy hadn't even told them that Loki was gone yet. Well, kind of. She'd said that he'd been called away for a sciencey thing over in Oregon and that he'd be gone for a while.

It was funny- well, not really funny- more like odd and disconcerting- how she wouldn't think about Loki for a week maybe, and then something would remind her of him and bam! all the heartache and sadness of him being gone would come rushing back. It wasn't the sadness that was disconcerting though- it was the fact that she would go a week or two without thinking of him at all. How could she even _do _that? she would question herself when she remembered. He was _Loki_. He was without a doubt the love of her life...and she just, what? Didn't think about him for days on end? What was wrong with her?

Nathan wasn't talking about him much, either, but he was _four_. He had a short memory. It wasn't as if he had forgotten his father, but he wasn't seeing him every day. So he just wasn't something that Nathan thought about much.

* * *

Loki, on the other hand, thought about Nathan and Darcy all the time. It was what fueled him to keep going. It was exhausting and for the most part, unrewarding, work to rebuild the Bifrost. There was a reason only one had been built. It was fucking hard to do.

He was working on the frame for the Bifrost first, because the Bifrost was really basically pure energy, contained. And what was he supposed to do with the pure energy if it didn't have a frame to contain it?

The frame was an intricate thing though, and he was going off of memory because the old one had completely shattered. This meant it was all by trial and error, and it was frustrating. And Heimdall, who could have helped him, was sulking. Well, okay, not sulking. He was absolutely furious at Loki for destroying what he was meant to guard, and it was only because Odin had ordered him not to that Heimdall hadn't pummeled Loki into next week.

It had dawned on him, too, that for his whole madcap idea of rebuilding the Bifrost to actually work, he would have to be able to get to Jotunheim to actually acquire the pure Energy needed, and that could only be found in the heart of the mountains of Jotunheim.

And the more he thought about the Bifrost, the more problems he encountered with it. For instance, the Bifrost and the Tesseract, and probably a few other Artifacts, were made with the pure Energy found on Jotunheim. But the Frost Giants got their power from the Tesseract, rather than the _pure energy_ of their realm? That meant that there was something even more unique about the Tesseract (and the Bifrost, by extension) than Loki had thought.

"Motherfucker," Loki swore as he accidentally hit his finger with the hammer.

He'd tried using magic to cut the wood, but the results had been too askew. The frame needed to be made of Dwarven wood (as Heimdall had finally told him after days of building with Asgardian wood), and Dwarven wood was enchanted in such a way that it really had to be handcrafted. One of their little jokes. Dwarven wood (and coal, and stone, and other such building materials) was famed for it's stellar durability and magical properties. But Dwarfs are greedy creatures, and they are loathe to part with things. So to make it more palatable, they enchanted their products so that the owner would have to build with their own hands.

"Bloody little bastards," he grumbled under his breath, getting the nail in and standing back to look at his work with a critical eye. It was so close. But not...quite. "Argh! I may as well be trying to eat the moon!" His heart gave a little throb at the expression he'd adopted from Darcy. A slow (but determined) reader, she was wont to use it when starting a new book.

Despite a few more injuries and snide looks from Heimdall, who watched but refused to help (the lazy swine), it was coming together. A pretty solid frame was mostly built.

In other news, the Warriors Three had tried to adopt him into their social circle. Which was...strange. As children, the Three had picked on him. There had been no love lost between them. But they were different now. A little more mature, a little more confident in who they were. Perhaps they could now afford to be kinder. And it didn't hurt that his manner of return had made him into something of a celebrity.

During the day it was pretty fend-for-yourself at the palace unless you wanted to order something in particular to be sent to your room, but dinners were a formal occasion. The Warriors Three had taken to sitting at the end Loki did when he managed to remember about dinner, and they would try and coax him into telling them stories about Midgard, and Thor, and the kids.

Loki was both eager and reluctant to share these details. He wanted to tell everyone how amazing his family was, and share all the wonderful things about them, but at the same time he also wanted to keep them for himself- as if to tell people about them would make them less his. Except with Baldr, who Loki had grown quite close to.

So with the Warriors Three, he'd settled for misdirecting the conversations to Midgardian customs and quirks- like Christmas, movies, comedians, cars... and then of course, their favorite subjects: themselves.

Loki and Odin hadn't really been talking since their fight. Not that they talked much normally, but their was a definite tension between them. When it came to his father, Loki was man enough to admit that he had a lot of issues- and while he understood Odin's side, it pissed him off royally that Odin couldn't understand _his_.

Odin had been very busy, as ever. He was always in a meeting or off to another one. Though he didn't speak of it again, Loki knew that every day knowing Frigga was trapped in Jotunheim was abhorrent to him. He'd had the treasury thoroughly searched, and there was no sign of the Galaxy Ring. Other Artifacts that could teleport their owners were nowhere to be seen- and Loki vaguely remembered hearing a while back that the Light Elves had hoarded a bunch of them up somewhere, so the chances that there was one just bobbing around somewhere in Asgard were slim.

Odin had made it quite clear that he was counting on Loki to find a way to get Frigga back, which put even more pressure on Loki. Loki thought that perhaps Odin blamed him for the whole thing in some way, though why Odin would think that he had no idea. In this one case, Loki was actually quite blameless.

Odin had tried to give Loki a whole bunch of people to help him with the Bifrost so it could be done faster, but Loki had refused the help. He was the only one who even vaguely knew what needed to happen. Directing others who had no clue would have been more of a hindrance. Annoyingly, it had taken Odin a long (and _loud_) while to accept this.

And all the while there was the threat of Laufey hanging silently over all of their heads. They knew Laufey could still get to Asgard with the Galaxy Ring, though he hadn't attacked again yet. Because of this, Loki was guessing that the Ring could only transport it's bearer- making it quite ill-suited for launching an attack. It was disconcerting nonetheless, to know that he _could_ pop up at any moment.

His sleep was light and fitful, his dreams full of strange, half-memories where he was the cause of Darcy suffering.

He would wake up from those feeling nauseous and exhausted, which didn't help his efforts with the Bifrost.

* * *

"Mommy, look!" Nathan held up a floral-print baby dress. "We should get one for the baby."

Darcy smiled. "We don't know if it's a girl though, Nate." Thor and Jane had agreed that it was probably not such a great idea to get outside help if possible. She was eight months along now, and so far there hadn't been any new developments. All in all, she was feeling pretty serene about the whole Frost Giant baby thing.

Nathan rolled his eyes. "Who _cares_? Boys could wear dresses too, you know. I like the flowers on it."

"True," Darcy conceded. She loved the way kids thought sometimes. Still unblemished by society. "You are one smart little boy, you know that?" She ruffled his hair and he made a face and leaned away.

"I know."

They had gone shopping for baby clothes, because Darcy and Loki had given away all of what Nathan had worn when he was a baby. They hadn't really been planning on a second child.

"Those are some pretty kick-ass flowers, too. Those are flowers that really say: 'I may be a baby, but underestimate me and I will cry in your face until you do what I want."

Nathan frowned. "Mom, babies_ always_ cry. Liam never shuts _up_," he huffed.

"Well," Darcy said archly, "not me. I was a very dignified baby. I only cried at weddings."

Nathan just looked at her for a moment, said, "I don't understand you," and then turned back to the baby clothes with a serious expression on his face.

Darcy looked at the ceiling (a surprisingly nice pale blue) and sighed. "I am unappreciated. But that's the curse of the humorous, I suppose. Forever misunderstood. Ah well." Loki would have laughed, she thought fleetingly.

She put the dress back. She was all for gender-choice and all that, but it was winter, after all. So dresses weren't going to be the most practical thing.

The fall had gone by so quickly! Honestly, she felt like it had been no time at all since she'd found out she was pregnant, and now here it was- the beginning of December. Life was moving so fast! Her latest book had been published and was doing fairly well, and she had gotten an idea for another one that she was currently exploring. She had finally gotten used to having the mornings to herself, and she'd become quite productive. The first few hours of the morning were for writing, and then she would clean, or catch up on phone calls/bills/errands/etc, or watch a little TV if she didn't have something else to do. Then she would go get Nathan and depending on the day they would go see Jane and the boys, or Nathan would have a swim class, art class, play-date...there weren't a lot of gaps in her time. Before she knew it, it had started getting chillier, and then just after Thanksgiving it had snowed for the first time and it had officially been winter.

One of the perks of this pregnancy was that she didn't feel the cold at all. The downside being that it had become harder to judge how to appropriately have Nathan dressed, meaning she erred on the side of caution and he sometimes ended up taking off a layer or two in protest.

Sadly, she had to wear two layers of thin gloves pretty much all the time now so she could still touch people, which was annoying as fuck. Her temperature had lowered even more, causing her to look paler than normal, and now when she held an un-gloved hand to the window it started frosting over ever so slightly. Bit freaky, but also a bit cool.

As far as a due date went, no one knew for sure. Normally it would be early to mid January, but this baby seemed to be developing faster, so it was pretty up in the air. The plan was that she would give birth at home, with Jane helping, who had actually taken a few nursing classes over the years and felt pretty okay about being useful. Thor would probably be with the kids, trying to distract them from the fact that a baby was being born at their house.

Ironically, Darcy felt much calmer this time around than she had the first time when she'd thought she'd been so prepared and things had kind of fallen apart, only to work out in the end. But this time, despite the unknown factors, she was serene. The baby would come when it came, in whatever way it would, and then she would figure out what to do about raising them.

The bigger problem of the moment was her parents- specifically her mother. She'd finally gone ahead and told them that she was pregnant. They reacted as she'd expected they would- excited and eager, and then confused (and on her mother's part, annoyed) that she'd waited so long before telling them. And neither understood how Loki could be away from her for it, even if he was on an important job for the next few months.

"So you'll be due in January, then," her mother had said over the phone. "A bit unfortunate, that. Wouldn't it be nice to have a Christmas baby? And then of course, it's harder for your father to get time off of work in January. But not to worry! We wouldn't miss this for the world."

"Oh. Right. Well, ma, here's the thing," Darcy had tried to lie, but she was horrible at it. "You guys can't come up for a while."

There had been dead silence for a moment. "What?" Her mother had asked sharply.

"Umm, yeah. Just, cuz, there's a...bug thing at the apartment right now, and I know how you are about bugs."

"We'll stay at a hotel, Darcy. And honey, you should _not_ be in that house if there are bugs. I know a guy. Let me call him for you-"

"Wait. From way down in Virginia you know a guy who can help my apartment in _Boston_? Nevermind. It was a slip of the tongue, anyways, because really it's not just my apartment- it's the whole city, and most of New England for that matter. There's a bug thing."

She could hear her father laugh through the phone and say, "Next she'll be saying the water is turning to blood. Tell her I said that, honey." She must have been on speakerphone. Surprising, considering how technologically-impaired her parents were.

"You're father says-"

"Yeah," Darcy had broken in. "I heard. Ha ha. Very funny. No, it's like a virus tree bug thing. I don't really know, but anyways people aren't suppose to come to Boston for a few months."

"But that doesn't make any-"

"Ummm, oh no! Nathan's doing something bad, I've got to go- I love you both! Bye!" And she'd hung up.

* * *

Nathan and Darcy were curled up one night watching The Lion King, a thick sweater and a quilt separating them so Nathan could still lean against her, when the baby started kicking quite a bit. Even through the layers Nathan could feel it, and his eyes grew huge because it was the first time he'd felt it.

"Did _I_ do that?" he asked in surprise.

Darcy laughed and paused the movie.

"Yup. When you were in my belly you kicked up quite a storm, especially in the last month. You just couldn't wait to get out and meet everyone here."

"Wow," he breathed, impressed. The baby kicked again and he jumped, startled, and then laughed. "Come on baby! I want to meet you too!"

It made Darcy's heart glow with love and pride at what a wonderful little boy he was.

They started the movie again soon after that and the baby quieted a little. But there would be the occasional kick from the baby, and each time Nathan would turn to Darcy's belly and pat it affectionately in an 'oh, you' kind of way.

* * *

Loki's sense of urgency had grown over the last week. It felt like something was coming, and it had made him more tense and irritable than usual. To add to that irritability, he'd finished the frame for the Bifrost, and was stuck waiting around Asgard for his teleporting to come back enough so he could go to Jotunheim.

To pass time he'd been spending his days again either with Baldr, whom Odin still refused to pass judgment on, or in his own room, practicing magic and trying to anticipate Laufey's next move. The older man's laid-back, down to earth attitude had a somewhat calming effect on Loki, whose nerves were so often raw these days from anxiety.

It was amazing, he had noted with a dull amusement, how weak he really must be. That he could be reduced to such a wreck just by being away from his family.

He and Baldr were playing chess today. Baldr wasn't a _good_ player, but he was an _interesting _player. His strategy, if he had one, was to be as reckless and unexpected as possible. Loki always won, but it was still fun.

It was a good enough way to pass a day. He appreciated Baldr's jokes and attempts to cheer him up, but his smile was mostly for Baldr's benefit. His heart ached like a bitch.

* * *

Nathan eyed Darcy in astonishment.

"How can you eat all that?" He asked, his eyes wide.

"Mmpf," Darcy mumbled through a bite of pumpkin pie. Her plate was piled high with desert. "What can I say? The baby likes their vegetables." She sighed in contentment. "Jane, this pie is _incredible_."

Jane laughed. "I made it just for you, you know. You are a pie fiend."

It was true. Every holiday one of the things Darcy looked forward to most were Jane's pies. She didn't bake much, but when she did...good lord.

"In fact," she said, licking her spoon. "You might say it's _pie_fect."

Nathan giggled. "Mommy, that's not a word."

"It certainly is."

He gasped- whether out of surprise or indignation was anyone's guess. "No!" He looked at Thor. "Is it?"

"Yes," Thor agreed, and Jane shook her head, smiling.

"You two are setting that boy up for a rude awakening when he learns to play Scrabble."

"Ah, but is any awakening ever truly_ not _rude?" Darcy asked.

It was Christmas, and Darcy and Nathan were over at Jane and Thor's (Darcy's parents having developed a unique tradition of taking holiday cruises in the past couple years). It had been a colorful day, although some of the credit for that could be given to Liam and Isaac, who had taken to throwing their food around.

The boys played together for most of the day while the three adults played the aforementioned Scrabble, and finished getting the food ready. Their Scrabble games had become something of a tradition every year.

"Aha!" Thor exclaimed in victory. "Finally! My first Triple Word Score. Loki usually snatches those up somehow." Immediately after that he fell silent, looking apologetically at Darcy.

It took her a minute to realize why. "Oh," she said. "Mmm. Yeah, he'd be proud of you."

Thor frowned, expecting a bit more of a reaction. But he shrugged it off. Everyone dealt with things differently.

For a moment Darcy felt a shiver of unease, but then Liam started crying and the moment was gone.


	8. Chapter 7

_**As of 12/18/2012:** This chapter has been updated. Huzzah! It makes me much happier now._

* * *

December thirtieth Darcy started having contractions.

"Whoa! This is it, Nate. We're off to see the wizard! That is, your uncle."

"Baby's coming?" He asked excitedly.

"Baby's coming," Darcy agreed.

She'd had a bag already packed for the last month, just in case, and she grabbed it now. In a matter of minutes they were out the door.

She called Jane en route, and Jane started clearing the living room.

"This is it! It's finally happening!" Jane exclaimed.

Five hours later:

"So, it may have been a false alarm," Darcy said. Her contractions had only lasted an hour, and then nothing.

"But I want to see the baby _now_!" Nathan whined.

"Me too, buddy. But I guess baby needs a little more time."

* * *

_Darcy stood in the middle of an orchard, a basket on one hip, her silken mahogany locks flowing down her back and around her waist. There was such an air of innocence about her- never had she been touched by sorrow, or trouble. She glowed with trust. Something insidious inside of him acknowledged how tempting it was to corrupt that trust, whispering that it would be so easy..._

_ She was picking the golden apples of immortality that kept the gods young and youthful- she was the keeper of Time, and she could make it do as she wished though she did not know it. Loki could see the potential in her as clearly as the sweetness in the curve of her smile as she noticed him._

_ "Hello," she called out, and her voice was soft and smooth as silk._

_ But it mattered not. He had been dragged into a promise, and he must carry out his part of the deal. Secretly, he thrilled to it, even as his conscience denied it._

_ 'Bring me the keeper of the Gods' golden apples, Loki, along with her bounty' the eagle had said, and, filled with agony as his flesh peeled from his bones as he was dragged in it's iron taloned grip over jagged rocks and thorns, he had finally relented._

_ He smiled charmingly. "Darcy! I've come at once. You cannot imagine- I can hardly believe it myself!"_

_ "What is it?" Darcy asked, her brown eyes wide with intrigue._

_ "There is a tree, in Midgard, beyond the Bifrost- it is unlike any tree I have seen in this or any realm. It stands alone in a glade and from it there is a glow such as the moon itself- and Darcy, on it's branches grow golden apples. Just as yours do- and perhaps even give immortal life. We should take them for the gods at once!"_

_ Darcy's mouth fell open with excitement and quickly voiced her agreement. Loki reminded her not to forget her own apples, so as to have a comparison, and they made their way to Midgard over the Bifrost._

_ On the other side, the eagle waited. As soon as Darcy set foot on Midgard, it flew out of a bush and snatched her up in it's great talons and bore her away._

_ Without Darcy's apples, Asgard quickly fell apart. The gods' skin wrinkled and they shrunk, their minds going soft. Loki reveled in the chaos, though he tried to deny it to himself, and finally Odin ordered Loki to bring Darcy back or else face death._

_ So Loki turned himself into a falcon and flew to Jotunheim, for he knew that the eagle was really only a Frost Giant in disguise. _

_ He found Darcy in a hut at the very top of one of the tallest mountains. The wind howled around it and it's floor was covered in snow. Darcy sat huddled in a corner on some straw, her fine, mahogany hair dulled, and her bright eyes no longer twinkled. She saw him and shrank from him, shivering with cold and fear and Loki felt shame grip him as if acid had been poured down his throat: this then was the result of his weakness, and of the darkness that lived inside of him. First Sif and now Darcy. Was he doomed to forever take that which was beautiful and good in the world and break it, and ruin it, and change it into something that was a horrid, sad mutilation of what it had once been? What he touched, he tarnished. He was not fit to lick even Heimdall's boots._

_ He had never hated himself more._

_ "Darcy..." he said, and his voice was rough from emotion. She began rocking back and forth, and tears slipped down her pale cheeks, freezing into droplets at her chin in the coldness._

_ There were footsteps at the door then and Loki had to act fast. Darcy would not be coming willingly with him and he needed to leave. So he turned her into an acorn and carried her in his beak out the window and back to Asgard, clutching her basket of apples in his talon._

_ "What are we to do with these?" Odin asked angrily upon his return, pointing at the apples, which had rotted, their golden skin now brown and sunken._

_ "Whatever you bloody well like," Loki snarled, tense and filled with an explosive self-loathing. "Shove them up your arse for all I care."_

_ Odin snarled with rage but Loki stalked off and Odin could not follow him, more affected than Loki by the absence of the apples. Loki was still young, and he did not feel their loss. He walked on for a ways with no particular destination in mind, busy mentally flogging himself. _

_ What kind of person was he? he wondered. He had gotten a rush from the idea that Darcy would be in danger, that she would be forever changed. He could deny it all he wanted- and gods did he want to!- but in his heart of hearts, he knew. He could have found a way around his promise. I f he had tried, he could have. _

_ But he hadn't, had he?_

_ Perhaps Frigga was right to hate him. He had always tried to tell himself that she just didn't know him, that if she had ever tried then she would have found something worthwhile in him- for surely there must be _one_ thing about him that was not just utter shit- but maybe she had been right all along. Maybe he had been deluding himself; playing the wolf in sheep's clothing._

_ The gentle scent of geraniums was suddenly all around him and he looked up. It was that woman again, with hair blacker than the night and a smirk that said she knew every shameful thing he had ever thought, and that she found it amusing._

_ "Kicking ourselves while we're down, are we?" She asked with a laugh. She always had something to smile about. There was nothing she took seriously. "What fun," she drawled._

_ He scowled at her. There was something about the woman that raised his hackles. She just showed up, out of the blue, when he was alone. Saying odd things, and generally being...strange. There was something childlike about her- not an innocence, but the brutal egotisticallity of a toddler that would have what it wanted and let everyone be damned if they would not give it to them._

_ "Leave me be, woman," he growled. He had not the patience for this. _

_ She raised a brow. "So angry." She tutted. "And rude. Has no one ever taught you manners?"_

_ "Speak your piece and be done with it then," Loki said through gritted teeth, his self-directed anger only too happy to expand so it could encompass her as well._

_ "I ought to take you over my knee," the woman snapped, angry for the first time since he'd known her, and her hair rippled as if by a wind. But they were on Asgard, and there was no wind. "Sometimes I do not know why I even bother with you. Never in my life have I met one as ungrateful for my company as you. I've helped you- have I not helped you? I've given you books of spells, I've given you knowledge, I have given you all that you have asked for-"_

_ "Except peace," Loki muttered under his breath. _

_ Her jaw clenched, her blue eyes shards of ice, and Loki regretted his flippant words. But she swallowed it back and forced a somewhat sharp laugh._

_ "Oh Loki," she said softly, her voice all false sympathy. "You were not meant for peace. There will come a day when you will stand over the graves of all you hold dear, and your anger and sorrow will know no bounds. The great tree Yggdrasil itself will shiver with fear of your might. You are meant for great things, my young apprentice, but you were not made for _peace_." She snarled the last word as if it were an obscenity._

_ Loki stared at her. She had certainly won his full attention._

_ "What is this?" Loki asked suspiciously, struck afresh by the absurdity of her and her visits. He shivered with a sense of foreboding- there had been utter surety in her words, and, almost- more puzzlingly- _pride_. "Why do you come to me? What is your business with me?" _

_ For it was true- she had given him books of spells when he had wanted for them, and she had taught him much that he could not have learned on his own, for she was well versed in magic. Clearly she viewed him as an apprentice of sorts, and yet...why? How would she even have gotten the idea in her head? As far as he knew, the rest of Asgard remained oblivious to his new quest to conquer magic. He had made sure that none had seen as he turned himself into a hawk to rescue Darcy. Frigga might have her suspicions, but she seemed to have voiced none._

_ She just looked at him archly, her smile superior._

_ "At least tell me your name then," Loki cried in frustration. She could give him that much._

_ "What is in a name though," she asked with a smirk. "except a label that others have given us? I prefer not to let them. You may call me..." she thought for a moment, and then smiled, pleased. "Yes. Yes that will do nicely. You may call me Agda."_

_ "I would rather not call you anything," Loki said with frustration. How was he supposed to trust a woman who could not even give him a name! And that rubbish about 'labels' was utter lunacy. He did not believe it for a moment. "I would rather you leave me in- alone," he corrected, annoyed that her previous speech had affected him so much. "I would rather be alone."_

_ Something flashed in her eyes that Loki could not follow, and she simply said, "Very well then," and a moment later, she was gone. The scent of geraniums lingered._

_ Loki walked on, going over this new information in his mind. The self-recrimination had come back as soon as she left and stopped distracting him from it. _

_ He had not been meaning to, but his feet had led him to Darcy's orchards. The trees were barren now, their leaves dead and withered. Darcy knelt on the grass in their midst, her body returned to it's previous state, even if she herself would never be the same again._

_ Loki wondered how she had gotten back to her orchards without being mobbed by gods and goddesses eager for apples that did not exist anymore in the capacity they desired. He had meant to- something. Help her, perhaps. But Odin had sidetracked him, and she had disappeared._

_ "I suppose you're very pleased with yourself," she said dully, looking up at him. And how different she was now from the last time he had seen her in this very spot. She seemed weary now, and harder, though beautiful as ever. Her eyes had smiled once, but now they were only sad. Loki stood awkwardly, completely at a loss for what to say. _

_ He looked around, slightly desperately, wishing that he could think of something- _anything_- to say. But what could he say? 'I'm sorry'? It wasn't enough. It could never be enough._

_ "Your apples..." he said finally, looking at the barren tree._

_"Dead," she said simply. Sadly. They were her life's work. She had tended them with care and devotion for many years. "All dead."_

_ "Maybe they will grow back," Loki said and inside he was screaming at himself. Why didn't he just go!? Why could he not seem to leave her!?_

_ "Is it fun?" Darcy asked detachedly. "To...hurt people?" _

_ Loki could say nothing. Shame made him mute. One day, he vowed, he would be able to fill any silence. One day, he would never be without the right words to say._

_ "I wouldn't think so,"she said. "But maybe there's only one way to find out." The sadness in her eyes turned to anger. "I hate you," she said softly, and Loki flinched. "I hate you." With more venom now. "Do you know what he did to me?" Loki could guess. Her lip curled and she looked away. "Leave me," she said wearily. "I cannot stand the sight of you."_

_ Helplessly, Loki did- half of him hating that he felt like such a slave to that darkness inside of him, and the other half hating that he felt like such a slave to the regret and shame that he now felt. _

_ But of one thing, he was in complete agreement with: he hated himself._

* * *

"Sif, do not," Loki warned sharply.

He was in a foul mood. His nightmares had shifted away from that horrible day, but had grown no less harrowing. Instead he had started dreaming memories of old that his sleeping mind twisted so that whoever the memory had been about, their own face was replaced by Darcy's. He had played much mischief in his youth, and much of it had left victims. His mind had many possibilities to choose when it came to tormenting him, and it seemed eager to do so.

Meanwhile Sif had been coming on to him for the past few weeks, and he was _ not_ appreciative. It felt like the greatest of insults- that she had the audacity to think that Loki would still want _her_ after he'd had Darcy.

Sweet, silly, lovable Darcy. How had they worked together? he wondered now. How had they been happy!? Along with the memories, Loki had begun realizing just how different he was now. He wasn't the man he had been with her. Had never been that man. He _couldn't_ be that man, who had been so ordinary. So uncomplicated. And that's who Darcy had loved. That's who she expected to come back.

So how could he go back to her? How could he show up as the bruised, dark, fucked up man that he really was? She would shrink away, and he would not be able to blame her.

And yet it would shatter his heart completely if she did.

"I was not about to do anything," Sif said, looking a little hurt but mostly offended. "I was just going to suggest that, perhaps, since you had been on the mortal realm for the past few years that you had forgotten how real women-"

There was a time when he would have been overjoyed at the promise of her words, but now they just repulsed him. On some level he realized that he was probably overreacting, that she had not even known Darcy, and that, really, what had happened so long ago hadn't entirely been her fault. But his anger was stronger, and his wounds with Sif ran deep.

"Enough," Loki snapped menacingly, his face cold and unforgiving. "Speak one more word and you will regret it for a very long time."

Sif opened her mouth, but paled and thought better of it a moment later. Offended and a little frightened, she turned away with a huff, leaving Loki standing alone in the middle of the palace's gardens.

He'd been on his way to look over the Bifrost frame again, for the thousandth time, just to make absolutely sure there was really nothing else he could do while he waited. Now though, he felt a little sick. He knew he could not ever be tempted by another woman. The only woman for him was waiting for him, so far out of his reach- in more ways than one- at the moment that it was laughable.

It had been about three and a half weeks since he'd last seen his wife and son, but it felt like months. Perhaps in part because he knew that for them, it _had_ been months. Almost nine, to be exact. What must they be thinking?

He hoped Thor had gotten back alright, and that Loki had at least been able to do _that_ much. And maybe Thor had been able to explain a little better what was going on- Darcy must be so confused.

And Nathan! He missed the little boy so much. He was such a happy child- and so different from Loki in so many ways. And yet Loki could see parts of himself in him- like how he had a habit of examining things he didn't understand for a long time, and not wanting to ask for help. Nathan wanted to do everything on his own, and being a bright boy, often could.

How could Loki face them? And yet, how could he not try. He _had_ to get home to them. And if Darcy demanded he leave, then...

Loki took the ring off his finger, checking almost anxiously the engraving inside it, feeling sick at heart, and then put it back on, slightly heartened.

He realized that the last thing he wanted right now was to confront what was keeping him here. He knew the frame was sound. He knew he could do no more at present. Instead, he left the gardens and decided to go off into town.

He hadn't even realized, but he'd unintentionally been cooping himself up in the palace. He hadn't been outside it's perimeter even once in nearly a month.

Yes, he decided. A walk into town was just what he needed. The hustle and bustle of the city would surely take his mind off of the heavy thoughts that he wanted so badly to escape from.

His heart felt a little lighter at the prospect, and he hummed a little as he walked.

If he had stopped to think about it, he would have realized that he was humming part of one of Darcy's old favorite songs, "Call Me Maybe".

* * *

The real contractions started late on New Year's eve. There was nothing remarkable or different about the birth, and four exhausting hours later, in the wee hours of New Year's Day, a perfect little girl was born.

Well.

"Oh wow," Darcy sighed, holding the baby in her arms and staring at her in amazement. "Holy smokey bear- look at her. She's so _beautiful_."

Liam and Isaac had, amazingly, slept through the whole thing, but Nathan had woken up not too long before the baby was born. Thor had kept him in the kitchen, busy playing games.

"She is indeed," Jane smiled, though her smile was a little strained at what Darcy had glossed over. "What are you going to call her?"

The first time round, Darcy and Loki had talked over names the whole pregnancy. But this time, Darcy hadn't even really thought about it until the last month. She been considering a few, but seeing the baby it was like the baby chose her own name.

"Elaisa," Darcy said, looking adoringly down at her.

"Oooh, I've never heard that one before," Jane smiled. "A unique name for a unique baby." She looked over her shoulder towards the kitchen. "Nathan wants to come in and see the baby. Is that okay or do you want to rest?"

Darcy was pretty tired, but she wanted Nathan to see the baby.

"Send him in," she said magnanimously, feeling like a somewhat rumpled queen.

Nathan was so cute the way he kind of crept into the room, unsure. Darcy smiled.

"It's okay, Nate. Come on over and meet your sister Elaisa."

"She's so little," Nathan said, surprised. At six pounds, she was actually pretty average, but in Nathan's self-proclaimed 'grown up eyes' she was tiny. "Was I that small?"

"You sure were, buddy," Darcy said.

"Wow," Nathan breathed. "And were my eyes like that, too? How come they're red?"

She did indeed have red eyes. They were bright and curious, and a startling contrast to her pale, slightly flushed yet faintly blue, skin- and a far cry from the bigger, red-faced baby that Darcy remembered Nathan to have been.

In every way, she was a striking baby. From her delicate, petite frame to her pale blue skin- the red eyes, and a light, downy cap of jet black soft curls. She was beautiful, and almost ethereal. Darcy couldn't believe that she'd made this baby- except there was her chin, in miniature form. Also, the fact that she'd birthed her. That helped a lot with the believing thing.

"Nope. She's got some pretty unusual peepers there."

Nathan nodded, tilting his head as he considered her. He leaned down close to her and whispered. "Hi baby. I'm your brother."

The baby stared back at him curiously. She waved her little hands at him and he came closer. Then she whacked him on the nose and started crying.

"Ow!" Nathan exclaimed, surprised. He rubbed his nose and frowned at the baby.

"I'm sorry, honey," Darcy said, trying not to smile as she calmed the baby down.

"I don't think she's done yet," Nathan sniffed, his nose in the air. "Put her back and we'll wait a little longer."

* * *

That morning Loki was visiting Baldr.

"Cannot you just go the old-fashioned way?" Baldr asked curiously. "Or is walking too good for the great Loki."

"No," Loki shook his head miserably. He had sunk back into doubt again, and it's teeth would not release him for anything. "It's not that- there is a great, surging river that surrounds Jotunheim. It's waters roar and rage such that only the most well-crafted of boats can make the journey. A dwarven-made ship. That's what I would need."

"And Odin does not possess one?" Baldr frowned. Surely he must. He was the king of the gods!

"No, he has one."

"Then shape up, brother!" Baldr exclaimed, confused by Loki's continued air of hopelessness. "Surely he will lend it to you. Then you can get what you need to go back to your family." He clapped Loki on the back. "This is good news! Why can you not smile?"

But Loki couldn't smile. It was true. He supposed he did possess the mean to go. His journey was not at all as impossible as it had felt yesterday. And yet...

"What if it works?" was all he could say.

Baldr scowled at him, displeased. "Then what you have been trying to achieve since you got here will be accomplished. I was under the impression that you loved this woman, Loki. Do you deny it now?"

It was _because_ he loved her that he was worried. He had been so decided just a few days earlier. But now...was he being selfish? he asked himself. Would it _really_ be in Darcy's best interest for him to return? He was _such_ a prize, he thought with withering self-hate.

"More than anything," he said simply. His heart yearned for her always despite the fact that he did not deserve her, his arms ached to hold her. His eyes, to gaze upon her face. Just to bask in the warm, comforting cadence of her voice. Everything about her called to him, even more strongly than when he'd been with her before. Perhaps he had had to grow darker to better appreciate the light that shone in her so strongly.

And she loved him. She did. He knew she did even as his mind struggled to comprehend _how_.

And suddenly it was blindingly clear: he would go then. Of course he would go. It didn't matter if it was selfish of him or not, he would do what he had to do to make it back to her. He could dally about for any amount of time worrying how it would turn out, but in the end, he would always go. As long as her arms were open to him then he would find a way to be in them.

He simply didn't possess the will to stop himself.

* * *

Darcy thought she could vaguely hear knocking. She'd been catching a quick nap that afternoon while the baby slept, but she was finding it harder to sink into a deep sleep these days. It had been the same when Nathan was born. Like her mothering instincts had taken over and dictated that she could only sleep lightly, because the baby would need something and she had to get it for them right away. Which worked out not so great for getting some rest.

It had been two weeks, and life was a good deal more complicated than it had been.

Elaisa was a good baby. She didn't cry very often, and she slept more regularly than Nathan had at that age. But she was...unpredictable in a slightly terrifying way. After a few days, the red of her eyes had faded to a warm chocolate- the same color as Darcy's eyes, and the blue tint to her skin had faded into a pale ivory-rose. Which was, admittedly, a bit of a relief. It would have been hard explaining that to people.

The problem was- though it wasn't such a big problem during winter, except that it looked bizarre and worrisome indoors- Elaisa's skin and temperature was much colder than a normal baby, and because of that, when she was in a warm room her exhales created fog. Not a huge deal because Darcy had been inside a lot of the past two weeks (Jane and Thor kindly offering to get Nathan to and from school), and it wasn't _that_ noticeable. Just enough to be odd.

Putting some slippers on, she got up and opened the door.

"Oh," Darcy said rather stupidly, her mind still a little hazy from sleep. "No."

"Surprise!" Darcy's mother exclaimed, grinning and embracing her in an enthusiastic hug.

"Hey there kiddo," her dad smiled, clapping her shoulder.

They both looked quite pleased with themselves.

"So where's my newest grandbaby?" Darcy's mom asked, brushing past her into the house.

"Umm...what?"

It all happened in about thirty seconds. Finally processing the fact that her parents were here to see their very unusual granddaughter, she started getting a little nervous.

Following her parents back inside, she tried to head them off.

"Well, actually, it's kind of her nap time right now, so-"

"Ooh." Her mother practically wilted.

Darcy was about to heave a sigh of relief when Ellie started crying. Her mother visibly brightened.

"Do you hear that, honey?" She said to Darcy's father. "The baby woke up just for us." She sounded annoyingly pleased.

"Yeah. Wow. How about that," Darcy said, resigned. "I'll go get her."

Ellie stopped crying when Darcy picked her up. Instead she just looked at Darcy with wide eyes and a little smile, and like she always did, Darcy melted. Ellie reached her arms out then and yanked Darcy's hair, still smiling at her.

"Ow! Oh you vicious little thing," Darcy cooed affectionately, un-entangling her hair from Ellie's hands and pushing it out of reach. "You are a little warrior, you know that? I wouldn't be surprised if you grew up to be a football player or a lawyer or something. Now, honey, I need you to be a good girl for mommy. Your gramma and grandpa came all this way to meet you, but they don't know how special you are, and I don't know if they would understand. So I need you to keep your tricks for after they leave, okay?"

Ellie made more grabbing reaches for her hair and started making funny little noises.

"I know, sweetie. You want my hair. But I want my hair too. Let's compromise and I get what I want and you don't."

Darcy shifted her onto hip- she was getting heavy already- before taking her out to the living room where her parents waited.

* * *

Loki poured over what few maps had been made of Jotunheim. They were rough and probably not the most accurate, because it was a realm that had not much been explored. But if there was any truth to them, Loki would have to get right into the heart of the realm.

He spent hours memorizing them, itching to just leave now and damn the impracticality of that. He needed to prepare- Jotunheim was a desolate, dangerous realm. Discounting the pissed off Frost Giants and great beasts that lived there, it's climate alone was enough to give one pause. He needed to think things through.

* * *

Jane dropped Nathan off a few hours into Darcy's visit with her parents, and there was much exclaiming about how big Nathan was getting and what was he doing these days and so on.

Ellie had been behaving like a perfectly normal baby, and after a while Darcy had relaxed. It was so nice to see her parents again. She always forgot how good it was to see them after being apart for a while.

Nathan entertained them all by doing an impression of Alan Rickman (Snape having become his hero after listening to the books on tape and then being sat down in front of the TV by a delighted Darcy).

Her mother took her aside at one point as they made tea in the kitchen.

"I'm so proud of you, Darcy. I hope you know that."

"Aww, mom! That's so sweet of you- of course I know that." Her eyes started stinging a bit. She was still a little hormonal.

"I mean it. I really do. I think it's fabulous- two kids, and all on your own. I just can't believe their father left." She shook her head disparagingly.

"Well, Thor and Jane are amazing," Darcy admitted. "They've really been my rocks. I'm so grateful to them, I can't even tell you."

"I'm sure they have been, but don't sell yourself short. You're an amazing woman, Darcy Lewis."

Her silly mother, forgetting. "Actually ma, it's Darcy-"

But Nathan came zooming in with a blanket over his shoulders just then.

"I'm a pterodactyl! I'm a pterodactyl!" He shouted, pecking at Darcy's arms.

"Okay, honey, okay. But if you see a little boy called Nate, can you tell him his tea is done and that if he wants he can have a cookie?"

Nathan quickly dropped the blanket. "Look! It's me! I can have cookie?"

Darcy laughed. "That was fast," she said, ruffling his hair.

He squirmed away, sticking his tongue out at her and grabbing a cookie. "No take backs!" he yelled, snatching up his cape again and screeching his idea of a pterodactyl caw in between bites of cookie.

Darcy's mom laughed. "He's as much of a handful as you were."

Darcy grinned. "But of course."

They carried the tea out to the living room and sat down again.

"Here ya go, grandpa," Darcy said, setting his mug in front of him.

He had Ellie on his lap and he was reading Shakespeare to her while she played with his keys. Nathan had settled down, laying on his belly under the coffee table lapping at his tea like a dog.

Yup. Life was pretty good.

Her dad cleared his throat and continued reading.

"Oh Romeo, Romeo- wherefore art thou Romeo?"


	9. Chapter 8

**_As of 12/18/2012:_ **_This chapter has finally been updated! Oh snap!__  
_

_Thank you for dealing with my crazy- this story is quite noticeably different from it's first draft (but better! I promise it's better!). Bless you for sticking through with this: you are all wonderful =)_

_If you want a chapter by chapter overview of what i've changed, I made a post on Tumblr that will tell you without you having to go back and read this whole thing again ;)_

_This website hates giving links, so if you want that, just go to my tumblr page: thelasthohoho and I have an archive button. Go to that and type in: **from father to god of mischief** and the post will be there._

* * *

"Mom! Ellie took my action figure and she won't give it back!"

The yell came from the living room. Darcy shook her head as she scrubbed the bathtub. "Nathan! Just what have I told you about yelling in the house?" She yelled back from the upstairs bathroom.

"But _you're_ doing it too!" came the answering shout.

"Honey- do as I say, not as I do."

"_What_?"

"I said-!" Darcy broke off, putting the sponge down. "Parenting," she muttered to herself. "When you have to teach your kids not to do all the fun stuff that you like doing. Bah. Well- not that I necessarily like yelling, but swearing..." She sighed a sigh of longing. "I do miss swearing." She shook her head. "The things you give up for your children. Ah well- something to look forward to when they're in their teens."

She'd been catching up on some cleaning, but now was as good a time as any to stop for lunch so she washed her hands and headed downstairs to the kitchen.

Passing through the living room to get there, she saw the problem.

"Oh. Well that's interesting." She tried not to laugh.

Nathan scowled. "I told you she took my action figure."

"Well but _he_ took my dolls!" Ellie exclaimed, pointing an accusatory finger at him.

Nathan grumbled something that could have been, "Only the bank robbing ones."

Two dolls were in a circle made of blocks with a piece of paper in front of it saying "Jail".

"So this was...? What- retaliation?" Darcy asked.

"Mommy, look how pretty he is?" Ellie said, holding out said action figure. She'd put a tiny dress on the toy wrestler, and he looked to be the ruler of her dollhouse. Her other dolls all lay in a pile on the floor of the dollhouse.

"Wow. That's very pretty, Ellie. But what happened to the dolls? That's quite a collection of bodies."

Nathan snickered, but Ellie just looked at her with innocent big brown eyes.

"What?" She asked. "They're sleeping."

"Oooooh," Darcy said, amused at herself. Of course. Why would a two and a half year old have pretended her dolls were dead? Yeesh. "Who's hungry? Anyone?"

"Me!" Nathan said, jumping up.

"Me too!" Ellie said, jumping up as well. It was really cute how much she looked up to him. They fought sometimes, but she thought the world of him.

"Well alright then," Darcy said, shooing them into the kitchen. "Let's have some salad!"

They both made faces.

"Chocolate, please," Ellie said, dimpling up at Darcy.

Darcy made her eyes wide. "You want chocolate salad? Well, okay, but I don't know how that's going to-"

"No!" Ellie cried, laughing. "No! Just chocolate, silly."

"You can't have chocolate, Ellie, you're too little," Nate said authoritatively. "But _I_, on the other hand..."

"Okay, okay-"

"_Really_?"

Darcy made a face at them and shook her head. "_No_kay, then. Something halfway healthy, please."

Nathan rolled his eyes. "Fine. Scrambled eggs?"

Darcy nodded. "Acceptable."

"Appasauce!" Ellie declared.

"App_le_sauce," Nathan corrected. It annoyed him when she said it that way, because he knew she _could_ say it the right way.

"Don't start on that, Nate," Darcy said, hoping to distract him. "Here, help me- get the eggs out."

"Okay," he said, doing as he was told. Darcy got the pan out.

"Where's my appasauce?" Ellie asked. Nathan made a sound of indignation.

"Moooooooom!"

* * *

Loki had finally deemed himself prepared enough. He had studied the maps extensively, and poured through Odin's great library for any and all information that had been collected about Jotunheim. He had packed food and clothes. He had done everything but tell Odin that he was leaving, which he was about to rectify.

For once, Odin was actually in his office rather than off at some meeting. He was bent over a desk going over some papers, but he looked up grumpily at Loki's knock on the door. His face clouded over in anger when he saw who it was, but Loki ignored it. If he was bothered every time Odin was angry with him than most of his life would have been spent in unhappiness.

"Excellent news," he grinned, unable to tamp his spirits down even in the face of Odin's sobriety. "I shall be going to Jotunheim presently."

Odin's face warmed infinitesimally at this. "It's about time," he growled, and Loki felt a shot of annoyance. Could he never just be pleased? But then he noticed how Odin was favoring his arm slightly, and remembered that his father was _dying_, and was ashamed.

"Yes. Well. I'll be getting what I need for the Bifrost. And not to worry," he said, unable to keep some of the bitterness from his voice. "Frigga will soon be gracing these halls once more."

Odin nodded tightly. "Do you require anything?"

"The dwarves' boat," Loki said. "Skidbladnir." It was a remarkable feat of Dwarven craftsmanship, a boat large enough to hold every god and goddess on it's deck, and yet it could be folded small enough that it would fit quite handily in Loki's pocket.

Odin hesitated, but only for a moment. He was inordinately fond of that gift, but he wanted Frigga back and would give much more than that to see it so.

"So be it," he said. "I shall expect you back by the new moon."

"That is two weeks' time!" Loki exclaimed, brows raised. "Impossible. I am on foot, if you remember, and Jotunheim is riddled with mountains. Perhaps I can make it back for three weeks, but even that I am unsure of."

Odin's face was stormy. He didn't care. "You can do it, Loki," he said menacingly, "and you _will_." Frigga would not spend one single day longer than she had to in that place. He curled his lip. "May the luck of the gods be with you, my son."

Loki bit his tongue. There was still so many unspoken things between them, and yet Loki could not trust himself to speak of them now. With difficulty, he swallowed his anger. "Thank you, father," he said sarcastically. "Until later, my most kingly of kings." He bowed and left.

Once free of Odin's glare though, his high spirits returned, and he was grinning as he went off to Baldr's new quarters to say goodbye.

Odin had finally passed judgment- that judgment being that he had declared that Baldr would pay for his crimes against Asgard by serving it. For seven years he would be part of the royal army. It was blatant favoritism, seeing as how the army had not been called on for many years. In all likelihood Baldr would serve his time without ever once going into battle. But Odin was king, and he was allowed to show favoritism at times.

Baldr was staying in the barracks, a long building off to the side of the palace. He had been greatly looking forward to meeting Frigga, and would be overjoyed to hear that she would be returning soon.

Frankly, Loki was a little jealous, because Frigga had mourned losing Baldr and when she'd gained Loki she'd never treated him as a son. But it was only a little thing, the jealousy, and he shoved it aside, knowing it was irrational. He was looking forward to seeing the look on Baldr's face when Loki told him he leaving to get Frigga.

"Knock knock," Loki said before opening the door to Baldr's room. It was empty, but the back door that led out to the gardens was open slightly, and on going out Loki saw Baldr sitting between the flower beds on the slight hill that was the east garden. He was carving, and it gave Loki a pang to see it because of how fond Thor was of it. He missed his brother.

Loki walked over, nodding acknowledgment to a young gardener who was weeding as he passed, and sat down next to him, picking a flower and smelling it. And then sneezing.

"Blech. That is revolting," he muttered. It smelled like mold.

Baldr laughed in greeting "They're not for smelling, Loki. Those are Heathwarts. The flowers are useless actually. But if you dry the leaves and then brew them into tea it brings down your fever. Well." He frowned. "I suppose you would have someone else dry the leaves and brew them into a tea if you had a fever. Because. You have a fever. So you shouldn't be doing fire things."

Loki looked at him curiously. "Since when did you become a flower expert?"

Baldr's eyes settled on the gardener Loki had passed- a pretty, willowy blond- with longing for a moment, and then he blushed slightly and looked away. "Nothing," he muttered. "I mean I didn't."

Huh. "Okay," Loki said, letting him get away with it. "Well, anyways. I have amazing news!" he burst out. "I'm going to be leaving today for Jotunheim. I should be back in a few weeks, a certain matronly goddess in tow," he said with a grin.

Baldr had been looking at the wood in his hands as he carved, but at that his head snapped up. "Truly?" He asked, conflicting emotions warring in his face.

"Truly."

Baldr swallowed. "Do you-" he broke off. He'd been about to ask if Loki thought she would like him, but he decided better. Instead he cleared his throat. "I am happy for you," he said. He knew how much Loki had been wanting to do this, and how hard it was for him to wait while life went on without him back on Midgard.

Loki grinned. This was the happiest he'd been since coming to Asgard. He was so close to going home. Well. Not _that_ close, but this step had been the hardest and he was eager to get on to the next one. He was sure it would go faster from here on.

"Thank you, brother."

His heart was soaring- images of Darcy and Nathan filled his mind. He left Baldr to admire his young gardener from afar, and gathered his bag. Within an hour he was gone.

* * *

Thor smiled, looking out the window at the kids playing out in the snow of the backyard. The sun had been threatening to melt the meager snowfall of the previous night, and they were trying to make the most of it.

"It's incredible-" Thor said, staring out at the laughing children with an indulgent smile. "Nathan looks more like Loki every day. Albeit, a somewhat happier one, if I remember correctly." He frowned, thinking back to Loki as a child. It had been almost as if there were two of him- the serious little boy who would as often as not be buried in some dusty old book, and then the wild child who would run around the palace playing pranks on everyone. And as he'd gotten older, the pranks had turned into games of wit and manipulation, also just this side of harmless. Nathan had a lot of that same duality in him, though to a lesser degree, and physically he was practically the spitting image of his father, except that his hair was a dark brown rather than Loki's jet black.

"Loki?" Darcy crinkled her nose, taking a sip of hot cocoa. "That's a funny name."

Thor's eyebrows rose and he stared at her incredulously. "Loki? You're husband Loki?"

"Husb-?" Darcy asked confused. She automatically looked down at her ring finger. There was no ring. Thor wondered what she'd done with it, and how long she hadn't been wearing it for. "Oh. That's weird. I- yeah. Husband." She frowned, looking off at some point in the distance. "Why...?"

She was forgetting him. Thor couldn't believe it. She hadn't even remembered Loki's name until he'd said something. It had to be the work of some spell- it was far too unnatural and bizarre not to be.

He was about to say something- explain to her that she would have to fight to keep her memories of him because something was stealing them. But then- it had been three and a half years and Loki was still gone. She was doing well. The kids were doing well. Wouldn't it just be kinder to let him fade from her thoughts completely? For all they knew- and much as it pained him to come to terms with- Loki could well be lost to them. As it was, she could not remember him enough to be sad about not having him. Why remind her of what she had lost?

So he said nothing, and turned the conversation to the kids. She grabbed hold of the topic change with gratitude and they caught each other up. Nathan had expressed interest on joining the junior baseball team next season. Liam and Isaac were enthralled by all things prehistoric after watching Ice Age. Ellie had decided to be a ballerina and would only wear her tutu these days, and it was hard to convince her to wear a jacket to keep up appearances when the cold winter air didn't bother her at all.

But Thor thought about it for a long time afterward. About how strange it was. Jane couldn't remember Loki either, until Thor explained who he was, and even then she couldn't remember interacting with him much. Despite having seen him at least weekly for four years. It was as if Loki was being erased form this world, and Thor had no idea why, or how. He'd never heard of such a thing happening before.

* * *

It took him the better part of three days to make it to the very edge of Asgard, where the river crashed and roared it's anger, and Jotunheim lay off in the distance, a small white speck.

Assembling Skidbladnir, Loki set off to brave the daunting waves. It took three more days to reach the far shore, and Loki was overjoyed to set his feet once more on solid ground. Even if said ground was covered in sheets of ice that made progress slow and unpleasant.

He folded Skidbladnir down again though and marched forward, eventually finding that if he modified his boots so that they had spike bearing down out of the soles then he could get a better grip. This sped him up somewhat, and by the end of the day he had reached the foot of Jotunheim's famous mountains.

It was only the mountains in the very heart of Jotunheim where pure Energy resided, deep within their cores, and that was his first stop. It took him a week to make it through the mountain passes and into the inner circle of Jotunheim where the mountains he needed lay. He was exhausted by this point, and there was a cold down to his bones that he could not shake even with the warmest of fires. Not that he dared often to make a fire, for he did not want to attract the attention of any Frost Beasts that roamed the mountains, or giants.

He was lucky though- incredibly so, for he met nothing to bar his progress. It made him wonder, in fact, if someone was looking out for him and trying to help. He paid close attention, searching for the scent of geraniums, but Jotunheim's winds were sleepless. If she was helping him, then he could not tell for sure.

Once he had acquired the Energy he needed for the Bifrost, he would perform a simple locating spell to find Frigga, using one of her bracelets that he'd brought specifically for that purpose.

Already it had been nearly two weeks, and it would be slower returning, he was sure. There was no way his luck could hold out for the other two weeks it would take to return.

There was far yet to go. Still, though, Loki felt good. He was doing something. He was working towards his goal. He put his mind away from the cold that wracked him, and he focused on the days yet to come. Days filled with warmth and laughter, the sound of Darcy's voice.

* * *

After talking to Thor that day, Darcy had been badly shaken. _Loki_. The name rattled around inside of her demandingly. Her husband. But she hadn't even remembered being married! It felt so natural just raising the kids on her own. It had always been that way. Except...it hadn't. There were these nagging, almost dreamlike memories if she concentrated really hard- of a laughing, black-haired man kissing her in a church, of him playing with a giggling Nate, of them all curled up together on the couch, him stroking her hair, a sense of home a rightness. But they were wisps only. Like smoke. The more she tried to hold onto them the more they fragmented, getting mixed up with other memories of churches and other times she curled up on the couch, the kids laughing over Thor's stories, Jane hugging her comfortingly as she wept. "_I don't think I can do this,"_she had said to Jane. "_How am I supposed to just go on without him?_"

One of the vague memories was from a few years ago. It had been early on in her pregnancy with Ellie. She'd gotten a call- something about 'picking up his things from the lab'. There had been a few boxes there, and all she'd had to do was take them home. She remembered being thankful that she hadn't had to pack them herself, because she couldn't handle that. It was the same reason she'd just put them in the garage when she'd gotten home that day and hadn't touched them since.

Now she stood in the garage, a little nervous. It was frightening, this realizing that there was an important part of your life that you could barely remember. She had felt too awkward to talk about it with Thor earlier, and Jane had been at work. Tomorrow though, she promised herself. Tomorrow she wouldn't feel awkward, and she would ask Thor just what it meant.

In the meantime, she intended to find out as much as possible about this man. She found the boxes right where she'd left them- in a corner of the garage, behind a hula-hoop and a bike. The lighting wasn't great in the garage, so she brought them into the kitchen.

"Well, this is it," she said with a deep breath. "Down the yellow brick road, or whatever." And she opened the first box.

"Mom?" Ellie's voice brought her back to the present. A quick glance at her watch said it had been an hour. "Mommy are you okay?" Ellie asked, her big brown eyes filled with concern.

Darcy realized she was crying. She sniffed, blinking hard to stop the tears. "Yeah, yeah I'm fine, honey. I just...um...I found this really pretty poetry, and-"

"Mooooom! We're _hungry," _Nathan announced as he, Isaac and and Liam came tromping in from the backyard. They all stopped short though at the evidence that Darcy had clearly been crying.

"Okay, guys, just give me a minute-"

"Er, no that's okay mom," Nathan said hastily. "We're actually not really hungry at all."

"I am," Isaac said, frowning at Nate.

"No. You're not." Nathan assured him with a meaningful glance. He plastered a smile on his face and gave a thumbs up to Darcy. "We'll just be outside some more. Don't worry about us! No worrying. No, sir." And they scampered back outside.

Darcy watched them go with a little amusement.

"Here," Ellie tore off a piece of paper towel and gave it to her. "Don't worry, mommy, even princesses cry sometimes."

Darcy laughed a little and took the paper towel. "Thanks sweetie. Am I a princess then?" she asked, drying her face.

Ellie climbed onto her lap and rested her head against Darcy's chest. "You are to me."

Darcy hugged her back, kissing her forehead. "You are a little angel. You know that?"

"Yeah, I know. Oh- look!" She said, looking at the pages Darcy had been poring over. "That's you, mommy!"

Darcy had found a small packet of papers dated about six years ago. She vaguely remembered being away from Loki for some reason for a few months that year, and apparently he had missed her. There were about twenty pages of stuff addressed to her that he'd never sent. She wondered why. It was clear that he had loved her, though, and she thought she had loved him too. He'd tried to draw her face a number of times, though most of them were only half-finished, and scrawled all over the pages were snippets of poetry.

"Are you sad?" Ellie asked, looking up at her.

"I- yes, a little bit," Darcy admitted, tracing the edge of a photo of herself, him, and a toddler Nathan. They all looked so happy, but she couldn't remember it.

"Should I be sad, too?"

"Oh, Ellie," Darcy said, both touched and alarmed. Ellie was a very empathetic child, and she was much more emotionally mature than a three year old should be. "No. Do you feel sad?"

Ellie cocked her head at Darcy. "A little," she admitted. "I know princesses cry, but sometimes when princesses cry other people want to cry too."

"I'm sorry, sweetheart. I don't want you to be sad." Darcy started putting the things back in the box but Ellie stopped her.

"Can you just read me one of them?" she asked. "Maybe I'll cry too, and then you won't be alone."

Oh my god, Darcy thought. This child is something else. "Well, okay. I guess one wouldn't be too bad."

She picked up a page.

_ "Too late do I find out what burns inside of me._

_ I do not need her to be complete-_

_ But without her I am stone._

_ She is warmth and she is laughter and she is home..."_

* * *

The mountain was excavated as it had been mined and then abandoned. It smelled of sulfur and, strangely, tobacco.

Loki had been walking down into the mountain for an hour at least, before he finally came to what looked to be the center. The walls glimmered blue and looked frosted over though the air was uncomfortably hot. There was almost a pulse inside the mountain. He had felt it as soon as he stepped inside, and it had gotten stronger until he'd gotten to this room. Strangely enough, the pulse matched his own heart rate. He wondered briefly if his heart had responded to the pulse of the mountain, or vice versa.

It was a little strange that he hadn't met a single Frost Giant, even around here. You would think that they would be protecting what meager treasures their realm had, but no. Although, on the other hand, it wasn't as if they'd really ever needed to before. People just didn't _go_ to Jotunheim willingly, and Energy wasn't exactly common knowledge. Loki only knew of it and where it came from because he had studied such things extensively. Most of Asgard knew more about farming and raising crops than about magic and artifacts.

Walking around the edge of the room, Loki studied the walls curiously. There was a great deal of power in the room- that much was unmistakable. But it was...different. He'd never encountered anything like it. Not even the Tesseract, or the Bifrost, though they were supposedly the same material. The magic in the room was pure, and raw. Wild. And Loki got the feeling that it liked it that way. For the first time, Loki admitted that maybe the hardest part hadn't been _getting_ to Jotunheim. He stared at the pulsing blue walls in apprehension.

"Well, I guess I've got to start with something."

He'd brought a handsome green and gold scepter from the treasury room to store the Energy in, and he lifted it now, muttering a transformation spell. What it _should _do was take the Energy from the rock wall and channel it into the crystal in the scepter's head.

"Ah! Fucking hell!" He swore, jumping back as sparks flew from the scepter and the wall actually _spat out his spell_. Okay. So. Maybe a different spell.

An hour and a half later he'd tried every trick he could think of, and nothing had worked. He was still going to be trapped on Asgard. This was it.

He had failed.

The utter sense of loss hit him, the injustice of it. He was punished for trying to do good. _Always _he was punished for it! What had he really ever done that was so terrible that he could not be allowed to have the small measure of peace that he had found on Midgard?

Agda's words of so long ago came to him then: "_You were not made for peace."_

In frustration he hurled the scepter at the wall with all of his might and sank to the ground, desolate. He had never felt lower in his life. What kind of father was he? What kind of husband? What-

"_What_?"

The scepter had collided with the wall and a warm blue had pulsed through it for a moment before it clattered to the floor, the blue gone. Hardly daring to breath, Loki picked the scepter up. It couldn't be that easy. It just _couldn't be_.

He held the the scepter to the wall. As soon as he did the blue light came back, settling into the crystal. "You've got to be kidding me. Seriously!? That was all it took!?" But he could feel the Energy now resting in the scepter. Except it didn't feel like it was resting. He could almost swear it was _pacing_.

The staff felt heavy now, and strange, but Loki was anxious to be moving on. He would have plenty of time to study the Energy back at Asgard, and right now he wanted to get Frigga and go, before whatever power had taken mercy on him decided he should be made to suffer some more.

Concentrating, he took her bracelet out of his pocket and performed a quick locating spell.

"Gotcha," he breathed with relief. And she wasn't terribly far away, either. "Coming mother..."

* * *

"There has to be _some_ way to modify this blasted thing!" Laufey muttered, pacing the length of the throne room. He'd been looking for a way to let his whole army in to Asgard through the ring, but all attempts had failed. His anger boiled all through him; he could think of nothing else but taking revenge on Odin. Long ago, Odin had stolen their Casket from them, and had humiliated Laufey and made him powerless. And Laufey was not a man to take powerlessness well. He _would_ have his revenge. And not just on Odin, but on that sneaky little double-crosser brat of his. _Loki_. Oh yes, his son would suffer. How they would both burn when he got his hands on them. He laughed harshly. And he already had something of theirs. _Frigga_. The pretty goddess, who meant so much to them. Well...

"Not so pretty now, are you?" He said smugly, turning to the object he'd been releasing his frustrations on for the past few months.

She hadn't broken- he would give her that much credit. Damned woman seemed to be made of lead, delicate though she had once appeared. Perhaps the rumors that she had once been a Valkyrie, most fierce of all warriors, were true after all. No matter how he tried, he had not been able to make her cry out. It had grown frustrating, and so he had finally just frozen her, annoyed by the glares she would send him.

So there she was, frozen solid in the middle of his throne room, a reminder that he had already started taking his revenge. Her flawless face was now...not so flawless. He had left clawmarks down her cheeks, belly, back, legs...deep gashes that had healed over into thick white scars. And she was perhaps now missing a few fingers.

He smiled fondly at her. "No," he said. "Not so pretty at all."

She stared back blankly, unable to blink or speak. She could barely breath, he was sure, but she was still conscious. He had not killed her yet- he would not be killing her until Odin knelt before him, knowing he was helpless to stop it happening. _Then_ Laufey would kill her.

Dismissing her, he turned his mind back to the problem of the ring. Boon though it had been, the fact remained: as it was, it was useless to get his army over to Jotunheim. Perhaps it was time to seriously consider the alternative, unwelcome though it was. It was not _im_possible to travel on foot, and boat, through to Asgard. It had been done in the past, but they had been weak for so long. Even if they had made it into Asgard they had been too diminished in strength to pose a real threat.

But now... That they had been in the presence of the Casket for many months. They were strong enough that it was not out of the realm of possibility. It was still by no means Laufey's first choice, but it was looking more appealing all the time.

"Griffin!" He shouted, and a few moments later his right hand man strode in.

"Sire?" The big man asked.

"Join me, Griffin," Laufey said, beckoning him over to the wall where he'd had maps of Asgard tacked up. "I grow weary of waiting for a breakthrough with the ring. What say you to just...going through the mountains?"

"What- walking?" Griffin asked in surprise. Had his king finally gone daft? "But the frost beasts! You know as well as I their ferocious nature, and they have bred into large numbers, roaming the slopes in droves. Frost Lions, Frost Wolves, Frost Bears...all bloodthirsty to their core. And then there are the Ice storms on the outer rims of the mountains with the sheets of ice that could fell even you or I, not even to mention..."He trailed off, overwhelmed. "Sire, 'tis folly!"

"But you forget, Griffin," Laufey snapped sharply with a hard, thin smile. The more Griffin argued against it, the more it seemed to Laufey that Griffin was just a spineless coward. Where was his thirst for vengeance? Where was his hatred? Did he not long to get back at those who had wronged them? "You forget that we are at our strongest as we have not now been for nearly two hundred years."

"But even then, sire, it was-"

"We have been basking in the strength of our beautiful Casket for these past months- and how we have grown!" Laufey continued on, plowing over Griffin's objection. Griffin noticed with discomfort the maniacal gleam in his red eyes. "Our bones grow stronger, our hearts colder, our very blood cries out for revenge. We have been too long at the mercy of _Asgard._" He spat the name as if a curse. "Curled up at their feet, begging for scraps as we wither slowly away into the darkness. But no more. No. It is time we show Asgard that we are not the dogs they think us. That we will bite back when kicked down. At last, Griffin, at last! The time of the Frost Giants-" He grinned a fanatic grin and whirled around, stalking back to his throne and sitting down, tapping his fingers restlessly on the sides as he kept grinning at Griffin, "is upon us."

Griffin took a small step back. He had not realized how far gone his king was.

Suddenly Laufey lost his grin and his eyes narrowed into slits. "_What...is...this?_" he snarled, his head tilted threateningly.

"Sire...?"

"Griffin," Laufey said in a soft, deadly voice. "Just exactly _where_ is that whore of a goddess?"

Frigga? Griffin frowned, his eyes sweeping over the room. He paled. Surely she had been here when he'd come in not ten minutes ago!

"But she was frozen, my lord! She could not possibly have..." he trailed off, silenced by the unholy rage on Laufey's face.

"No," he said. "_She_ could not possibly have escaped. _Loki_." He said the name with a venom that Griffin had only previously heard him use for Odin. It sent a shiver down his spine. "_Find them,"_ he hissed.

Only too happy to leave, Griffin bowed and turned.

"Oh, and Griffin," Loki continued, his voice whisper soft and all the more deadly for it. Griffin stopped in his tracks. "You had better _pray_ that you do not disappoint me. Son of mine or no, I'll have your throat for it."

* * *

_**A/N: **Also, I haven't been entirely useless all this time that I haven't been updating. I____ don't know if anyone's into this kind of thing, but I do write fandom songs and a lot of them are Tasertricks ones (aka Darcy/Loki). I've even been writing an album that's kinda of a fanfic of them told in songs. Anyways that and all my music can be gotten for free from my bandcamp at:_ thelastclarissadotbandcampdo tcom___ (wow this site reeeeaally doesn't want you to send people to websites! it's being so persnickety with what it lets me write xP )_


	10. Chapter 9

_**A/N:** Aaaand finally a new chapter! You guys are all fabulous and I am so sorry for the delay. I realized that before I wrote more I had to go back and edit the whole thing because there were plot points I wanted to introduce earlier and things to fix and such, so that's all done now. The whole story is a bit different than it was and I've added quite a few scenes that are illuminating for some of the characters. If you're interested in what I've changed but don't feel like going back to read the whole thing, I've made a post on tumblr that will catch you up =)_

_Just go to my tumblr page (thelasthohoho) and I have an archive button. Click it and search for **from father to god of**_**_ mischief_,**_ and you'll see the post. ;)_

* * *

Loki was still chuckling twenty minutes later at having stolen Frigga right from under Laufey's nose. He could just imagine the look on Laufey's face.

* * *

It was snowing out ferociously and the wind whipped about his face mercilessly as he carried Frigga to the cave he'd found earlier and set her down. He had been surprised to find her as he had- frozen solid, and so obviously tortured- and his head ached. So much pain. So much suffering. Had it been his fault? He was so tired, and so cold. It was hard to think.

It may as well have been his fault, he decided, because at the very least he could have tried to come sooner and perhaps have spared her some of it. But he had been wallowing in self pity, much as he was close to now. His previous amusement was gone. There was nothing funny about the situation.

They had never been close by any means, but she was still his _mother_. The distance between them had always been on her side, until he'd gotten old enough to realize that it was easier to pretend he wanted nothing from her than to endure the pain of rejection again. But he thought- in some ways- he would always be that little boy who had stumbled onto the discovery of his magic, and run to his mother for guidance._.._

_"Mother?" He cried, running full-speed into her dressing room, a little frightened but mostly excited about his discovery. She was sitting at her mirror, one of her friends- a lady of the court whose name always tumbled away from Loki in a mess of vowels. They were joking about something he didn't catch, a powder brush in hand, but her smile had struck him. Why doesn't she ever smile at _me_? he had thought to himself vaguely, some of the excitement wearing off. "Look what I can do-" _

_They had turned to look at him then, Frigga's smile fading. He'd gotten nervous then, with both of them staring at him. But he was so proud!_

_ Concentrating, he held up the flower he'd brought in from the garden where he'd been playing. It was even simpler this time than before. Almost at once he felt the ice crystals creeping over and covering the flower, encasing it in a glittering shell. In a matter of seconds the whole flower was ice._

_ Something had dropped to the floor with a clatter and Loki had looked up, realizing instantly that he'd done something bad. Frigga's friend was open mouthed with astonishment, and more than a little fear. _

_ "You will not be speaking of this," Frigga commanded, her voice steel, her relaxed manner morphing quickly into utter authority. _

_ Loki had frowned, confused because she was still looking at him, shaken and stern._

_ But her friend answered haltingly. "I- yes. I mean, no. Of course, my lady." _

_ Frigga nodded once. "Leave us," she said. The woman fled quickly. And Loki watched her go with a sick feeling in his stomach. Why was he always making a mess of things? _

_ "Loki, you cannot do that again," Frigga said. "I know you didn't realize what you were doing before, but from now on I must forbid it." _

_ What? "But-" _

_ "No," she cut him off, and her voice was so harsh it frightened him a little and he shrank back. "I will not be bending on this, Loki. Put it out of your mind. You are not to do anything of this sort again." _

_ Loki's mouth felt dry. He tried to swallow but his tongue felt like lead. _

_ "I- okay," he said. He thought he might have whispered but couldn't be sure. All he knew in that moment was how he wished he could just do the right thing for once, and then maybe his mother would like him. _

_ That thought echoed in his mind disorientingly as he stooped to pick up the powder brush that had fallen to the floor. The handle was made of a green stone, carved into a wolf that breathed fire. That detail had only stuck with him because he could only look on in horror as it turned to ice in his hand. _

_ He had straightened, still clutching the brush, and looked up at his mother. Her eyes had been hard for him to read, but it was not a pleasant emotion on her face. _

_ He could feel himself pale. How had this turned out so wrong!? _

_ "I'm sorry, mother! I'm so sorry! I didn't try to do it with this one. Honest, I didn't!" _

_ "Hush, Loki," she had said, her face thawing a little. "I believe you. But you must learn to control it, or it will control you." _

_ He couldn't really wrap his mind around that idea, but he nodded because he wanted her to know he would try. Unsure, he offered her the brush. "Is it broken now?" He'd asked. _

_ She'd hesitated, but then taken it. "No, Loki. It's not broken." Then out of nowhere she dropped it on the floor again and brought her heel down on it. The sound of the handle shattering into a hundred tiny shards of ice made Loki flinch. "Now it's broken." _

_ Loki had stared at the shards of ice melting into a puddle on the floor with the feeling that something really Big and Bad had just happened. _

_ He was six._

* * *

Loki shoved the memory aside and reached for his magic so he could restore Frigga to vitality, only to find his magic gone.

"Motherfucker!" he hissed, searching for the scent of geraniums, a murderous rage burning through him. He was so sick and tired of being treated like a fucking pawn is some godsdamned game she was playing! _He_ was the gamemaster! _Him_! And she dared to _toy with him_!? When he got his hands on her he would tear her apart.

But it was not there, the scent of geraniums It hadn't been Agda. His eyes fell on the scepter, and it's steady pulse of light, and he remembered that as he'd carried Frigga he'd felt a vague sort of strain and then relief. He hadn't thought much of it at the time, so distracted by trying not to run into any Frost Giants, but now he had little doubt that that strain had been his magic. Pouring into the scepter.

He had never heard of such a thing happening before, but the magic of the scepter was wild and unexplored. He had little doubt that such a thing was possible.

Sighing and cursing, Loki picked the scepter up, marveling again at how unique the magic within it was. Magic had a kind of language, but the Energy was like nothing that he'd ever seen before. It was difficult to control, and hard to understand, and almost like it had a mind of it's own.

He played around with it, trying to figure out how to communicate with it, and eventually got it do do what he wanted. But instead of just unfreezing Frigga, it burned her.

There was a sharp crack as the frost broke from her skin and fell to the cave floor and she inhaled hugely.

"Take your time," Loki said, all of a sudden feeling tense, and awkward, Frigga always made him that way. "Smell the flowers." So, okay, perhaps not the most appropriate thing to say to a mother figure when she's taking her first breath in months after being frozen alive. But, hey. There wasn't exactly protocol for this. Not that he would have followed it, he admitted to himself, even if there was. He wasn't much of a fan of rules.

"What-" Frigga said in little gasps, her voice hard. "are- you- _doing_?" Her eyes, normally a cornflower blue, had darkened as she glared at him.

Christ how that tone of voice made him bristle. He was _not_ a child anymore.

"I'm helping _you_!" he said, anger getting the best of him. Almost out of nowhere he was engulfed in flaming anger, that she could let this happen to herself. He'd been worried _sick_ over her, and- and that was it. He hadn't even allowed himself to think it before, so distracted by the Bifrost, and fucking Agda messing with him, and Sif, and Darcy... But now it was glaringly obvious: he'd been worried about her. And now that he knew she was okay, the worry had been replaced by anger that she'd put him through that. Never mind that she could never have intended for it to happen.

"You should not be here," she shot back, glaring harshly at him as she flexed her muscles tiredly. They must ache after being stiff and motionless for so long. "You should not be among...these creatures."

Loki laughed bitterly. How quickly they came upon their old arguments. "I _am_ one of these creatures," he said bluntly. His lip curled when she tightened her jaw and he stalked off to the mouth of the cave. She was barely back and already he couldn't stand to be near her. It had been like this ever since he'd grown into a teen and realized that no matter what he did- she would _never_ treat him as she treated Thor. She would _never_ love him. So he'd stopped trying.

His resentment had grown deeper as Thor was showered with more and more honors and awards- though his resentment had never truly ever been aimed at Thor. In truth, Thor did deserve them. He was an excellent warrior, and he brought peace with him. And if he was reckless and arrogant about it, then he was also loyal and kind.

No, it was Frigga who idolized him, and Odin, who so easily shrugged Loki aside. It was them who he had started to hate. He realized now, thanks to his time on earth as a human, what he had never realized before: he had just been being a teenager. He'd been moody and had misplaced anger- just like every teenager in the history of ever. It was just that he'd actually had the means to do something about it. He'd been born with a gift- a gift that he'd cursed for how it set him apart, but that he had grown to love out of necessity. If he was stuck with it than at least it would serve him well.

So he'd nurtured his gifts and with Agda's help, he'd gained control over them. Eventually he had become quite powerful with magic, even if he was not nearly physically on par with Thor when he had a sword in his hand.

And every time he'd acted out, every time he'd played a bit of mischief, he thought now that it might all have been to see the look of distaste on Frigga's face. Which took a little bit away, now, from the Fuck You that it had been meant to be. But at the time every prank had been a little closer to the freedom from wanting her approval, and that was what he had been straining for so hard: to be free of the need to be validated by her. He hated the power she had over him.

Strangely, Odin had never affected him quite the same. He'd had his own issues with Odin, but they had never been as long-term or as deep-rooted as with Frigga, even though Odin had in fact punished him much more violently. Odin was tough, and he was harsh at times, but he had always been willing to give Loki another chance. Frigga had never given him a chance to begin with.

He could hear her scraping the ground as she moved around at the back of the cave and he glanced back to see just what she was _doing_, only to curse himself for a fool.

He looked out at the blizzard just beyond the cave and then longingly back at the dryness of within the cave and sighed. There was no help for it.

He took his jacket off and offered it to Frigga, who stared at it blankly.

"Take it," he said. She was shivering, her body not reacting well to being thawed and then thrust immediately back into a freezing environment. It was cold, even for him, and his body could tolerate much lower temperatures than hers could. She must be in considerable discomfort, and there was a real risk of frostbite. There were various magical means to get limbs back, but it was not a pretty thing, and the experience of losing one was not to be desired.

If he'd had his magic he might have offered to transfigure her, into an acorn as he had done to Idun, perhaps, so that she would not feel the cold so. Not that she would have agreed, he was sure. If there was anything that Frigga abhorred more than Frost Giants, it was magic. As it was though, Loki did not trust his skill with the scepter to even make the offer.

She sat against the wall, huddled, with her knees bent and up at her chest looking miserable, and the least queenly that he'd ever seen. Usually she was perfect, not a hair out of place. It must be humiliating for her to be like this, Loki thought. The whole thing must be humiliating.

"I'm not going to t-take that," she said, refusing to reach for the jacket.

Loki felt a flash of annoyance. He was getting cold now, too, without it. The least she could do was alleviate some of his guilt by just _taking_ the damn thing.

"Yes, you will," he said firmly, draping it up over her knees and up to her neck, covering her shoulders. It was thick and warm. It should help. "I'm going to look for firewood."

Frigga frowned deeply. "In _this_ weather?" She asked skeptically.

"Yes," Loki said shortly. "Obviously in _this_ weather. I can do it, with a little help from this," he said, patting the scepter. Well, he was relatively sure he could do it, anyways. And it was always good to play up your sureness.

He did note with relief that her shivering had gotten less violent. Getting the pack of food he'd brought, he put it on the ground next to her.

"I know you're hungry," he said, "but try to eat slowly. Your stomach isn't used to food and it will rebel if you give it too much at first. The same goes for water."

She gave him an odd look that he couldn't decipher and said, "I know."

Right. Of course she did.

"Well, excuse me for trying to help," he muttered to himself, heading back out of the cave.

"I didn't mean-" she started, but Loki cut her off. It wasn't important, really.

"No, it's fine," he said.

"It's cold out there," she said. Was that her way of asking if he'd be okay? Loki wondered.

"Don't worry about me," he said, letting his skin turn blue. His Frost Giant features were always waiting for him, ready to make an appearance as soon as he gave the word, and the molecular make-up of his skin combated the cold more effectively when he was in this other form. "I'll be fine."

And he walked out into the blizzard.

The storms of Jotunheim were infamous for their unpredictable. They could as easily last for days on end as they could go an hour and then leave as suddenly as they came on. The one thing they could be counted on was their brutality, and that when they came they came _violently_, wind whipping through the landscape unforgivingly. Part of the reason Frost Giants had grown to be so tall was that the storms left drifts of snow six feet high at a time from an average snowstorm, and they had _had_ to have longer legs just to survive from day to day. You could not hunt for food if it took you hours to go just a few hundred yards.

Neither Loki or Frigga had this advantage, and especially with Frigga being stiff and unused to such exercise- it would be a long way back.

As soon as he sent a hint to the scepter that he wanted it's help, he felt it waking and reaching out. He could almost _feel_ it, trying to understand what he wanted, and he was looking forward to being able to study it at length, because it was _fascinating_. He wondered that he had not ever heard of it being used, except as an ingredient in magical objects. What was wrong with his ancestors, that they would not make the most of such an incredible thing?

The scepter pulled him away from the mouth of the cave, and up the foot of the mountain they were at. It was difficult to sway it from it's task so that he could use it to melt the snow in from of him so he could actually move, but he managed to convince it. He could vaguely feel his own magic within the scepter, but it was faint and seemed disinclined to return. It had been his constant companion for some two hundred years, and the only time he'd been without it was when he hadn't known any better, down on earth. But now that he was himself again- he felt it's loss keenly.

The scepter's pull proved correct, and Loki was able to bring back some dead branches that a quick drying spell rendered burnable. What he was more worried about was getting out of Jotunheim without leaving a clear trail for Frost Giants- or Beasts- to follow. How were they supposed to travel through this land- especially Frigga- without him having to melt the huge drifts of snow from their path first? He sighed. Another problem.

Frigga was shivering again when he got back, and Loki felt a stab at his conscience, not that it was really his fault.

"You came back," she stated, and Loki gave her a look. Was she out of her mind?

"Of course I came back," he said, dumping the wood on the ground a few feet in front of her.

"I th-thought maybe you'd leave me here," she said. "As...revenge, or something. I don't know," she said, looking uncomfortable now. "I suppose it seems silly, now."

It was insulting, really, that she thought that lowly of him, and it stung. Why she would think he wanted revenge on her, he had no idea. Revenge for what? Her only crime was not to love a child that wasn't her own- which was no crime, really. Simply a sad fact on his end.

"Well you may rest easier, then, Frigga," he said softly. "I have no schemes of vengeance against you. Now hush and I'll start a fire."

She did, and he pointed the scepter at the wood and spoke a spell for fire, and the wood burst into flames in moments. He smiled, pleased- he was getting better at communicating with the Energy.

"Thank you," Frigga said, stiffly, and Loki looked over at her from where he sat across the flames. She was eying the fire warily. "I _am_ grateful. That you came for me."

Loki nodded, a little flush of pleasure running through him at the praise, reluctant though it was. It was no wonder he'd stayed away from her for over a hundred years- he was so wrapped up in wanting her approval that it was unhealthy.

"Well, it was on the way," he said, brushing off the thanks.

Her lips curled ever so slightly, and the white scars marring her perfect face contorted. Interesting. He wondered how his father would react on seeing her again. He'd never really been sure what was at the basis of their relationship. It could be love. Neither of them were very affectionate, but he supposed they might love each other in their own way.

"No, really," he said, for some reason wanting it to be clear that he hadn't done this just for _her_. "I needed something from Jotunheim, and you just ended up being there too."

"Of course," she said impassively. He noted with approval that she'd stopped shivering entirely and now looked to be completely fine. "And just what did you need from _this_ realm?" She frowned. "And how are you _here_?" she asked. "Last I knew you had been sent to _Midgard_ or some such. And Odin- is he? What is the state of Asgard?" Her voice became more worried, the more she remembered.

He'd been wondering when the past would catch up with her. The last time he'd seen her had been in the throne room as Baldr knocked him unconscious and she'd looked at Baldr with an expression of shock on her face. He wondered how much more had gone on when he'd been out of it.

"You were sent to Midgard," she said. "I saw- him- do it. Odin must be alright, then. Yes? To have brought you back." She was anxious now, her eyes troubled but hopeful.

"Yes, he's fine," Loki assured her, and she sagged in relief. "He woke from his Odinsleep in time to set everything to rights. Bringing you back was the final step." He paused, thinking it over. "Well, I suppose there are more steps now, since the Bifrost broke, but aside from _that_-"

"The Bifrost..._what_?" Frigga asked, shocked.

"Broke," Loki repeated. " It's dead. Finished. Over. Bye-bye."

Frigga clearly did not know how to handle this news. "I- _how_?" she asked.

"Laufey," Loki said grimly. "And me," he allowed. "There was a fight. The Frost Giants came in through the Bifrost somehow-"

Frigga frowned. "That should not be possible."

"And yet it happened. When sent to Earth- Midgard- I suppose, Thor and I were given new memories, and we were as mortals. We did not even know who we had been- that we had ever been someone else. We did not even know each other very much, having been given memories of each other that we didn't get along." Which, in itself was strange and made him think that Agda really must have had a hand in his sentence to Midgard. That detail was exactly one that would have delighted her.

Frigga listened with amazement. "And is he- is Thor alright?" she asked.

"He's with his wife and children," he said. "But he is trapped there." He looked at the flames as the wood crackled before him. "I hope he is okay." And that he was looking after Darcy and Nathan.

Frigga's brows rose. "Wife and _children_?" She repeated with incredulity. "He has mortal children?" She asked in horror.

Loki nodded. "As do I," he said. "Well, one child, and anyways."

_ Nathan..._how old was he now? Six? Seven? Christ, how time was flying by- and yet how long every day was. He hoped Darcy was taking pictures. He hoped they were happy, and that they were well.

"This has all gone wrong," Frigga said, rubbing her brow tiredly with a hand that Loki couldn't help but notice had only four fingers. Her pinkie was missing.

His poor mother, he thought. They had all suffered because of Laufey.

"None of this was supposed to happen." She sighed sadly and gave short, sharp laugh. "I had it all planned out, you know? Thor was meant for Sif. Once he got a little older- once he matured a bit- they would have gotten along just fine. He was already friends with her- it would have been easy to push him into something more. And of course she was half in love with him, anyways- it would have been nothing."

Loki looked at Frigga with interest. He hadn't known how much thought she had put into this- but then, he'd been away from court for a long time. A hundred years, at least, by his count.

"Does he love her?" She asked, staring into the flames blankly.

Loki thought back to those years on Midgard- the weekends that he and Darcy had spent with Thor and Jane, of the look in Thor's eyes when he glanced over at Jane playing with the kids.

"Oh yes," he said.

"Well that's...horrible. What is to become of her in the years ahead? What of his children?"

Loki had the same worries when it came to Darcy, and Nathan. Already he had missed several years with them. And how much longer would they even have? It would never be enough.

"He'll probably ask that she take the test to become Aesir," he said. It was what he would do with Darcy, when he got back to her.

"Do you think she could pass it?" Frigga asked, hopefully.

Loki thought about it. It was different for each person, but it was always a rigorous, nightmarish thing that put you through hell and then spat you out. "Gods, I hope so," he said. And he hoped Darcy could too.

Frigga must have caught on to the undercurrent in his voice when he'd said that, because she looked up at him curiously. "You love her too, don't you?" She asked. "Your own wife, I mean."

_Darcy_. He could almost smell that lemon perfume she loved so much. He dug his nails into his arms sharply, trying to beat back the longing through physical pain.

"More than life itself," he said solemnly.

Something passed over Frigga's face before she shrugged her shoulders.

"I had someone in mind for you, too, you know," she said ruefully, and Loki looked at her with some surprise. He had not expected that. "But I suppose that's gone up in smoke as well." She shook her head as if dismissing her matchmaking as foolish. "The best laid plans," she murmured.

"Hmm," Loki said noncommittally. He couldn't afford to think like that- he _needed_ his plans to work.

They talked for a little longer- Frigga told him a little of what had transpired with Laufey on her end, and Loki was surprised- but pleased- that she had volunteered information to him. She was normally so self-contained. It was more out of loneliness than anything else, he figured. She hadn't had anyone to talk to in months.

But the tolls of the day soon caught up with him and he drifted off to sleep, his last image of Frigga, staring into the fire, her eyes burning with something fierce.

Loki did not envy Laufey. He had much to answer for.

* * *

The fire had burned out when he woke in the morning, and the air was chill. He stretched stiff muscles in his back and neck. Sleeping on the ground was never ideal.

Frigga was awake already, and she greeted him with a small smile. The scars on her face were actually incredibly beautiful, the way the sun was just coming up and finding it's way into the cave. They were like silvery feathers, marking up and down her beautiful face- an interesting contrast to her refined, sculpted features and her light blue eyes. Long had Frigga been known for her incredible beauty, even among Asgardians- who were famed for their beauty.

It was a cruel joke that Laufey had disfigured her so, and yet almost poetic. Of all the Asgardians he knew, Frigga was the most proud. To have a reminder on her own skin of when she had failed- to have to see it every time she looked in the mirror- it was cruel indeed.

But she was smiling slightly, and it was a beautiful thing, scars and all. She was a good woman, whatever her faults with him had been, and there was a reason that she was beloved by the people.

"Good morning," he said, sitting up and reaching for the pack with food.

"You still do it," she said, almost _fondly_, as she pushed the pack towards him.

Loki frowned. What was she talking about?

"When you were a baby," she explained. "You used to talk in your sleep." She shook her head, smiling down at her hands. Loki frowned to notice that they were dry from the cold, and the stumps where she was missing her pinkie on one hand and her ring finger on the other were inflamed. "I didn't know you still did."

"I talked when I was a baby?" Loki asked, distractedly. He wanted to help her- he could use the scepter to calm the inflammation. But she abhorred magic. How could he bring it up in a way that she would accept his help?

She chuckled briefly. "Well, not with _words_ at first, of course. But you would murmur in your sleep." She smiled. "You would always let us know if you were having a good dream or a bad one."

Her eyes found his warmly. "I hadn't thought of that in years," she said with surprise.

Hang on. "Us?" He frowned. "I was under the impression that Maggar watched over me." Maggar had been his nursemaid until he was six and had graduated to being tutored with Thor.

Frigga looked at him as if he must be daft. "Not until you were a year old and didn't need me anymore," she said.

_I always needed you_.

The thought was reflexive, and Loki brushed it away, annoyed by it.

"Oh," he said, a little uncomfortable. "I hadn't realized."

Frigga stared at him piercingly, her head cocked to the side. "I'm beginning to think there is a lot you didn't realize, Loki."

Loki coughed, looking away. He was beginning to think so too, and he was finding that he did not like the idea that perhaps he had been blinded by his own issues. And it was unpleasant to think that he might not see as much as he liked to think he did.

He took an apple and bit into it. It's skin was crisp from the cold, and refreshing.

"We should leave as soon as possible," he said. "Do you think you can walk?" Frigga sent him a withering glance and he raised a hand. "Well you _were_ frozen for like six months. I'd imagine _anyone_ would have a rough time walking after that."

"I can walk," she said firmly. "And I can leave now. You're right- we should be leaving. How far into Jotunheim are we? You said we were to walk, so I assume you cannot flash us home for whatever reason, correct?"

He stared at her, a little shocked. He was so unused to seeing her like this that it was easy to forget that before she'd married Odin and become the All-mother she had been a fierce warrior in her own right.

"Well?" she asked.

Loki swallowed the bite of apple in his mouth and nodded.

"Right, then. You can finish that as we walk. We haven't a moment to lose."

"Umm. Okay," Loki said, impressed. He got up and shouldered the pack. "Let's get this pony on the rode."

Frigga rolled her eyes. "Well, I suppose it's better than being called an ass," she said, standing up as well and brushing her skirts off.

Loki frowned. "What- _oh_," he said, grinning. "You made a joke."

Frigga raised a brow. "How shocking."

Loki chuckled. "I just didn't know you had a sense of humor," he said.

"Perhaps because it's dry, like my old bones, rather then reaching out and smacking you in the face, like some people."

Loki laughed a little harder. Where was this playful woman coming from? He had never seen her before.

* * *

They made slow progress, and their cheerful mood of the morning quickly dissipated.

It was no longer snowing, but the night before had done it's damage. The snow was higher than ever and Loki had to be constantly using the scepter to melt the path ahead of them, which meant he was constantly focusing his energy and he had a pounding head-ache before the sun announced it to be afternoon.

And that was not to mention the chilling cold- he had put his blue self on to combat it, and the constant motion helped a little, but poor Frigga suffered more severely than him, his jacket not enough of a match for the bitter temperature.

The brilliant white of the snow hindered how far ahead Loki could see, and so sometimes he had to backtrack because he'd started going the wrong way, and he had to squint to be able to see in front of him. What he wouldn't have given for sunglasses.

Their feet had gotten soaked before he'd figured out how to make the newly melted snow run on either side of them like small twin streams, rather than just become a puddle at their feet. He'd done a drying spell on them and then one to make their clothes water-resistant, so that was something at least. But his mind clutched onto the feeling of frozen, wet socks sadistically, even though he knew them to be dry now.

Never had he thought he would look _forward_ to the the huge, slippery sheets of ice that were the ground on the far side of the mountains.

They ate lunch while walking. And then dinner. When night fell and prohibited them from going further, they dug themselves into tall snowbanks and packed the snow tightly over themselves. It would actually act as an insulate after the chill wore off after an hour or so.

It was a miserable way to spend the night, and it did nothing to improve their moods.

The next few days passed in a similar fashion.

Loki had finally said fuck it to strategy and just reached out to Frigga for her to give him her hands one night after he saw they were more raw than normal, and he'd performed the spell. Neither had said anything about it, but his spell had worked and the inflammation was gone from the severed joints, and the dryness as well.

They talked little, each living in their own mind as they walked on, endlessly through the the frozen wasteland.

Loki's mind more often than not was caught on memories of Darcy, and of Nathan. It was a brutal way to spend the day, stuck in memories of such a happy past while he was stuck in such a stark, depressing land.

Sometimes he thought he'd just dreamed them. That maybe it was all a cruel joke that had been played on him- some wild story about falling in love with a mortal woman. _Him_. The God of Mischief. That someone would walk up to him one day and say, "Hey, buddy, I know you've been trying to get back to Midgard, but here's the funny part- ain't nothin' waiting for you there. I've just been fucking with you! Isn't that great? Here, have a bite of my sandwich."

There was always a sandwich involved. Maybe he was just really wanting one. He was sick and tired of the multi-grain bars that he'd packed, seemingly by the hundred. What he wouldn't give even for another apple. What had he been thinking? That the bars would give them more nutrients than anything else and kept better. But they sure as hell weren't as appealing.

Still, miserableness and difficulties aside, they _had_ made progress. They didn't have to actually _climb_ any of the mountains, but rather go through the valleys _between_ them.

They were walking, again- everything drearily, monotonously familiar. Loki's head throbbed nearly constantly now, and he cursed his magic for the thousandth time. The scepter probably _could_ get him back to Asgard- it was the main part of the Bifrost, for the gods' sakes!- but fuck if he could figure out how.

"Can you-?" Frigga asked, gesturing to the snow and giving him the canteen. One thing they did not lack was a water supply.

Loki obliged, and handed her the canteen, now filled with fresh water. As he did so he noticed that her hand was shaking slightly.

"Are you okay?" He asked, frowning. Perhaps he could...do...something, he thought vaguely. It was hard to concentrate past the vice-like pressure on his brain that came from using the scepter constantly.

"Of course," Frigga said dismissively. "It's just the cold. It's fine."

Loki nodded once, letting it go, but his frown remained. He'd tried using a warming spell on her, but it had slid off like water on oil. He wasn't sure if it was because of the scepter, or if it was just Frigga. She had seemed to know something about it but refused to speak of it.

As for himself, it affected him poorly. He wasn't able to control the strength of the spell using the scepter in the same way he could when he used his own magic, and instead of just warming him it had burned him, as it had burned Frigga when he'd melted her from her ice casing.

"We should keep going until nightfall," he said, though she surely already knew that. It was more because suddenly he couldn't stand the silence anymore than anything.

Frigga just nodded and put the canteen back in the pack, her hands going quickly back to the warmer solace of his jacket's pockets.

He had hoped that she would continue their exchange, but she fell silent again. And it turned out that he was too tired after all to really pursue it.

The snow was good cover. Especially for Frost Beasts- like the great white snow lions that prowled the mountains, living off of the hardy snow rabbits and goats that lived on the slopes of the mountains, and- when they could get them- unwary Frost Giants.

Loki almost didn't notice it as it leaped for him, so well did it's coat blend in with it's surroundings. When he did notice, there was just enough time to brace himself somewhat for impact, and to hold up his arm in defense and then it was on him.


	11. Chapter 10

"_I_ want to be the one to give it to her," Ellie said. She clapped her little hands in excitement.

"Fine," Nathan said, a little disappointed. "But I'm telling her it was _my_ idea."

Darcy smiled at the two of them through the rear-view mirror. Nathan had gotten good at compromise thanks to Ellie. Ellie, on the other hand, had always been fine with compromise. As long as she still got to do what she wanted no matter what.

It was Jane's birthday today, and they were going over to her work to surprise her for lunch because Thor was taking her out at night and the kids wanted to give her her birthday present "On her _birthday_, otherwise it's not a _birthday_ present," according to Nathan. When she'd pointed out that presents were presents and that it was nice no matter _when_ you got them, they'd just given her a look, and Nathan had sighed and said, "I can't believe you gave _birth_ to us." Darcy had grinned and tweaked his nose. "And yet I did. Let me tell you, giving birth is _not_ something you forget."

But they'd insisted, and who was Darcy to say no to two adorable little mini-hers? So there they were, going down to SHIELD to surprise her with a photo of them all from Christmas a few months ago. The frame had shooting stars and planets on it and the bottom read "There's always SPACE for family!" in wacky letters. It was cheesy and silly and sentimental, and the kids had wrapped it themselves and written a note that said: HaPPy birThday to the Best Aunt ever!

Jane would love it.

The rest of the car ride was spent with the two of them bickering over the pros and cons of Sesame Street vs. The Suite Life of Zack and Cody. Honestly Darcy tuned out a bit, only to smile briefly in amusement at the memory of Cole Sprouse's stint on Tumblr when Nathan brought up the Suite Life.

Otherwise, her mind drifted over the day to day things. She should fill up on gas on the way back, at the cheaper station over on South, and what was she going to do about the ending to her book? It was...unsatisfying as it was, and wOW that guy needed to CAlm himself down when making right on reds when there was a sign that expressly said No Right on Red and he ought to just check his privilege at the wheel because ain't no way he had any business beeping at her like she was responsible for any of this.

...The SHIELD building Jane worked at had been a college back in the day, and so it was set up kind of like a campus. She parked in the guest parking lot and wondered briefly what SHIELD stood for. But she didn't care that much. Jane had probably told her some time, but it hadn't stuck. She was like Sherlock- she couldn't just carry around pieces of information that were irrelevant. She needed that space for other things. Like remembering where she put her car keys, because fuck if she wasn't losing them all the time.

The kids hopped out of the car faster than she could, having to locate her purse from the foot of the passengers' seat.

"Which way do we go, mommy?" Ellie asked, looking around.

"That is an _excellent_ question," Darcy said, emerging from the car, bag in hand, and Ellie beamed. She was like Darcy in that way. They both loved praise.

There was a main building up ahead across a pristine green lawn that looked promising, and then two other smaller buildings that sat on either side like trolls waiting ominously under a bridge. But she was perhaps being fanciful.

"Let's take the road more traveled by," she said, pointing at the main building. "The yellow brick road, that is."

Ellie looked at the pathway and made a face at Darcy. It was one of Darcy's favorite looks, honestly, which was good- because she got it a lot from Ellie. It was like a frown of confusion mixed in with a smile of amusement because she knew whatever was happening was supposed to be funny even if she didn't quite understand it- and it made her face scrunch up so that she looked like an adorable little goblin angel.

"But mommy," Ellie said. "It's _red_."

Darcy smiled. It was a brick pathway- a _red_ brick pathway.

"So it is," she said. "Off we go?"

"To see the wizard?" Nathan asked, smiling dryly, and Darcy laughed as they all headed towards the building.

"Oh frabjuous day!" she sang, delighted, ruffling Nate's hair before he skipped ahead and out of her reach, sending her a withering look over his shoulder. "Calloo callay! Come to my arms, my beamish boy!"

"Whaaat?" Ellie called back, her face scrunched in that amused look as she walked a little ahead of them.

She was always a little ahead of Darcy, in more ways than one, Darcy thought with a twinge of anxiety. So far her Frost Giant traits continued to remain dormant, but every so often she would do something that made Darcy remember the Frost Giant in her blood, and it was frightening, because Darcy wasn't sure how she was supposed to handle it when it surfaced. How were you supposed to tell a child that they could do things other people couldn't and that it had to be a secret even though you really, really wanted to use them? It was like telling someone that they just couldn't _be_ themselves, which she was just fundamentally against.

It hadn't really been a big issue yet, but Darcy worried. Oh well. What would happen would happen, she supposed. But there were certainly an awful lot of things that she wanted very badly _not_ to happen...

"You got it wrong," Nathan called from just in front of the building where he and Ellie now waited for Darcy to catch up. Lordy but they had long legs! "Those are from two different verses."

Darcy smiled wryly herself, finally getting to the door and opening it for them to go in first. "Really?" She asked dryly. Nathan had become an endearingly incurable know-it-all. He read voraciously, and seemed to have a memory that forgot nothing. "And how was it supposed to go?"

"Well," Nathan amended, "I mean, it _kind of_ was. But you got the order all wrong. It's supposed to go: 'And hast thou slain the Jabberwock? Come to my arms, my beamish boy! O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!" He chortled in his joy.' So, points for trying, I guess."

'Points for trying'? Darcy smiled widely. Oh yes. That was her son.

"I should pull you out at parties," she said. "You're really something else, kid."

The elderly woman behind the desk had been watching their exchange with amused silence, but Darcy approached her now.

"Hello!" She said cheerfully.

"Well hello there," the woman said with a friendly smile. Poor thing. She probably didn't get many visitors.

"What about me?" Ellie asked, pouting a little as she tugged on Darcy's hand. "Aren't _I _ something else _too_?"

Darcy tweaked one of her jet black braids. "You certainly are." Ellie's pout passed instantly on to curiosity about a pamphlet that was at her level and she picked it up, looking at the pictures. She was quite the mood-changer, Ellie was. "Sorry," Darcy said with a smile to the woman. "So we're here to visit Doctor Jane Odinson, and we were wondering which building she worked in. Do you know?"

"Mrs. Odinson?" the woman said with a brisk nod of her head. "Oh but of course! She's on the second floor, in room 221B. Is she expecting you though...? It's not normal for us to get visitors around here."

"I thought not!" Darcy exclaimed, pleased to be right. The woman blinked at her in surprise, and Darcy coughed. "Ah...I mean, thank you very much for your help. And no, she's not exactly expecting us. But it's her birthday," she explained. "And we're surprising her."

"Oh," the woman said, smiling. "Well isn't that sweet. Just sign in here, please," and she pushed a clipboard with a sign-in sheet towards Darcy and three badges that said VISITOR on them.

"I suppose we'll see you on the way out," Darcy said cheerfully, handing the signed clipboard back to the woman, who nodded, distracted by the ringing phone. She gave Nathan his badge and put Ellie's and her own on.

"Okeedokes, guys. Straight on until morning."

The main lobby tapered into a long, wide, white-tiled hall that was full of employees in long white coats whose job seemed to be to come and go from as many of the multitude of rooms that lined the hall as possible. Darcy wrinkled her nose at the strong chemical smells that came out of a few of the rooms they passed. There was a reason that there was a saying about stopping to smell the flowers, rather than stopping to smell the chemicals.

At the end of the hall there was a set of thick, double doors much like those Darcy remembered from high-school, and beyond them were the stairs. The second floor resembled what they had seen of the first, the only exception being that there were noticeably less people meandering the halls. Presumably the first floor was more for administrative things.

Darcy noted with amusement how almost every room was either such-and-such-number room A or such-and-such-number-room B. It all seemed much more complicated than it had to be.

But they found 221B without too much trouble and knocked on the door.

"Come in," came Jane's muffled, distracted voice from within.

"It's us, Auntie!" Ellie cried as they came in the door. She hugged a bemused Jane's leg in greeting.

"Happy birthday, Jane," Darcy said with a grin to her old friend.

"We brought you a present," Nathan said solemnly, making Darcy grin wider. Gift giving was apparently a very serious business.

"Oh!" Jane exclaimed delightedly, putting the paper she'd been looking at down on the desk. "Well this is such a wonderful surprise! You guys are so sweet."

"They were quite adamant that we see you on you birthday," Darcy explained, leaning against the door-frame.

"What are you writing?" Ellie asked curiously, looking at the paper Jane had put down. It was filled with highlighted sections and little notes all over it.

"Oh, that?" Jane said, waving it off. "Boring adult science stuff. Like magic and portals to other worlds, and unicorns-"

"Mommy," Ellie said, her eyes wide. "I want a science too."

Darcy laughed. "After that explanation, I'm not surprised. But aren't you going to give her her present?"

"Oh yeah!" Ellie said, beaming, and Nathan smiled with superiority and shook his head at her short memory. She ran back to Darcy, who pulled it out of her bag. "This is for you," Ellie said, a little shyly now.

"Well, thank you very much," Jane said graciously, her eyes a little misty. "And who wrapped it?"

"I did," Nathan said quickly. "And it was my idea. But- everyone did their part, I guess." He had a keenly developed sense of fairness for an eight year old.

Jane smiled at that and unwrapped it. "Oooooh," she said with delight when she saw it.

"That one's me," Ellie said, quickly pointing out where she was in the picture. "And that's you."

"Yes, I see," Jane smiled. She looked up at Nathan and Darcy. "It's _lovely_. Thank you."

"I knew you'd like it," Ellie said, beaming once more, now that it was clear the gift had been a success.

They visited for a few more minutes, but Darcy rounded the kids up quicker than they would have liked because Jane _was_ at work after all, and they should really let her get back to the important things that she had to do. Jane gave each of them a hug as they left and thanked them again.

"Oh!" Ellie exclaimed, remembering suddenly. "Look, mommy- I found a trick."

"Mmm?" Darcy asked, looking through her bag. Seriously. She was sure she'd put her car keys in the _front_ pocket, but they weren't there. This was just getting ridiculous. What had she done with them!?

"Mommy!" Ellie exclaimed in irritation. "You're not paying attention!"

"Calm down," Nathan told her, and she shot him a look. "And I don't think that's a good idea, El."

"Sorry, honey," Darcy said, looking up at her. "I am now. Go ahead- but watch where you're going, El. Sorry about that," she apologized to the man Ellie had just bumped into. He looked down his long nose at her and then ignored her, stalking off. Yeesh. People these days.

"Look," Ellie said again, pleased with herself. Darcy looked.

And her heart stopped beating.

She heard an intake of breath from a doorway, and looking up she saw the expression of incredulity on the face of a brunette in glasses. The woman seemed to come back to herself after a moment and reached for her phone.

_ Fuck._

It was her worst nightmare.

"I'm blue," Ellie said, grinning up at her mother. But her grin faltered and she frowned at the frozen look of shock on Darcy's face. "What's wrong?" She asked.

"Ellie," Nathan said, looking surreptitiously around at how her stunt had affected the people in close proximity. "Cut it out." He didn't look as surprised as everyone else.

Ellie did so, her skin slipping back into it's normal pale color. She didn't look pleased anymore. She looked like she was about to cry.

This made Darcy snap out of it suddenly, her protective instincts kicking into gear. She sent a glare to the hallway of scientists, hoping they got the message to Back Off and Not Ask Questions, pulled Ellie and Nathan to her and marched as quickly down the hall as possible.

"Shhh, honey," Darcy said distracted and afraid of the way the people in the hall were whispering to each other. Oh god, this was just the worst thing possible.

"Ma'am," a large security guard said, coming out of nowhere to block their path on the stairwell. "I'm gonna need you to come with me."

Another brawny security guard joined him, and two more appeared at the top of the stairwell, effectively trapping them. And just what the fuck did this place do that they needed so many terrifying-looking security guards, anyways!?

Ellie did start to cry then. Nathan looked at Darcy, worried, and Darcy clasped both of them to her protectively. "Mom?" he asked uncertainly.

"I'm not going anywhere with you, and neither are my children," Darcy said fiercely. That just wouldn't happen. "And you have no authority to tell me what to do. You're going to step aside and let us through the door, then we will leave this building and you will never see us again."

"I'm afraid I can't let you do that," the guard said. Her stomach sank even lower. She hadn't thought that was possible. "That's quite a trick that she's got," he nodded at Ellie speculatively, and Darcy bristled.

"I'm sure I have no idea what you're talking about," she snapped at him, wondering if there was really even any point in denying it. They probably had video tapes for security reasons. "But you can go to hell."

There was radio static from their walkie-talkies and a voice said something that Darcy didn't understand, but whatever it was made the two security guards before her exchange looks and advance forward.

Darcy was terrified and angry and felt so helpless. What was she supposed to do?

"We're not going to hurt you ma'am," one of the guards said, frowning at Ellie's tears. "We just want to ask you some questions."

"Oh no," Darcy said, shaking her head. "I'm not telling you anything. I don't even know who you are." What was happening!? Why was Jane working here? And that was another thing- "Where is Jane? I want to see her. _Now_."

The door opened then, and the security guards parted to let a new man through. He was very plain-faced and average-looking, especially next to the burly guards, but there was something about him that intimidated Darcy. A sense of sureness, and of control, that was only accentuated by his expensive-looking suit and unnecessary sunglasses. They were inside, for god's sake! Just what the fuck he needed them for was beyond Darcy. And if _that _was beyond her, then why she was spending so much time thinking about _sunglasses_ in this situation was _galaxies_ beyond her.

The atmosphere of the situation changed abruptly though, the guards clearly yielding to his authority. The ridiculousness of the fact that this was all happening in a stairwell struck Darcy suddenly. He looked like one of the Men in Black. It would have been almost funny, if not for the kids.

He took his sunglasses off and smiled at her in what she was sure was supposed to be a reassuring way. It didn't really work. To be fair though, pretty much nothing was going to be reassuring her at this point.

"Mrs. Laufeyson," he said, and his voice was soft and almost comforting. "Ellie, Nathan," he nodded at the kids. How did he know their names? "I'm sorry to have scared you like this. Believe me, we wouldn't have wished to do it this way. Of course, it was entirely unexpected, but there you have it."

Ellie had stopped crying, and she was staring at the man in the suit with wide eyes. Darcy hadn't even noticed, but she'd been stroking Ellie's hair comfortingly. Nathan just watched it all, a little detached but taking everything in.

"SHIELD has been watching you for some time now," he continued. "Your connections with Thor make you quite the interesting family."

Oh god.

Darcy's stomach sank even _further_, something she really _really_ hadn't thought would be possible. At this rate it would be 20,000 leagues under the sea, and there was just no way she'd be diving _down there_ for it. It was too bad. Her stomach had been pretty helpful until now. Her subconscious licked it's lips tiredly, crying with regret.

"We're not trying to hurt you or your family, I assure you, but we have many questions. We'd just like to talk, really." He frowned at the security guards. "I really am sorry that this is how we must be meeting."

"What if I don't want to talk to you," Darcy said, bristly. Bitterly. Just how much did he know? "Do I have any choice in this?"

The man had the grace at least to look abashed. He shook his head regretfully, but his voice was firm. "I'm afraid not, ma'am. If you'll just follow me?"

Darcy glanced from the security guards to her kids, being so brave and just watching all this happening with wide, owl-like eyes, and then at the man in the suit. He had a kind of quiet, understated authority about him, but she didn't think for a minute he wouldn't follow through. She nodded reluctantly.

"Great! This way please."

He motioned for the security guards to let them pass through the doors behind him, and he led them down the hall on the main floor. The people milling about the halls let them through, watching with interest as they passed, and when they went by the lobby the receptionist frowned with concern.

Finally he ushered them into what she seemed to be an interrogation room, though why on _earth_ Jane's _science_ lab required an _interrogation_ room, Darcy had no idea.

There were only two chairs, on either side of a table, and the man in the suit had one of the security guards get two more. They left after bringing them.

"I'm Agent Coulson," the man in the suit said. "And I'm sure you have questions of your own. I believe we could be mutually beneficial to each other."

Darcy narrowed her eyes at him. _You bet your skinny little ass I do_, she though.

"Who is SHIELD?" She asked, staring daggers at him. "And why were they watching Thor?"

"SHIELD is an undercover association that does a variety of different things," Coulson explained. "This particular branch is for research and development, for the most part, but we have other divisions that do more hands-on work. The bottom line, Mrs. Laufeyson, is that we help people. We...protect people."

Darcy frowned.

"So you're like police," Nathan said, before she could open her mouth. He was staring up at Coulson, utterly intrigued.

Coulson chuckled briefly. "Yes. Yes, we are a lot like police. Except sometimes there are threats that the public doesn't know about. Threats that are more...supernatural in nature. And we try to stem those threats before they become known." He noticed the worried look on Darcy's face, and clapped his hands together, clearly not wanting to focus on this. "But that's just one division-"

"If you monitor threats," Darcy asked, troubled, "then why were you watching Thor? Why were you watching _us_?" It was such a horrifying, frightening thought that their lives had been the fodder of strangers.

Coulson smiled slightly. "Well, as I was saying, Mrs. Laufeyson, that is just one division of SHIELD. An equal part of it is dedicated to research- which leads to our very own anomaly: Thor Odinson. Quite the unusual man, I think you'll agree, though he has kept a remarkably low profile for the past decade. The first few months he was here, though, it was an entirely different story."

Darcy frowned. She'd never heard this before. "What do you mean?"

"Let's just say it took the God of Thunder a little while to become accustomed to Earth, and he certainly made our radar during that time period. But that's not the important part," Coulson said, waving it away. "What matters is that he's been putting up a remarkably good show of being human. This intrigues us, naturally, seeing as how he is _not_. And that's how you first came to be on our radar, Mrs. Laufeyson. But then, you're quite intriguing in your own right, aren't you?"

Darcy snorted. Her? "Umm, not exactly."

"Yeah, mom's really not," Nathan interjected, making Darcy smile wryly.

"See? My son can attest to the fact that I have no life."

Coulson looked at her with amusement. "But that's not exactly true, is it?" He cocked his head to the side and stared at her intently, making Darcy squirm uncomfortably. "Does it ever bother you, Darcy Lewis- that your life doesn't make sense?" Darcy frowned at him, wondering where he was going with this. "I don't even know where to start with you, to be honest. Perhaps your parents?"

"I was adopted," Darcy said, wondering what this had to do with anything.

"Yes," Coulson agreed. "By a perfectly normal couple. By all accounts you grew up as quite the mischievous girl down in West Virginia. But that's not what I'm talking about. Your birth parents, Darcy. Did you never think of trying to find them? Most people in your situation would."

"I never really felt the need," Darcy said, shrugging. "The people who raised me are my true parents." She'd never gotten that urge to find out who had given her away as a baby. "I try to live in the present, Agent Coulson. The past has no place in that."

"Fair enough," Coulson said, letting it go. "But if you should ever get curious, let me know- I think you would find it to be quite interesting. Moving on though- your childhood was normal enough,"

Darcy snorted. "Thanks."

"- and your teenage years, as well. But then you moved to New Mexico. And that's when you get _really _interesting."

New Mexico? That had been _years_ ago. Darcy thought back over it, trying to figure out what would make him think it was anything special.

"I spent a year and a half working for Jane as a secretary," Darcy said, looking at Coulson in confusion.

"And that's where you crossed paths with Thor again," Coulson said.

"Right," Darcy said, frowning as she remembered it. It was a hazy memory- it had been years, after all. "At a bar. I can't remember why I would have been at a bar though- that's strange. I hate those places."

"A year and a half after that you gave birth to a boy. This charming young man here, I'm assuming," he said, nodding with a smile to Nathan. "And yet- where was the father, Mrs. Laufeyson?" He asked, his attention turned back to Darcy. "You're clearly married. You don't go by your maiden name anymore, and we've found documents proving your marriage- and yet no sign of the mysterious Loki Laufeyson. Not a whisper. It's as if he never existed."

Darcy gave a start at the name, and some confusion that she couldn't put a name to suddenly overwhelmed her. "I've heard that name before," she said. God help her though, she couldn't say why.

Coulson looked at her closely, examining her reaction, she was sure. "I believe you," he said finally, sounding a little surprised. "And thus my curiosity grows. Which begs the question- who was the father of the most astounding Ellie? We would all be _very_ interested to know."

Ellie looked up at the sound of her name and smiled at them all. She'd grown bored of their adult conversation and had been playing with Darcy's purse and the objects inside it. Seeing no one was actually paying attention to her after all though, she went back to merrily playing with the objects inside Darcy's purse.

"I'm sorry," Darcy said, shaking her head. "I'm trying to understand this all- and please, correct me if I get something wrong." Coulson nodded assent. "You've just told me that you're part of an organization that protects people- making the fact that you've been watching my family and digging into my history out to mean that _we_ are threats- and you want me to be open with you? Seriously? I'm here_ against my will_, and I'm sorry if I'm not feeling very _talkative_ under these conditions."

Coulson nodded slowly, his face blank, but she could read disappointment on it. "And you have every right to that," he said calmly. "The people I work for just wanted to make sure that you heard us out and were aware of your options. If your daughter is what we think she is, then we have many questions and theories that we would like to explore. But these wouldn't just benefit us. If you're telling the truth that you don't know about the father, than it stands to reason that whatever we found out would benefit you and Ellie, too, in knowing what you were dealing with and how to handle it. We wouldn't do anything that you weren't comfortable with, and it would be strictly voluntary on your part, assuming Ellie was willing. And Nathan, too," he said, nodding at Nathan. "I don't suppose you'd tell me if he was like his sister?"

"No, I wouldn't," Darcy said.

"I'm not," Nathan said at the same time. Darcy and Coulson looked at him. "I can just feel it," he continued, a little awkwardly under the intensity of their combined attention. "I'm just me."

Darcy kissed his forehead. Her little boy. "I know," she said quietly. She'd always known. "And that's what makes you special."

"Be that as it may, sometimes these things take a while to manifest."

"Mommy, I'm hungry," Ellie whined, bored of the contents of Darcy's bag.

"I think that's our cue to leave," Darcy said, and Coulson looked like he wanted to say something more but merely sighed.

"Of course." He stood. "But please don't hesitate to get in touch with me if you change your mind." He gave her his card and Darcy dumped it in her purse.

"Yeah," she said. "Well, I wouldn't camp out by the phone. Alright kids, home we go."

People watched curiously as Coulson walked them out, and Darcy glared at them. She hated that they knew this about her family. She hated them all. Well, all but the receptionist, who gave Coulson a fierce glare as they were leaving and started yelling at him. That kind of made Darcy happy.

It was a subdued ride home. Ellie was tired out from the excitement and fell asleep, and Nathan and Darcy were both lost in their thoughts.

Her mind was whirling. They had known. Somehow they _had known_. How often had Darcy been going about her life, unaware that she was being _spied_ on? She suppressed a shiver of distaste.

And they wanted her to bring Ellie _back_ to them!? Were they out of their _minds_!? As if she would _ever_ consider letting them anywhere _near_ her baby girl. And just what the hell was Jane doing, working at a place like that? Darcy intended to have words with Jane tomorrow.

That night Darcy was turning out Nathan's light when something struck her from earlier.

"Nate," she said curiously, "you didn't look very surprised. Earlier. When Ellie went all oompa-loompa."

Nathan blinked his little owl-eyes at her from his bed. "It wasn't the first time she did that," he said.

"Oh." Darcy was rattled. Had her son started keeping secrets from her? She'd thought that wouldn't start happening for a few more years- till puberty at least, and she was suddenly sad. When had her little boy started growing up?

"Not on purpose," he said quickly, sensing Darcy's distress. "Sometimes when we play though and she gets angry, her skin will go blue. But then it's gone really quick. I don't think she even knows it when it happens."

If Nathan had been trying to calm Darcy, he had succeeded in exactly the opposite. Her baby girl couldn't control it- that's what it sounded like. So how long until she did it at school? How long until someone who wouldn't understand saw it?

Darcy took a deep breath.

"And, I don't know if it matters," Nathan mumbled, "but sometimes when it's raining and we're outside, the raindrops freeze to her coat."

Darcy frowned. "How come I've never noticed that?" She asked. Surely she would have seen it at _some_ point.

Nathan shrugged. "They don't freeze for long."

"Huh." Darcy took in this new information. He must wonder what was going on with Ellie, but Darcy was debating how much she should tell him. He deserved to know, and he was very mature for his age- but. Maybe not tonight. "Your sister is very special," she said finally.

Nathan nodded, yawning.

"You're special too, of course," Darcy hastened to add, and Nathan smiled sleepily. "But other people wouldn't understand Ellie."

"I know. Don't worry." He yawned again. "I'll protect her."

* * *

"Oomf," Loki said, the breath knocked out of him. Something cracked and suddenly his chest was in agony.

But there was no time to waste being stunned. Broken rib or no, he had to act now or die.

The Snow Lion smelled faintly of blood, and it snarled furiously in his face. Loki wasn't sure just what _it_ was complaining about. After all, it was _him_ who had a six hundred pound cat pinning him down and that would love nothing more than to eat him.

The arm he'd raised at the last moment in defense felt like it would be crushed if it had to take much more pressure on it, what with the way the big cat's front legs were on it.

The cat darted down with frightening speed, it's long, sabertooth tiger-like fangs heading straight for his neck. Acting purely on instinct, he rolled to the side, and the cat- being off-balance, perched as it was on his body- fell off of him and landed in a heap where Loki had been a moment before.

It only took the cat a second to recover though, and it had soon sprung at Loki once more.

If only the scepter hadn't been knocked from his hands, Loki cursed silently. Thanking everything holy that he'd thought to pack a knife, he reached for the sheath around his waist where he'd put it. Only to remember with a sickening jolt that he'd put both knife and sheath in the pack the night before after using it to skin some unwary rabbits.

He spun out of the way just as the lion leaped again, wincing at the protest his broken rib made.

Where was Frigga? He wondered. It was odd that the lion had targeted _him_ first. Surely it would have identified her as the weaker link between them, wounded and more affected by the cold than he was. But then almost at the same time he realized that that was _exactly _the reason the lion was ignoring her now: Loki was the bigger threat. The lion was eliminating him so that it could take Frigga down at it's own leisure.

The lion snarled again with fury, and in it's black eyes Loki saw fierce intelligence and cunning. Oh yes. It knew exactly what it was doing.

Loki quickly tried to think of what other weapons he might have, that he could try to pull out before it regrouped. He came up with nothing- the knife in the sack was the only weapon he'd thought to bring, despite all his supposedly meticulous planning. To be fair though, at the time he'd still had his magic. Not that fairness would make him any less dead.

If he was to die, he would die fighting, though. Loki tensed to meet the lion as it came at him, ready to try and break it's jaw with his bare hands if he had to.

But the lion never reached him. It gave a sharp, surprised yowl and slowed it's run towards Loki, finally falling to the ground a few feet from him, blood seeping from a wound at it's neck and staining it's pristine white pelt red.

Loki's jaw dropped at the sight of Frigga, wiping the blood off of the knife with her skirts.

"You okay?" She asked, putting the knife back in the sheath. Loki nodded dumbly. He wasn't sure why he was always so surprised by this side of her, but he was. "Here, you should take this," she said, giving him the sheathed knife. "Maybe wear it next time."

"Right," Loki said, taking it. "Thanks. And...ah...good job. With the lion. I thought I was really fucked over there for a minute."

Frigga smiled slightly at that, but then her face turned serious once more. "Oh, Loki," she said wryly. "When will you ever learn? You're my son. As if I would ever _let_ you die."

Loki frowned, something inside him clenching hopefully. Why did everything with Frigga seem so different now than it had before? He almost felt like he was seeing and hearing her with someone else's eyes and ears. Had he really been so blind before that he could not see the concern in her eyes that even now she tried to conceal? So deaf to affection such as had just been in her voice?

He swallowed uncertainly and made to put the sheath on his belt, only to wince at the pain from his rib. Fuck. As if they needed something else to slow them down.

"What is this?" Frigga asked sharply, concern shadowing her eyes. "I thought you said you were fine."

"Tis but a flesh wound," Loki said, trying to wave it away.

"A flesh wound?" She asked worriedly, searching his torso. "Are you bleeding? Does it need to be cauterized? The cold will help ward off infection, but perhaps we should-"

"No, no," Loki said, regretting his flippancy. "That was just a figure of speech. It's not a flesh wound- it's nothing. Just a broken rib."

Frigga stared at him for a long moment, searching his face. Loki wondered what she was thinking. Her face was unreadable.

"Can you heal it?" She asked finally.

Loki shook his head. "If I had my magic, then it would be simple. Painful," he allowed, "but simple. But the scepter...I don't trust myself with it enough to do something as precise as that."

Frigga nodded in acceptance of this and gathered the pack from where it had been dropped when they were attacked. Loki retrieved the scepter, wiping the snow from it's pommel onto his pants.

His rib had gone from a jagged cry to more of a sharp ache, which was easier to ignore. They would push on. He would not let it stop him.

"What happened to your magic?" Frigga asked, startling him. It was still so strange to hear her talk about his magic, when for so many years she had pretended that he had none.

"It's gone," he said, eyes catching on the lion, it's crimson neck standing out so vividly against the white of it's surroundings. They needed to bury it. It was too visible.

"Is that normal?"

He would just shove it under the nearest snow drift. That would cover it well enough, and- what had Frigga asked? His head had started throbbing in sympathy with his rib, and now that has arm thought about it, it was pretty sore too. He shook his head, trying to clear it, but only succeeded in making it ache even more. "No," he said finally, remembering her question. "No it's not normal at all."

He felt a little faint. A quick nap would be just the thing.

"Don't worry," he said, his voice sounding far away to his own ears, "I'll only be a moment."

All was darkness.

* * *

"Hello? Darcy?" Jane's voice was anxious through the phone. "Are you okay? I got your voice-mail, but honestly, I don't really understand-"

"Neither do I, Jane," Darcy bit out. In all the years of their friendship, never had Darcy been truly angry with her. But there was a first for everything. "I don't understand. How could you _work_ for them when they've been _watching_ us? Like fucking ants under a telescope, Jane!"

"I'm sorry, ants under a _what_?" Jane asked in confusion. "Who are you talking about, Darcy?"

"A telescope, Jane!" Darcy repeated frustratedly.

"Why would you put ants under a telescope?"

"Oh, I don't know, Jane, maybe to see if they turn into fucking _Frost Giants_," Darcy hissed. How could Jane do it? She just didn't understand. How could she work for those people!?

"Darcy!" Jane said sharply, starting to get angry now. "Will you just stop with the histrionics and tell me what's going on?"

"As if you don't know," Darcy said bitterly, wishing there was a more satisfyingly violent way to fold clothes. Jane had called back while Darcy was doing the laundry.

"No, Darcy, I _don't_ know. So could you _please_ tell me, because I'm really getting to the end of my patience here."

"I'm talking about SHIELD, Jane. And fucking Mr. I'm So High And Mighty We Can Both Benefit From This Exchange of Information Even Though I'm a Total Creeper Who Has Been Stalking Your Family For Years-" Darcy broke off, forgetting what his actual name was. "Smith," she substituted in annoyance.

Jane made a sound of frustration. "Darcy, you do realize that that glowingly incisive explanation still leaves me _very_ much in the dark, don't you?"

For the first time it occurred to Darcy that there was the _slight_ chance that she might have leaped to the wrong conclusion. It was a little hard, after all, to believe that Jane would knowingly allow strangers with questionable motives to monitor those that she cared about. But Darcy had been operating on blind fear and outrage on behalf of her kids, and it was _possible_ that she'd been overly zealous in her outright condemnation of Jane.

"It happened, Jane," she said tightly, rewinding a bit. "Just after we left your office yesterday. Ellie...she was talking about a new trick that she'd learned, and I wasn't really paying much attention, but then it happened. She- her skin-" Darcy broke off, running a hand through her hair. Every time she thought about it, her heart started racing again, her hand shaking slightly from the nerves. She took a deep breath and pushed on. "It turned blue. And everyone saw. Jane- _everyone saw_. All those scientists that work there doing _god knows what_ saw my little girl turn blue. And then back."

Jane was silent for a moment, absorbing this. "Oh," she breathed. "Oh my. Oh that's not good."

Darcy laughed slightly hysterically. "No. No it's very not good. And what's even more not good is that they wouldn't let us leave until we were interrogated by a creepy man in a suit who said that not only did they know about _Thor _but that they'd been watching us- watching _all _of us- for _years_. Like, every breath we take. Every move we make. Seriously! It's like they took that fucking song as a guide to socialness or something- I can't-" She broke off, unable to keep going.

There was a long silence. So long that Darcy would have worried that Jane had hung up for some reason, if she didn't know her as well as she did. As it was, she could practically hear Jane puzzling this new information out and trying to fit it in with everything else that she knew of SHIELD. Finally, softly, she said,"I didn't know, Darcy. I swear to you that I had no idea."

Darcy swallowed tightly, ashamed of how she'd jumped to conclusions. Of course Jane hadn't known. "I know," she said. "I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, Jane. I just- when it comes to the kids, I just-" All of a sudden, tears pricked from behind her eyes. "They're everything to me, Jane. And I just- I _can't_ lose them. And I'm afraid, I'm _so_ afraid that something awful is going to happen. All day I couldn't stop thinking that I'm going to wake up one of these mornings and I'll go to get Nathan and Ellie up for school only to find empty beds because SHIELD's taken them back to their labs to be experimented on. Like fucking _rats_, Jane- which, as you know, I've got issues about in and of itself, but-"

"Oh, Darcy!" Jane cried in sympathy. "Honey, I'm sure that's not going to happen. They wouldn't dare. And don't you worry about anything- you can be sure that I'll be talking to my superiors about this. It is _completely_ unacceptable!"

Darcy took deep, shaky breaths, trying to convince herself that it was okay to calm down. Her nerves were strung so tight. But she was reassured. Jane was free of blame- that was certainly a weight off her shoulders. She hated to think what it would be like to actually be betrayed by someone as close to her as Jane. Christ, she wouldn't be able to bear it. It was just too much for her to carry on her own. It was too overwhelming. Thor and Jane were such a blessing in that regard.

And Jane was angry, which was good to. She was certainly a force to be reckoned with when she was, and she had at least a little bit of authority at SHIELD. Darcy didn't really understand her position, but it was clear Jane was held in high esteem and was quite valued for her skill and knowledge. Perhaps they would listen to her. Certainly they would listen more to her than they would to Darcy.

They talked for a little longer, and Darcy apologized again, and thanked Jane. She hung up feeling a little more calm.

"I'd yell," Nathan said solemnly from the doorway.

Darcy yelped, startled. "Oh my god!" she said, relieved that she hadn't cried earlier. "You scared me." Her nerves were still raw. She picked up a pair of socks and folded them together. "What were you saying?"

"I'd yell," he said again, his face serious and earnest. At that moment he looked far older than his eight years. "If someone tried to kidnap me, or Ellie. I'd yell, and then you'd know."

Darcy's hands stopped halfway through folding a sheet. "Oh honey," she said softly. Her heart turned over in her chest. He hadn't been supposed to hear that. How much had he heard? "Oh, honey."

She knew she should say something more, but that was all she was capable of at the moment.

"I just wanted you to know," he said awkwardly. "So you- so you wouldn't...worry," he finished, looking down at his feet.

Oh Christ. Her poor baby.

"You'll never be in that position," she said fiercely. "You don't even have to worry about it," she assured him. She would worry about it enough for the both of them, and Ellie too. "I'm going to make sure that nothing ever happens to you."

* * *

Frigga had wrapped his rib with strips of cloth from her hem when he awoke, the sun just beginning to rise. The wrapping was nothing fancy, but it would help keep the rib in place so that it could heal. He thanked her hoarsely.

"It was nothing," she said, handing him the canteen of water. He took a long, refreshing swig.

"The lion-" he said suddenly, remembering.

"Taken care of. It's buried under a snow drift over there." Frigga nodded toward a drift at least ten feet high. Another blizzard would hit, probably sooner rather than later, and the tracks around it would be hidden. "How do you feel?" she asked. "Do you think you can walk? We've lost a day already. I'd rather not lose more."

"I can walk," he said. Even if his rib burst clear through his skin, he would still be walking. He stood, ignoring the protest from his chest.

Frigga nodded in approval. "Good."

And so they walked.

Two days later saw them to the edge of the icy shore of Jotunheim, their luck having returned to them. They had seen no other snow beasts, and the weather had been unusually mild- it only having snowed for a few hours over the course of the past few days, and even then not as hard as it might have.

Loki assembled Skidbladnir again, and soon they were crossing the great river. His rib had started healing by now, and pained him much less. His headaches were gone, too, now that the snow no longer blinded him and he didn't need to use the scepter constantly.

Frigga was relieved to have left Jotunheim behind, and despite her fury at Odin, she was greatly looking forward to getting back to Asgard. Laufey had tormented her over and over with the knowledge that the man who had betrayed her had been her son. Baldr. Baldr who by all accounts had died. And she...believed Laufey. That it was Baldr, at least. There had been something so _familiar_ about him- she could have no doubt. And as for his betrayal, she had seen his eyes. They had been honest eyes. Whatever reason he had done it for, it had not been his choice. It was Odin's betrayal that sent jolts of rage through her- how could he have lied to her about that? How could he have told her that her son had _died_?

Still. Her joy at the knowledge that her eldest lived, and her excitement to meet him overshadowed the anger, and both of them were quite lighthearted as they made their way back to Asgard.

Or at least they were until they realized that they were far from the only ones with that destination. Behind them, spanning an incredible distance on either side, was a fleet of ships, coming fast.

And there was only one place they could have come from.

* * *

_**A/N:** I'm so sorry that it's been so long! Thank you for reading. It makes me very happy to hear that people enjoy it =)_


	12. Chapter 12

"That's-" he started.

"Yes."

Frigga's face was set with a tension that Loki's mirrored.

"They're gaining on us," he said softly, his hand tightening on the scepter. "They shouldn't be gaining on us. We have a lighter load."

"And yet they are," Frigga said simply. "Is there anything you can do? Any way to warn Asgard? Or at least to slow them down?"

Odin kept sentries on the outlying districts by the shore, but they wouldn't be prepared to fight this number of foes even if they weren't being taken by surprise.

"I'll do my best," Loki said grimly, and raised his scepter.

* * *

A month had passed since that horrid day, and Darcy and the kids were at Jane and Thor's house. It was Liam and Isaac's sixth birthday.

It was a beautiful Saturday in May. The past week of dreary rain had finally given way, and the sun had broken through. They were holding the celebrations in the back yard, accordingly. Thor had even broken out the grill and was making hot dogs and hamburgers. The scent of barbequed meat wafted on the air.

Darcy had been expecting SHIELD to put up more of a fight against her, but they'd been silent. She hadn't heard anything from them, and if she hadn't noticed that she was being followed pretty much any time she left the house, she might have thought that that was the end of it.

But even now she could see a black car up the road, it's windows tinted so that she couldn't make out who was in it. She narrowed her eyes at it, aggravated. Probably that Coulson guy. He'd seemed creepy enough to be in on this stalkery-type job.

Ellie's shrill giggle jolted her out of her somewhat grim thoughts. The kids were playing tag, using the-

"Oh snap," Darcy said, jumping up from her lawn-chair when Ellie ran right in front of her. Too late, though. The boys had pretty good aim, and both Ellie and Darcy were dripping wet.

The sliding door opened then, and a frowning Jane returned from the fridge with a bottle of iced tea.

"Boys! Put that hose away. You know better. Come on. Now say sorry to Ellie and your aunt."

"Sorry," they mumbled, somewhat contritely, and Darcy nodded in acceptance. Oh well. At least it wasn't cold out. Ellie didn't care, and she was off again in a moment, shrieking as they continued their game of tag.

"Oh, Darcy- I'm so sorry," Jane sympathized. "Here, come with me. I've got a shirt you can borrow if you like."

"Thanks, bud," Darcy accepted gratefully. Wet clothes were not the most pleasant of things.

There weren't many options, Jane having a much slighter figure than Darcy, but she found a pretty blue blouse that fit, and joined the party again. Some more of Isaac and Liam's friends had arrived, and with them, Darcy noted with dread, their parents.

Ugh.

Darcy was not exactly a people-person. She could make conversation- she could make bloody _great _conversation- but small-talk was the _worst_. It was just so _boring_.

Jane had waylaid them though and they were talking animatedly about something or other that Darcy didn't really care about. She slipped as unobtrusively as possible back to her lawn chair by the grill. Thor shared her aversion to small talk.

Darcy was pleased to notice though that a few older kids had showed up and drawn Nathan off into playing a game of soccer. He'd just been reading earlier, rolling his eyes at the other three as they played tag. Oh Nathan, her Nathan...

* * *

Asgard's shore was a beach sparsely populated by pine trees that turned quickly into a thick forest for a mile or so in any given direction, before giving way to farmland beyond that.

Loki had used the scepter to get them to Asgard faster, and they were able to hide among the trees as Laufey's army disembarked and made their own way through the forest, their long legs eating up the distance. There was no way Loki and Frigga could head them off, or get word out before they reached an area with a populace.

It was so frustrating! Loki could only watch them go in horror and anger, knowing that because he could not act, people would die. But what could he really do? He was intensely limited by the scepter, his head was killing him once more from using Energy too much, and on top of that he was worried he'd re-broken his rib again in their mad dash into the woods. It was certainly complaining quite bitchily.

They set off at a brisk jog diagonal to Laufey's army. Both were tired and worn and hurting in some way or another, but neither complained or slowed. The threat that Laufey posed had sent adrenaline coursing through them. Loki knew that they would probably collapse as soon as it wore off, which pushed him on harder to make better timing, and his rib ached angrily in response. But on the plus side, at least he wasn't cold anymore. That bone-deep chill that he'd carried for weeks in Jotunheim had dissipated on coming back to Asgard's warmer climate.

They finally reached the outskirts of the forest and got to the wheat fields on the other side, with an outpost nearby. The wheat was annoying to run through. It grabbed at Loki's legs, saying _rest here, don't leave us_...

Loki _much_ preferred the forest.

Frigga slowed and came to a stop, panting, and Loki stopped as well. She pushed her long blond hair out of her face.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I just- I just need a minute- to catch- my breath." Her hands were shaking. She held them behind her back so she wouldn't distract Loki.

"Of course," Loki said, gulping in air himself and nearly hissing. Good god damn though, his rib was really pitching a fit.

They said nothing else, each annoyed by the fact that they couldn't just keep going without a break. Loki didn't know how he was going to be able to start running again, honestly. Everything hurt, and the adrenaline was beginning to wear off.

But a few minutes later somehow he found the willpower, and once again they were running.

The outpost was more of a small village. A lanky, red-haired lad showed them to the man in charge.

He was a short, balding fellow, but he had an air of command that Loki was grateful for. Loki was decidedly _un_grateful for the way the man was openly staring at Frigga's scars. She regarded him cooly, utterly the queen, but it made Loki's blood boil. _Of all things to pay attention to at the moment the man would choose that._

"What is this?" the man asked, his eyes still on Frigga's scarred visage.

"Frost Giants," Loki said shortly. "An army of them."

"What!?" he frowned at Loki. "Impossible!"

Loki shook his head. "I assure you-"

"They are already upon Asgard," Frigga said quietly. "The other outposts must be alerted, and a messenger sent to the palace. The army must be made ready to protect it's people."

He looked at her in confusion and annoyance. "I'm sorry," he said. "But who the _bloody_ hell are _you_? Frost Giants in _Asgard_? Have you both completely lost your minds?"

"Hold your tongue!" Loki snapped, utterly out of patience. "Do you not know your queen when you see her!?

"Queen!" He snorted. But he took a second, closer look at Frigga and then paled. "Oh, my lady-" he apologized, aghast. "I am _so_ sorry, my lady. But you- you look- that is to say- I did not recognize you," he ended weakly.

"That's quite alright," Frigga said brusquely. "But the situation with the Frost Giants is _not_."

"That's- so that's _happening_?" he asked in horror, his beady black eyes widening.

"Yes." Frigga held in a sigh.

Loki briefed the commander, who then sent out troops to let the village people know and bring them back in from the fields and into the city's walls. The village didn't have anywhere near enough of a fighting force to go after the Frost Giants.

Food and drink were brought to Loki and Frigga, and they both felt more revived after they'd eaten.

"Go to sleep, Loki," Frigga said finally when Loki was about to rejoin the commander and go over strategies.

"I have to..." he trailed off as he shook his head, trying to clear the cobwebs. He was _so_ tired. "I have to..."

"You'll be no help to anyone if you can hardly think straight," Frigga admonished not unkindly. She put a hand on his shoulder and pushed him to the door. "Go to sleep."

Loki opened his mouth to argue, but it turned into a yawn. He nodded slowly and turned away. Reggie had shown them their rooms, and Loki stumbled off into his. He didn't open his eyes for seven blissful hours, and his sleep was a blank unconsciousness that was uninterrupted by dreams.

* * *

Loki left the next morning, the commander letting him borrow a horse. He rode hard and by noon he had reached the capitol, where a worried groom hastily took his horse off his hands and led it away, no doubt to be pampered and taken care of the way it ought to be. It had served him well, and Loki felt a pang at how hard he'd driven the poor beast.

The castle was in disarray. Word had already reached it of the Frost Giants, and the scent of panic was in the air. Loki frowned as he looked around at the men and women of the court as they whispered fearfully to each other. Where was Odin? He ought to have been doing damage control.

As he strode to Odin's office, a familiar voice called his name. He turned.

"Volstagg?" The last he had heard, the Warriors Three had been out on a mission from Odin that had required them on Alfheim. Loki was relieved to see that at least Volstagg was back. "You have have heard then? About the Frost Giants?"

Volstagg nodded his great head and slapped Loki on the back. "You certainly do like causing mischief, don't you," he said with a strained smile. "The Frost Giants slept for years, but you go to their realm for mere days and up they arise."

Loki scowled. "That was hardly my fault," he snapped. "And you're forgetting that they'd awoken months ago, when the whole Baldr incident happened." Speaking of which, he made a mental note to remember to find Baldr before heading back.

Volstagg waved it away, un-offended. "No matter. Have you spoken to Odin yet?"

"No. I was just going to look for him."

Volstagg turned down the hall that led to the armory and jerked his head for Loki to follow. "He was overseeing some things here."

Loki followed him and sure enough, there was Odin. He appeared to have just finished a speech to the Palace guard, and caught Loki's eye as he came through the door.

His face was it's usual stern self, but he definitely looked tired. There a strain around his eyes that spoke of pain. _His arm_, Loki thought, suddenly remembering with a sickening jolt that his father was dying.

"So," Odin said shortly. "You're back. And you brought the whole of Jotunheim with you."

A muscle ticked in Loki's forehead but he said smoothly, "They are moving fast, and their numbers are great. Do you have a plan of defense? I have a few ideas to contribute."

"Yes," Odin said harshly. "It's called attacking. I will not have them slaughtering my subjects. The army is riding out in but a few hours and they will feel once more the wrath of my steel."

His eyes were hard and frigid, and Loki did not doubt for a moment their deadly intent. But...

"In a head-on attack they have the advantage." He shook his head. "Their swords will freeze our men before they can defend themselves- they have not been trained extensively enough in battling Frost Giants. I must advise you to consider a more long-distance approach. Take them out with arrows, or with fire-balls, but do not meet them head on." It was so easy to picture the massacre that could turn into. "It is folly."

Odin bristled. "You dare tell me what to do?" He snarled with disbelief, his white brows raised. "You dare tell me how to defend my _people_? As if I might not be capable of doing It myself? You know I value your opinion, Loki, but do not ever think that I will suffer you to tell me how to do my job. I have led many wars before." He curled his lip at Loki. "You are a pup yet. Be careful of what you imply."

Loki could scream with frustration. Just once could Odin's pride not need to factor into everything!?

"That's not what I'm saying-"

But Odin cut him off. "I will hear no more," he said brusquely. "The decision is made, and it is final. Now," he looked at Loki, and something shifted in his eyes. "Frigga is alright, I presume," he said, but the statement had a hint of a questioning quality to it.

Loki thought of how he had found Frigga. Of the scars now marring her body, of the stumps where some of her fingers should be.

"She is alive," he said. "She has recovered."

"Good." Odin relaxed infinitesimally. "Where is she? I would like to see her."

"At the outpost in North Fieldings. She is strategizing with Commander Halthor."

"Oh." Odin cleared his throat. He nodded stiffly. "In that case, I'd like for you to take-" he paused for a moment, thinking, "- Sif and Baldr, along with twenty-five men, and return in the direction of North Fieldings, but coming in from the East. I will be leading up the main army coming from the West, and we can trap them between us."

Loki opened his mouth to argue once more that long-range fighting _really_ would work much better, but the expression on Odin's face stopped his tongue. No matter. He would just take situations into his own hands. His men would come in the way Odin wanted, but Loki would make sure they had the best advantage he could give them.

He nodded acquiescence.

"Good," Odin said. "I'll have the commander pick twenty-five men and they'll be ready to head out in an hour and a half. Can you leave by then?"

Loki was sore everywhere. He felt as if he'd been repeatedly kicked by an annoyed donkey. "Yes," he said. "I can leave by then."

Odin nodded approval, but before he could leave, Loki said, "Can I talk to Baldr for a few minutes first though?"

Odin made a face of displeasure. "Do not take up much of his time though," he warned. "I do not want you delaying the leave-taking."

Loki rolled his eyes as he walked away from Odin.

"Baldr!" Loki exclaimed, not at all surprised by how pleased he was to see his friend.

Baldr was packing a small rucksack when Loki burst through the door, his face serious and engaged with his task. But on Loki's arrival a smile broke out across his face.

"Brother!" He greeted Loki warmly. They whacked each other on the back in a manly fashion. "It is good indeed to see you!"

"And you," Loki returned sincerely. There was such a welcomingness in Baldr, and such an openness. Everything about him invited you to like him. As if without much encouragement, Baldr could become your best friend. He reminded Loki of Darcy in that sense.

"I see you're packing." The room was filled with an odd collection of small knickknacks. Interesting rocks, sketches, carvings... Loki's eyes fell on a small white flower that Was lying on a shirt in a pile that looked like it was destined for the rucksack. He smiled. "How is your gardener?"

Baldr's eyes fell on the flower too, and he blushed. Loki laughed. It was quite amusing to see the big man flustered. "I don't have a gardener- I mean I don't, I mean she is a gardener, but I don't _have_ her in the sense that I – you know, she's a wonderful girl- I mean," he stammered, "there are lots of girls. And gardeners. And some gardeners are girls. But I'm sure I don't know what you're talking about." His face was beet red and he wouldn't look at Loki.

Loki smiled and shook his head in amazement. "She's certainly done a number on you," he said punching Baldr's shoulder good-naturedly. He was glad that his friend had found happiness, even if it seemed he was not yet ready to share it. Of all people, Baldr deserved nice things.

"So it turns out you're coming with me," he said, changing the subject. Baldr looked up at this, the color in his face returning to normal. "Odin has assigned you and a small group of other men to come with me as I lead up a squadron to come in at the Frost Giants from behind. We're to leave in about an hour now."

Baldr took this in. He nodded. "Good," he said. "I would rather be with you than any other," and Loki felt a surge of pleasure at the vote of confidence.

He cleared his throat, feeling slightly awkward. He wanted to say something nice to Baldr, too now, but the corniness of all the things he could think of was just too much for him. Instead, he picked up the flower and touched the scepter to it's center, murmuring a quick spell.

He gave it back to Baldr, who looked at him curiously. "Here," he said gruffly. "It won't wither now, or crumple, even if it falls to the bottom of your bag."

Baldr's eyes got suspiciously bright at this. "Thank you, brother," he said quietly.

Loki nodded stiffly, feeling a little too vulnerable for comfort. "Well...I'll see you in an hour," he said.

"In an hour," Baldr agreed.

Loki left him to his packing.

* * *

"- so I told _Jeanine_ that if the bake sale was _so _important to her that she had to go behind my _back_ and bake cookies because mine were- excuse me? Uneatable? Really? And this from the woman who wouldn't know a flan from a souffle- that maybe she ought to just do it without my help. And do you know what she said?"

_ "_Um. Did she ask you to stay?"

"Hah! Not even! So I'm not helping with the bake sale. _You're_ not helping with it, are you? Because I really ought to warn you that you shouldn't encourage her."

"Me?" Darcy laughed. "Oh, _god_ no." The world of bake sales held _no_ appeal- nor did the seemingly endless drama that came with it, if Henrietta James was to be believed. But at least they had moved on from small-talk, which was something.

"Good." Henrietta nodded. "Now, the annual fundraiser on the other hand is being headed by _me_, and I think it would be great if-"

But the hair on the back of Darcy's neck was standing up, and she tuned Henrietta out as she scanned the yard. The kids were playing, Jane was talking to one of the other parents. Thor had gone inside to get something. Nothing was out of place. There was no reason she should feel such a strong sense of foreboding.

"-so what do you say?"

Darcy blinked. "Wait. What?"

Henrietta frowned. "I just asked if you would help me with the-"

"_No, Ellie, you can't play_," one of the boys' friends said, and his voice carried to Darcy, who turned to keep an eye on what was going on.

"_What?_" Ellie asked, confused. "_Why not?_"

"_Because_," Liam said now. "_You're a gi-irl."_

_And what had possessed Liam to say something like that? _The boys were generally really good about including Ellie.

"Darcy? Are you listening?" Henrietta asked sharply.

"Hmm. Yeah."

"_Yeah_," said their friend. "_Because you're a gi-irl_."

_Motherfucking peer-pressure_, Darcy thought with annoyance. She had half a mind to give those boys a stern talking-to. It was complete bullshit, the whole 'you can't _ because you're a _girl_'. Well Darcy wasn't one to just let gender roles be perpetuated- she wasn't going to let these little boys grow into men who still thought that women were inferior in some way. Oh yes, she'd set them straight.

Except Ellie beat her to it.

"_Liam!_" She shrieked, stomping her foot. "_That's just mean. You're being mean!_"

Liam looked a little like he wished he hadn't said anything to begin with, but one look at the sneers on his friend's face and he stiffened his back. "_It's not mean_," he said. "_It's the truth. You can't play soccer, Ellie. Go play with your dolls or something_."

Ellie's eyes flashed. _Oh my god_, Darcy thought blankly. Had her eyes- had they just turned _red_? _Oh no, oh please no, _she thought, her stomach sinking. _Oh please don't let this turn into SHIELD all over again_.

Darcy got up quickly, to go divert Ellie before it could go farther, but again, Ellie was faster.

"You like playing with my dolls too, Liam," she said, outraged, and stalked closer to him.

Liam flushed as his friend gave him a look of surprise. "Do not," he said indignantly. Jane had just noticed their argument and was heading over too, frowning concernedly.

Ellie's mouth dropped open. "You! Oh! You! You- you _fibber_!" she cried, and punched his arm with quite a bit of force.

Liam sucked in a huge breath, his skin paling. The friend next to him looked shocked, and he backed away from Ellie.

_Oh god,_ Darcy thought. _It was just a punch, wasn't it?_ Little kids hit each other all the time...

But as Darcy got closer, it became apparent.

"Oh my god," she said softly, and put a hand to her mouth. Liam's arm was very pale, but his veins were a vivid blue where Ellie's fist had made contact, and the blue got steadily less vibrant the farther from contact it got, but his arm was also covered in a light layer of frost.

"Liam?" Jane cried, kneeling down in front of him. "Baby, talk to me," she said frantically. Liam was still standing shocked, staring at nothing, taking deep, uneven breaths.

Ellie started crying. "I'm sorry," she sobbed. "I'm sorry Leelee, I didn't mean to!"

Darcy hugged her tightly, her heart racing, her fingers shaking. Her poor baby. What was she going to do? How was she supposed to deal with this? What the fuck did she know about learning how to control powers!? It was like the blind leading the blind.

"Shhh, honey," Darcy said, still hugging Ellie tightly. "It's okay honey. Of course you didn't mean it. Of course you didn't, baby. No one thinks you did it on purpose." Ellie clung back to her, still crying. Darcy's shirt was quickly wet with tears.

"I didn't," she said again, tortured. "I promise I didn't, mommy. I don't know what happened- I was just, I was so _mad_, but I didn't want to-" She turned her head into Darcy's shoulder.

Liam was moving again then, and saying something to Jane, who was patting his arms and his face in worry. He looked much better, and seemed to have recovered. Darcy gave a huge sigh of relief.

"What's going on?" Nathan asked, frowning as he came over to Darcy and Ellie. "What happened?"

Ellie burst into tears again and threw her arms this time around Nathan, who stood there confused for a moment before returning it.

"I hurt Liam," she cried. "I hurt him real bad and I didn't mean to and now he hates me." She sobbed harder. "Now_ everyone_ hates me."

Nathan looked at Darcy for confirmation.

"Ellie's temper got a little bit away from her," Darcy explained, running a hand through her hair. "And her frostier side made a surprise appearance."

Understanding dawned on Nathan, and he stroked Ellie's hair. "You're being silly," he said matter-of-factly.

This was too much for Ellie. Her tears stopped, so strong was her indignation. "I am _not_!" she cried.

"Well it's silly for you to think everyone hates you," Nathan said. "So you must be."

"They _do too_!"

"_I _don't."

Ellie blinked her eyes up at him. "You don't?" She asked hopefully.

"Nope."

"But," she said, her eyes darkening, "I _hurt_ Liam. I think you made a mistake. I think you must hate me after all."

Nathan rolled his eyes impatiently. "Don't be absurd, Ellie. I think I'd know if I hated you, and I don't. Although I _am_ getting annoyed with you. So stop whining. People get hurt sometimes- it'll be fine. You didn't do it on purpose, and no one thinks you did."

"Oh," Ellie said uncertainly. "Well."

"Come on, didn't you say you found a good place for a fairy house? Well, I'm ready to see it now. Where is it?"

Ellie brightened slightly, tugging his hand. "This way!" She said. "It's over in the garden..."

Darcy watched them walk off with a lump in her throat. She might not know what to do with the whole Frost Giant aspect of her life, but her kids were incredible.

* * *

As they rode out, excitement was high in the air. Asgard had been unusually peaceful for longer than it's warriors had been happy about. They were glad for a chance to put their training to use.

All except Baldr.

His expression was grim as the men joked about the coming battle around him. Loki pulled his own horse up next to him so they were riding abreast.

"You'll do fine," he said reassuringly. "Maester Bromwell tells me you're the pride of the training yard."

Baldr shook his head. "It's not the fighting that I'm worried about," he said. Loki waited. "It's... Oh, never mind. It's nothing."

Loki thought he had an idea about what it was that troubled Baldr though. "Your gardener is safe, Baldr," he said. "She will be there waiting for you when you return."

Baldr flushed slightly, though nowhere near as red as he had earlier. "We're engaged," he said, somewhat shyly.

Loki broke out in a grin. "That is wonderful news! Congratulations, brother!" He clapped Baldr on the back. "I didn't know it was going quite so well."

Baldr smiled, pleased. "I didn't know," he said, "if it would be acceptable. For me to marry her."

Loki could imagine how Odin would feel about any son of his marrying someone as common as a _gardener,_ however estranged they had been. "Odin can suck it," he said flippantly. "I mean look at Thor and I- we both married mortals. In comparison, a gardener will probably look like a mercy. Not," he went on, "that Odin should be so stuck on titles and such. I've always thought it was idiotic to place such importance in them."

Baldr shook his head, though he kept his smile. "No, it wasn't that," he said. "I wasn't sure if I would be good enough for _her,_" he admitted.

"What!?" Loki cried, surprised. He shouldn't have been though. Baldr put little merit in himself- and certainly not as much as he deserved. "That is madness Baldr," he said seriously. "Any woman would be lucky to have you."

"But she is so..." Baldr drifted off, his eyes getting a dreamy, enchanted quality. "Loki, she is so _kind_. And sweet."

"And beautiful," Loki added with a smile.

"And beautiful," Baldr agreed wryly. "Inside and out. She gave me that flower," he admitted.

"I know," Loki grinned.

Baldr smiled bashfully. "She said that I should keep it as a token of her affection, so that even when I was gone I would still have something of her with me."

"She sounds very nice," Loki said, happy for him. At the same time, Baldr's words made him think of Darcy, and unconsciously he ran a finger over his wedding ring.

"Is he mooning over Nanna again?" Sif asked teasingly as she joined them on Loki's other side. "He is quite head over heels for the girl."

"He is indeed," Loki said with a smile. "like a lovesick cow."

"Moo," Sif said, making a face.

"Oh, the fates take both of you," Baldr said and pulled ahead of them, but he was laughing as he said it.

* * *

They had left the party soon after that, and Ellie had put it from her mind. But Darcy couldn't. She got the feeling that it would only get worse, that Ellie's power would only grow, and if she still couldn't control it? What then? What about when they wouldn't be able to explain it anymore as childrens' imagination when people started asking questions about it? Because it would happen. They'd gotten lucky today.

She'd thought about it for a long time, and she'd come to a decision. However much she distrusted them, she owed it to Ellie to try anything that might help her.

She picked up her phone and dialed a number.

"Hello, Mr. Coulson," she said.

* * *

**_A/N:_**_ Sorry for the long delay, my lovelies! I've been fiddling with this chapter for a while now trying to get it right. But it still feels eh, and I felt bad so here it is. I'll fix it soon =P_


	13. Chapter 13

"We're very glad you called, Mrs. Laufeyson."

"It's just Darcy," she said. "You said you might know things about Ellie."

"We have a theory," Coulson confirmed, "but it remains untested."

Darcy bit her lip. "When you say 'testing', what does that mean?"

"A series of simple, noninvasive tests, I assure you. Mostly assessing her physical responses and reactions to unharmful stimuli, but some cognitive tests as well. And a blood sample, if you're willing."

Well. That didn't sound _horrible._

"I would need to be there at all times," Darcy clarified, "And I would be able to say no to any of it for any reason and walk away. This has to be no-strings attached."

"We could accommodate that."

"And if Ellie doesn't like it then we stop."

There was a slight pause. "Agreed."

"Okay," Darcy said slowly. "Okay. We'll give it a try."

"That is excellent new. May I ask what made you change your mind?"

"She...hurt someone. Accidentally!- of course."

"Ah."

"She can't control it, and I can't help her."

"Well, I believe you're making the right decision, Mrs. Laufey-"  
"Darcy."

"-Darcy, then. What day can you come by for an appointment?"

Darcy gave it some consideration. "Tomorrow would be good," she said. "At around three-thirty?" The sooner the better. Nathan had a soccer practice after school anyways- she could just drop him off and take Ellie over.

"That sounds good," he said. "We'll see you then. It's just the same building you went to before."

Right. Before. She shuddered. _That _had gone really well.

After hanging up, Darcy went to tell Ellie, who was sitting at the kitchen table, drawing. Crayons littered the table.

"Sweetie," Darcy said, sitting down next to her. "You've got a special meeting tomorrow after school."

"What do you mean?" Ellie asked, choosing a blue crayon for her picture. She was very focused on the drawing and didn't look up once.

"Well, I'm bringing you back to Jane's work. There are some people there that were hoping you would play some games with them. How does that sound?"

"What kind of games?" she asked curiously. "Hide and seek?"

Darcy smiled. "No, not hide and seek. New games. Ones you haven't played before."

Ellie thought about this for a moment, and then shrugged. "Okay," she said.

Darcy bussed her cheek loudly, making her giggle. "Good girl. What are you drawing?" she asked, getting some juice out of the fridge.

"I'm drawing us!" Ellie said happily.

"Nice," Darcy said, looking at the picture as she sat down at the table again, juice in hand. "But who's that?"

Ellie had drawn the three of them as stick figures- with a puppy, Darcy noticed with a smile (Ellie and Nate had been begging for one for the past few weeks)- but then off in the corner she'd drawn another stick figure.

She took her blue crayon now and made the one in the corner have a sad face with a tear on his cheek. "That's daddy," she said. "See how I put him over here? That's cuz he's far away right now."

* * *

They had been following the Frost Giants' trail for the past twenty minutes. They had made no effort to conceal their tracks. It was a simple matter.

Loki had outfitted his men with bows, in addition to their swords. Using the scepter, he'd enchanted their arrows so that when fired they would burst into flame- susceptibility to heat being the biggest disadvantage a Frost Giant had.

There had been conversation among the men when they had first ridden out, but now as they got closer to their enemy and the fight to come, all talk ceased. Excitement was in the air, and even Baldr was swept up in it. There was an honor to fighting for the land and people you loved, and he saw it as a penance of sorts.

It happened all at once: hearing the enemy, already engaged in swordplay against Odin's troops, the aiming of arrows, the flames as they soared through the air, and then the fray had swept them up and bows were useless in the close quarters.

In a way it was like coming home as Loki threw himself into the fray. The swords flying, the sharp crying of steel against deadly ice. Shouts of rage, and of exhilaration, of pain, and of success all came together as one in a tragic song. The tang of blood filled his head.

All was chaos. Beautiful, magnificent chaos.

_Oh yes_, something within him purred. _This is what we've needed. _And he was lost to it, lost to the immediacy of the moment and lost to the fight. He and the scepter were as one now. Instinct led him. He was merely a reaction to his surroundings.

He sent great fireballs at the Frost Giants with pinpoint accuracy, Sif and Baldr covering him and keeping others from getting too close and distracting him.

It was so _pure_. He started laughing right there in the middle of the battlefield, as Frost Giants and Asgardians alike fell to the ground all around him, their blood soaking into what had once been a wheat field. He caught Sif's eye. She smiled, a feral, joyous baring of teeth, and he felt a little closer to her: she understood, how freeing war was. How equaling.

Baldr was nowhere close to smiling. His face was grim and set as he fought, but he was like a master as he performed his deadly dance. His form was perfect, his instinct true. For one who had not grown up with the sword, he had certainly taken to it as naturally as breathing.

They fought on.

* * *

Darcy's fingers tapped against her leg nervously as she walked into SHIELD. Ellie, on the other hand, was practically jumping up and down. She loved meeting new people because people typically adored her, which _she_ adored.

"Welcome back," the receptionist said warmly.

Darcy returned her smile, despite her reservations. "Thank you."

Mr. Coulson met them at the front desk, wearing the same suit he had worn before, only now Darcy was paying enough attention to notice that he wore a badge on his breast pocket that read: _Agent Phil Coulson_.

_Agent_. Again, it struck Darcy- the lunacy of all of this. It sounded so sinister. An _agent_.

"Good afternoon, Mrs. Laufeyson," he said with a smile. He nodded warmly to Ellie. "And you, Ms. Laufeyson."

Ellie smiled back shyly and leaned her head against Darcy's leg.

"Darcy," Darcy reminded him, tweaking one of Ellie's braids.

"Of course. I'm so sorry."

"Right," Darcy said. How was she supposed to go about doing this? "Well, good afternoon to you too, ah...Agent Coulson." She made a face. That sounded so strange.

He laughed congenially. "I know," he said, seeing where her thoughts went. "It takes some getting used to." He nodded down the hallway. "If you'll follow me?"

Darcy nodded, and they followed him down the long, brightly lit hall. This time however, it was strangely empty. No one shared the hall with them. It was quiet but for the clacking of their shoes.

"Doctor Whitman is very much looking forward to meeting you, Ellie," Coulson said with a smile at her. "You're quite the special girl."

Darcy relaxed a little at his obvious friendliness. It helped to dull the lingering suspicion from after the last time.

Ellie beamed up at him. "I know _all_ my alphabet," she bragged. "And I can even read some words."

"Well," Coulson said, looking impressed. "Pretty _and_ smart. That's the whole package, isn't it?" He said this while looking at Darcy, who frowned. Was he coming on to her? She shook her head. No. Of course not. That would be ridiculous.

The room Coulson led them to had obviously been redecorated with this meeting in mind, driving home for Darcy just how much the people at SHIELD really wanted this. It was a bright, cheerful yellow room with two windows on the sunny side of the building, the curtains pulled back so that the afternoon light streamed in. It was summer though, and brutally hot, so the windows weren't open. Instead, an air-conditioner hummed from a corner of the room, bringing the temperature to a nice, cool, comfortable one. The walls were lined with bookshelves at a child's height. The rug was a pretty, pale blue that lay like a robin's egg in the middle of the room, accenting the hardwood floors and yellow walls. (And Darcy had noted that the rest of the building that she could see had tiled floors.) It even smelled pleasantly floral.

At the front of the room, behind the door, there was a wooden desk, and behind it, a pleasant-looking middle-aged woman with dark hair and tortoise-shell glasses. A pretty blue and white vase of flowers sat on the desk.

"Well, good afternoon!" she said with a welcoming smile, standing up from her desk to shake hands with Darcy. "The infamous Darcy! I've heard so much about you. It's a pleasure."

"Oh," Darcy said. She glanced at Coulson, who just smiled tacitly. "Well, thank you. Ah, I'm afraid you have me at a bit of a disadvantage," she apologized.

"Oh of course!" The woman's smile widened, and she waved the apology away. "Forgive me- I'm Doctor Whitman. I'll be working with Ellie. And speaking of which," she crouched down so she was more near Ellie's size. "It's very nice to meet_ you_, too, miss Ellie."

Ellie smiled shyly up at her, clutching Darcy's hand for security.

"Sweetie?" Darcy said encouragingly, nudging her. "Do you have something you want to say?"

Ellie blinked her big green eyes up at Doctor Whitman and mumbled, "Hi."

Darcy smiled. Ellie could be a little bit shy meeting new people, until she new for certain they liked her, and then her shyness evaporated. "Good job."

Doctor Whitman smiled and got up, getting a clipboard and pen from her desk. "Now then," she said, "let's just start off slow, and get to know each other a little bit before we get into everything else. "

There was a small, round table by one of the windows, and Doctor Whitman sat down at it, motioning for Ellie to sit down. Ellie looked at Darcy, who smiled reassurance. "Look, honey, there's crayons. Maybe you can draw while Doctor Whitman talks to you." She raised her brows at the older woman in question.

"Exactly!" Doctor Whitman exclaimed delightedly. "I was just about to suggest it."

"Okay," Ellie said, blowing a strand of black hair away from her eyes and sitting down. She picked up crayons and paper instantly.

Darcy looked at Coulson, who had stayed next to her in the doorway. "Are you staying?" she asked.

Coulson nodded. "I'll be watching, just like you."

"Huh." Darcy frowned.

He smiled, and sat in a chair in a far corner, with his own clipboard and pen on his lap. Darcy sat down at the table with Ellie and the doctor.

"So," Doctor Whitman said. "I hear you're quite the artist, Ellie. You like to draw?"

Ellie nodded. "Look," she said, holding up the paper. "I'm making a picnic. See how I did the wolf? He's got big teeth, cuz he's a wolf."

"I see that. My goodness, but he does have big teeth. And what's a wolf doing at this picnic?"

Darcy smiled. "I've been reading Ellie a lot of those Norse Myths lately," she explained. "And she's become quite enraptured by the really big wolf that they talk about in them." She frowned. "Ellie, what's that one's name? The big one who broke all the chains?"

"That's Fenrir," Ellie said authoritatively, not looking up from her work as she picked up a red crayon.

"Fenrir! Yep, that's the name."

Doctor Whitman smiled. "I think it's great that you've been teaching them," she said. "It can never hurt to know too much." Her mouth twisted wryly.

Darcy frowned. "'Teaching'? I guess you could call it that, though I'm sure the books aren't entirely accurate."

The doctor gave a short, surprised laugh. "No. No, you're right. They're really not."

Darcy frowned again. "Yeah, I'm sure a lot is lost in translation. Cuz they were written in Norse originally, right?"

"Oh. I see." She made a little note on her clipboard. Was she making notes about _Darcy_? "So," she continued, "you like the wolf, Ellie? What do you like about him?" Darcy wondered what these questions had to do with helping her daughter, but allowed that the first session might be more one of building a bond of sorts than being immediately helpful.

"I like his teeth. He can bite through _anything_," she said importantly. "And I like," she paused, caught up in her drawing, "um, I like that he got free."

"What do you mean by that?" the doctor asked.

"Well, cuz all the gods thought he was too, um, strong- so they got him all wrapped up in chains and stuff but he got free again. And I like that." She put her crayon down and gave the picture to the doctor. "Here, you can have this. Maybe you want to put it on your fridge," she said. "That's what my mommy does."

"Well, thank you very much," Whitman said, taking the picture. She seemed quite touched. Darcy smiled. It appeared that Ellie had made yet another conquest.

* * *

The battle went on, and Loki lost track of the hours. It was a brutal slaughtering, with no quarter given on either side. Frost Giant and Asgardian corpses alike littered the field.

But the climate was beginning to have an effect on the would-be invaders: they were waning. Their movements were more labored. Their reactions slower. Of the several thousand there had been, by the time it started getting dark only a third of that remained.

The battle-high that had overtaken Loki had dulled now, so that he could look at the field with the horror that he knew to be more appropriate. It sunk in once more that each body had been a person, who had loved, and been loved.

Most of the fighting had moved off the the side of the field by now, where the least number of bodies lay to impede movement.

Odin and Laufey were locked in fierce combat. Loki watched from the corner of his eye as he fought his own opponent. With growing nervousness he saw Odin take a blow to the arm that had him staggering backwards, an expression of deep pain on his face. It had been to his already infected arm, Loki noted.

He dispatched his opponent with a combination of a quick parry and bolt of flame.

Laufey sneered at him coldly, his eyes glinting maniacally as Loki approached the duo.

"So the pup comes to defend the hound," he spat with hatred, his sword raised. "I should have killed you at birth. I should have torn your throat from your runty little body, and never mind what she said."

"I can take care of him myself, Loki," Odin said roughly from beside him, limping from the pain but still scowling at Loki.

Loki couldn't stop the jolt of hurt that came with Odin's words, though he gave no outward sign of it. "You're wounded," he said briskly. He eyed Laufey up , searching for weaknesses. Laufey eyed him back, giving a slight smile at his words to Odin.

"It seems the pup is unwanted even here," he said with a smirk.

Loki ignored him. Laufey was favoring his right side slightly, and he could not hide the beginnings of Heat Fever that were making themselves known: the beading of sweat at his blue forehead, the tired droop to his eyes. He was a formidable opponent, but he was out of his element. Loki was confident that he could take him.

Without warning, he shot a fireball at him. There had been enough talk.

Laufey proved faster than he'd thought, and he spun to the side, dodging it. The fireball fizzled out before it hit the ground (Loki had been careful about this with all his flamework: he had no desire to send the whole field up in a blaze with their own army).

"You'll have to do better than that, boy," Laufey jeered. "I am no stranger to your witchcraft." His eyes glinted with condescension.

But Laufey was only trying to distract him, and would go for his throat should he let his guard down. Loki felt a thrill of anticipation: two could play at that game.

"And yet you fell prey to it," he said, shooting Laufey a sneer of his own. "I've bested you before, _father_. All your knowledge, all your power. And yet I stole your treasure right from under your nose."

"_Frigga_," he snarled, eyes narrowed with fury.

"That's right," Loki said, unable to keep the gloat out of his voice. The memory of it still gave him satisfaction. "She's free now. You cannot touch her."

Laufey gave him a cruel smile. "Oh but why would I want to," he asked in a soft, cruel voice, "after I've had my fill of her for months?"

Odin gave a roar of rage at this, and leaped at him, swinging his sword with a mighty force. Laufey blocked it, but the sword slid down his own and nicked his fingers, making him hiss and stretch them before gripping his sword tightly again. Blood oozed up from them, dripping between his palm and the sword's hilt.

Loki noted it with satisfaction. His grip would be less accurate then.

His own fury had erupted at Laufey's words, but he had tamped it down. Time enough for that later.

Their fight had attracted the notice of a few other Frost Giants, who rallied to their king's defense. Sif and Baldr followed the new foes, parrying them as they came. Loki took the opportunity when it presented itself. Laufey had sent a quick glance at his backup, and in that split-second Loki struck, feeling vicious satisfaction as his sword found it's mark in Laufey's stomach. He jerked it down through Laufey's torso.

"_No_!" came a roar from behind him, and Loki barely had time to process Baldr's cry as he spun back from Laufey, who had fallen to his knees from Loki's blow, blood trickling out of the long gash that was his torso. Loki could barely take his eyes from the fascinatingly sickening way blood was forming at Laufey's mouth, too, bubbling there with each breath.

But he did look away, his mind finally processing Baldr's cry, and he turned just in time to watch with helpless horror as a Frost Giant took Baldr's head. It fell to the field with a thud and his body swayed for a second before crumpling in a pile to join it.

"_NO!" _This time it was Odin's roar, and it held in it pain, anger, sorrow, guilt- so many things that were useless now, in the face of death. He fell to his knees by Baldr's body, and clutched it to him, tears starting to stream down his cheeks.

Loki was frozen with shock. He knew what had happened, and yet his mind refused to accept it. Baldr was dead. Baldr was dead. Baldr couldn't be dead.

All around them fighting had come to a stop. With their leader dead, the Frost Giants seemed at a loss as to what they were supposed to do. Odin's men watched their king helplessly.

"This is your fault!" Odin shouted, and Loki stumbled back as if he had been hit. His nostrils flared and he snarled, "you did this. I was fine! But you couldn't just leave Laufey to me, could you? You had to be the hero. You had to come _rescue_ me. Do I look like a maid in a tower!? I am the _king of Asgard_."

"You look like an old man," Loki spat, the sharp bite of injustice rising in him. His whole body was thrumming with nervous, edgy energy. "You look like a man who's refusal to acknowledge your injuries will get you killed."

Odin's face turned purple. "You should have been looking after_ him_! He had seen no battle before." He clutched the lifeless body to him, his shoulders shuddering with silent sobs. "You should have protected _him_."

Laufey gave a short, bloody, gurgling laugh as he knelt so close to death himself that his eyes were fading even as he spoke. "Should have left him to die," he said with amusement. Then he was dead.

The Frost Giants looked to their second in command for guidance. The man who had killed Baldr, Loki noted as if from a great distance. His fury was fading, quickly being replaced by denial, and he seemed to be somewhere outside his body at the moment. He couldn't think very well.

"Enough," the man said tiredly, drawing back. "Enough." The other Frost Giants followed his suit and drew back as well. "There has been enough bloodshed. This was never my battle. We will leave you to tend to your dead, and we will take our own."

Odin laughed harshly, setting Baldr's headless body down gently on the bloody grass. "That's it!?" He roared in disbelief. "You think I will let you just walk away after this? We had reached an agreement, your king and I. _He broke it_. I have just lost a son that I had barely gotten back. _I am not in a mood for mercy-"_

"Father!" Loki cut him off sharply, stepping between the new Frost Giant commander and Odin, who had been advancing on him. "_Enough_. Lay it to rest. The man is right," he said, nodding to the Frost Giant. His own fury at the man churned within him, and yet he was sick to his stomach at all the death around him. He could not find it in him to kill more. "There has been_ enough_ bloodshed."

"Of course you would take his side," Odin snarled, smacking aside the restraining hand Loki had put on his shoulder. "Of course _you_ would say that. You, who are one of _them_. You don't even _care_ that Baldr..." he broke off and looked away, unable to finish.

Loki slapped him then, hard enough to leave an angry red imprint of his hand across his king's face.

"We're done here," he said abruptly to the Frost Giant. "Take your dead and leave. We will not stop you." He turned to Odin. "And you," he said icily, his voice velvet even as a poisonous hatred bloomed within his gut, "_take care that you never speak those words again_."

He turned on his heel. Let Odin listen to him or not. If they started fighting again then so be it. Loki could not bring himself to care anymore either way. He felt gutted. How was it possible to be both numb and still cringe from the throbbing, aching pain spreading out from his heart?

_Baldr_...

Those who remained had started gathering the dead.

Sif scrubbed the tears from her eyes and knelt down by Baldr's body to say goodbye. They had become friends while Loki had been on his quest.

_ His quest_. Would he ever get home? He had never felt so far from them as he did at that moment, staring down at his fallen brother, the field more red than not with the cost of war. _He could do nothing right_. The thought banged through his mind like a hammer, again, again, again. _He could do nothing right_.

He noticed with a fresh pang that from Baldr's wrist, on a chain, hung the flower Loki had enchanted for him. From his gardener. His fiance. But no, those were both wrong._ His widow_, or she may as well have been. It's petals were now mottled with red, but it was still as perfect as it had been when fresh.

Loki knelt by Baldr's body as well, sharing in grief with Sif. Their eyes found each other, though neither spoke. But seeing the echo of loss on Sif's face proved too much for Loki and he had to look away.

He was so tired. So _bloody tired_.

So much pain. So much suffering. So much loss. Looking back at his life, it was a misery broken up only by brief periods of happiness that simply made the misery all the more sharp and difficult to bear when it returned.

Someone out there hated him very much. They liked to see him suffer. And he was just _so tired of it_. Everything was hopeless. There was no point in loving things. He had loved Darcy: he had lost her. He had loved Baldr: he had lost him.

And Baldr's death was the final straw. He just couldn't do it anymore. He couldn't love things. It was bad for him.

Something was happening around him, but he couldn't think. He couldn't think. He couldn't...

The last thing he saw were Baldr's blank, lifeless eyes staring at him in shock before darkness overtook Loki and all he was aware of in the world was the scent of geraniums, and then even that was gone.

* * *

_**A/N: **So the plot is moving along a bit more now. Darcy and Loki will be meeting again at last in the next chapter!_


End file.
